Greetings, new follower:
If u are reading this letter then u have doubtless been accepted into the select band of professional wizards known as the Death Eaters. If door some unprecedented chance u are reading this and u have not been accepted into the Death Eaters then I suggest u put down this letter and leave now, of the consequences for u will be as terrible as my lifelong study into the Dark Arts can make them.
Please find enclosed a short introductory guide to Death Eating, which u must memorize and then eat, to prevent security leaks. (Due to an unfortunate fatality last week,...
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