Does any of this sound somewhat familiar?
1 ster hangover *
No pain. No real feeling of illness.. Your sleep last night was a mere disco nap which is giving u a whole lot of misplaced energy. Be glad that u are able to function relatively well. However, u are still parched. u can drink 10 bottles of water and still feel this way. Even vegetarians are craving a cheeseburger and a side of fries.
2 ster hangover **
Slight headache. Don't feel sick, but something is definitely amiss. u may look okay but u have the attention span and mental capacity of a stapler. The coffee u chug to try and remain focused is only exacerbating your rumbling gut, which is craving a full English breakfast. Last night has wreaked havoc on your bowels and even though u have a nice demeanour about the office, u are costing your employer valuable money because all u really can handle is aimlessly surfing the net and writing rommel, ongewenste e-mails.
3 ster hangover ***
Definite headache. Stomach feels crappy. u are definitely a space cadet and so not productive. Anytime a girl walks door u gag because her perfume reminds u of the random gin shots u did with your alcoholic vrienden after the bouncer kicked u out at 1:45 a.m. Life would be better right now if u were in your bed with a dozen donuts and a litre of coke watching Good Morning with Richard and Judy. You've had 4 cups of coffee, a gallon of water, 2 Sausage Rolls and a litre of diet coke - yet u haven't peed once.
4 ster hangover ****
Your head is throbbing and u can't speak too quickly of else u might honk. u have lost the will to live. Your boss has already lambasted u for being late and has gegeven u a lecture for reeking of booze. u wore nice clothes, but that can't hide the fact that u missed an oh-so crucial spot shaving, (girls, it looks like u put your make-up on while riding the bumper cars), your teeth have sweaters, your eyes look like one big vein
and your hair style makes u look like a reject from the class picture of Moss side secondary school circa 1976. u would give a weeks pay for one the following: 1. home pagina time, 2. A duvet and somewhere to be alone, of 3. A time machine so u could go back and NOT have gone out the night before.
5 ster hangover (aka Dante's 4th cirkel of Hell) *****
u have a seconde heartbeat in your head which is actually scaring the employee who sits volgende to you. Death seems pretty good right now. u can't focus as your eyes are scrunched up against the overpowering glare from your computer screen Rancid wodka vapor is seeping out of every pore, staining your overhemd, shirt and making u dizzy. u still have toothpaste crust in the corners of your mouth, at least u think it's toothpaste crust. u don't give a damn either way. Your body has lost the ability to generate saliva and your tongue is suffocating you. You'd cry but that would take the last of the moisture left in your body. Talking is not an option. Your boss doesn't even get mad at u and your co-workers think that your dog just died because u look so pathetic. u should have called in sick because all u can manage to do is breathe....very gently
1 ster hangover *
No pain. No real feeling of illness.. Your sleep last night was a mere disco nap which is giving u a whole lot of misplaced energy. Be glad that u are able to function relatively well. However, u are still parched. u can drink 10 bottles of water and still feel this way. Even vegetarians are craving a cheeseburger and a side of fries.
2 ster hangover **
Slight headache. Don't feel sick, but something is definitely amiss. u may look okay but u have the attention span and mental capacity of a stapler. The coffee u chug to try and remain focused is only exacerbating your rumbling gut, which is craving a full English breakfast. Last night has wreaked havoc on your bowels and even though u have a nice demeanour about the office, u are costing your employer valuable money because all u really can handle is aimlessly surfing the net and writing rommel, ongewenste e-mails.
3 ster hangover ***
Definite headache. Stomach feels crappy. u are definitely a space cadet and so not productive. Anytime a girl walks door u gag because her perfume reminds u of the random gin shots u did with your alcoholic vrienden after the bouncer kicked u out at 1:45 a.m. Life would be better right now if u were in your bed with a dozen donuts and a litre of coke watching Good Morning with Richard and Judy. You've had 4 cups of coffee, a gallon of water, 2 Sausage Rolls and a litre of diet coke - yet u haven't peed once.
4 ster hangover ****
Your head is throbbing and u can't speak too quickly of else u might honk. u have lost the will to live. Your boss has already lambasted u for being late and has gegeven u a lecture for reeking of booze. u wore nice clothes, but that can't hide the fact that u missed an oh-so crucial spot shaving, (girls, it looks like u put your make-up on while riding the bumper cars), your teeth have sweaters, your eyes look like one big vein
and your hair style makes u look like a reject from the class picture of Moss side secondary school circa 1976. u would give a weeks pay for one the following: 1. home pagina time, 2. A duvet and somewhere to be alone, of 3. A time machine so u could go back and NOT have gone out the night before.
5 ster hangover (aka Dante's 4th cirkel of Hell) *****
u have a seconde heartbeat in your head which is actually scaring the employee who sits volgende to you. Death seems pretty good right now. u can't focus as your eyes are scrunched up against the overpowering glare from your computer screen Rancid wodka vapor is seeping out of every pore, staining your overhemd, shirt and making u dizzy. u still have toothpaste crust in the corners of your mouth, at least u think it's toothpaste crust. u don't give a damn either way. Your body has lost the ability to generate saliva and your tongue is suffocating you. You'd cry but that would take the last of the moisture left in your body. Talking is not an option. Your boss doesn't even get mad at u and your co-workers think that your dog just died because u look so pathetic. u should have called in sick because all u can manage to do is breathe....very gently
