I wear a mask,
Around those I'm not close to.
It's the only thing,
That I can think to do.
To some I may seem cynical and arrogant,
And others see me laugh and act like a clown.
The truth is that I am down.
Beneath this mask,
My tears fall like rain.
Though I do not cheat and usually don't lie,
I have feelings and can cry.
What they will never know,
I am in so much pain.
It's a miracle I'm even sane.
If not for my friends,
There'd be no one there,
Because I'm the queen,
Of onbeantwoord prayers.
Even extended family will never see,
The real me.
I say to them,
I wear a mask around you,
Because to cry in your presence,
Is the worst thing I could do.
My mask only comes off,
For immediate family and friends.
That's how it'll always be,
Until the end.