I know bringing Buffy back may seem like a strange thing to call selfish, but I know a few people who think it was. I feel like I should explain.

she was surprised not to get a thankyou from Buffy even though Buffy was clearly traumatised at the time and also she had no real reason to believe Buffy went to a hell dimension rather than heaven.
I know she jumped into a portal but if she had been transported somewhere bad it seems likely her body would've gone too. Willow had no actual evidence to support the theory that Buffy was anywhere but heaven, but believing she did was a great excuse to bring her back. Also, Willow was smart enough to know that though Buffy could've been in hell it was just as (or more) likely that she was in heaven and would be pulled out of there back into a life of fighting.

I personally didn't pick that because while I agree that Willow had selfish reasons to want Buffy back there was a chance Buffy really was in hell too. I think Willow convinced herself that she was doing the right thing until she had forgotten the fact that she could be doing something very destructive. Despite some undeniably selfish motivations there was still a chance that Buffy really was in hell and needed saving.

With what she did to Tara there was no 'maybe this is the right thing to do' she knew she was violating the mind of someone she loved just to get out of a fight.

I agree with Asvini. Bringing Buffy back was selfish, but like Asvini said, there was the possibility that she was in hell.
But changing Tara's memory just because she didn't want to argue anymore? Absolutely, horribly, unequivocally selfish. :(

I agree what she did to Tara was terrible but I think she was less in control of her actions at that time because she was so addicted to magic.
The will be done spell was before her addiction started and I think a spell to make anything you want happen is extremely selfish and a sign of the irresponsible way she viewed and used magic.

I also think bringing Buffy back was extremely selfish. She's a powerful witch, I'm sure there must be a spell to figure out if Buffy was sent somewhere bad when she died but Willow didn't want to know. I agree with the reasons Asvini said it was selfish and I see another one too. As the next most powerful scoobie when Buffy died she became the boss but with that comes responsability and having to make the hard choices. I think she wanted all the power of being a witch with all the freedom of not being in charge and that was anoter reason she wanted Buffy back.

I have to disagree, Mermaid-Tail, because the "will be done" spell was meant to affect only her. As I recall, she did it so that she could tell herself to stop hurting over Oz's departure. She never intended to order anyone else around. It was an amateur's mistake.

But I do agree about what you said about bringing Buffy back- very good point about her wanting power without responsiblity! And she should have done a spell to find out where exactly Buffy was. Although I think some of reasoning behind all that was clouded by grief.

actually i thought the second time she tried to alter tara's (and buffy's) memory was the worst. she had already done a terrible thing, altering tara's memory after the fight, and still tara found out. and then she promises not to do ANY more magic, BUT she goes off and does another spell to make her forget! that's not only selfish, it's stupid! gah thinking about these times reminds how much i hated willow in the early part of season 6.

Bringing back Buffy was selfish and harsh on Buffy but as time went on Buffy learnt to deal with it.

Willow lyed and hurt Tara very badly, i agree with spikes_girl. Not only did she alter her memory after the whole Glory thing, then she promised she wouldn't do it again and then she did.

I don't think bringing Buffy back was selfish. Willow and the others genuinely believed that she might need rescuing from a Hell dimension, and that she'd be glad to get a second chance at life (most people would). There was also a need for a Slayer, so it wasn't just motivated by selfishly missing their friend.

On the other hand, erasing Tara's memory was just done because Willow was uncomfortable with their argument but didn't want to address it directly.