January, 13, 2011, I ran upstairs and took Reegan out of his crib. He was trying to get out of my arms and I said” happy birthday”!!! I can’t believe he is a jaar old, it feels like it was just yesterday when Jake left Reegan with me. As I was putting his socks on him I tickled his feet and he smiled. I said” hey; your first tooth finally poked through buddy!!!” I was so happy that at least one of his teeth came through because he looks so miserable while he is teething. Reegan crawled to Chris and he picked him up. We walked downstairs and Prince passed me Reegan’s bottle. Blanket walked up to me with an Xbox controller in his hand and said” will u play with me A.J?” I felt bad but, I had to tell him that I couldn’t play with him. I think that Blanket is a little Jealous that he isn’t the baby of the family anymore. Chris and I decided to have Reegan’s party at Havenhurst. I am so glad that I make my own money because I don’t think Chris has any idea how much I spent on this party and he’s scared to find out. He didn’t grow up with the things that I did but, that doesn’t mean my dad didn’t teach us the value of a dollar. We were gegeven five dollars a week for an allowance and when I was younger it seemed like a lot. Chris had gone to pick up the birthday cake at Hansen’s bakery and I started to decorate the house. We are not having anyone besides family at the party because we have a really big family between the two of us. When Chris came back with the cake the extended family started to arrive. Some of the people I haven’t seen since I was three of four years old. Someone knocked on the door and Chris opened it because I was standing on a chair putting blue streamers up. A whole bunch of people piled into the house, most of them were seconde cousins with their kids. There was one woman named Sandy and she was so excited to see me. Chris went outside to greet the other guests and I sat down with Reegan on my lap to talk to sandy. She said” I don’t know if u remember me; I’m one of your father’s cousins.” I thought for a seconde and zei “oh, yeah I know you…I was seven the last time I saw you!!!” She started to sob and I zei “what’s wrong?” She zei “I know that your dad would be so proud of u for how u have stepped up and made this baby your top, boven priority!!!” I never noticed how much I really have grown up since the baby came along. I don’t think my dad wanted to know how bad it had gotten for me before he died but, it was hard not to see that I was headed down the wrong path!!! A few months before he passed away I came home pagina at 3 in the morning and he asked me where I had been. I said” hanging out with my friends; my god do u have to know everything?” He got closer to me and could smell the alcohol in my breath. He said” what’s happening to my angel… I thought u were better than that”!!! He reached into my pocket, pulled out my fake ID and was speechless. He looked under my bed and there was a few empty bier cans lying on the ground. The only good thing about my dad’s passing was that it caused me to stop drinking!!! I looked at sandy and said” I know he would be; I just wish he was here”. She said” he loved u no matter what u did”!!! I said” I hate that we spent those last few months together arguing; we never fought until I hit rock bottom”. Sandy said” your dad was just scared to lose u and ruin your relationship with him”. I said” he didn’t have to worry about that because I was the one who ruined it”!!! I got up and we were all ready to eat some cake. As we sang happy birthday to Reegan I stared at him; I can’t even begin to explain how much I love my son!!! I gave Reegan a piece of cake and before I knew it he was covered with blue frosting. I said” Reegan give Daddy a kiss!!!” Reegan gave Chris a kiss and got the frosting all over his face. Chris stuck his hand in the cake and smeared it on my face. Reegan said” mommy” while I was laughing and I was shocked. I have been trying to get him to say that for weeks and he finally did!!! Everyone clapped and I said” u guys have no idea how long I wanted him to say that for”!!!

January, 15, 2011, Chris sat down at the tafel, tabel with me and said” I can’t believe we are getting married volgende weekend honey!!!!!” We decided to have a very abnormal wedding ceremony and are getting married in jeans and t-shirts. Grandma wants me to wear dress but, Chris and I like our idea better. I haven’t worn a dress in years and I’m not about to start now. I said” Chris just because I’m not wearing a dress doesn’t mean u get to see what I’m wearing before the wedding day.” It’s supposed to be hot the dag we are getting married so the wedding is going to be in the backyard at Havenhurst.

January, 23, 2011, I woke up and screamed at the top, boven of my lungs “IN FOUR HOURS I’LL BE CHRIS’S WIFE!!!” After I took a douche I got dressed in the outfit I’m getting married in, which is what I was wearing when I met Chris for the first time. I even had the fake nerd glasses on that I was wearing when he came in the room. As I turned my DC pet, glb backwards I whispered “I’m getting married daddy!!!” Aunt Latoya got Reegan dressed in a tuxedo t-shirt and came into my bedroom. She said” look at how cute he is A.J.” I took him out of her arms and said” u ready for this R.J?” I kissed him on the forehead and we waited for the wedding to start. Three hours later I was standing behind the sliding glass door with Prince locking arms with me because he is going to give me away. Here comes the bride started to play, Prince and I walked down aisle. I could see Chris at the end and he was wearing a black hoddie with ripped jeans. When we got to the front the priest said:
Who gives this Woman to be married to this Man?
Prince: I do sir
Prince gave me a kiss on the cheek and I stepped under the alter, Chris took my right hand
Priest: repeat after me, I Christopher, Quinn, Roberts
Chris: I Christopher, Quinn, Roberts
Priest: take Alanna, Michael, Jackson
Chris: take Alanna, Michael, Jackson
Priest: as my lawful wedded wife
Chris: as my lawful wedded wife
Priest: to have and to hold from this dag forward

Chris: to have and to hold from this dag forward
Priest: for better for worse
Chris: for better for worse
Priest: for richer of poorer
Chris: for richer of poorer
Priest: in sickness and in health
Chris: in sickness and in health
Priest: to love and to cherish
Chris: to love and to cherish
Priest: till death us do part
Chris: till death us do part
Chris lets go of my hand and started to tear up
I took Chris’s right hand
Priest: Repeat after me, I Alanna, Michael, Jackson take Christopher, Quinn, Roberts
Me: I Alanna, Michael, Jackson take Christopher, Quinn, Roberts
Priest: as my lawful wedded husband
Me: as my lawful wedded husband
Priest: to have and to hold from this dag forward
Me: to have and to hold from this dag forward
Priest: for better of worse
Me: for better of worse
Priest: for richer of poorer
Me: for richer of poorer
Priest: in sickness and in health

Me: in sickness and in health
Priest: to love and to cherish
Me: to love and to cherish
Priest: till death us do part
Me: till death us do part
Blanket walked up to us and gave us the rings.
Chris put the ring on the forth finger of my left hand
Priest: WITH this Ring I thee wed: In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. Amen.
Chris: WITH this Ring I thee wed: In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. Amen.
Priest: WITH this Ring I thee wed: In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. Amen.
Crowd: Amen
I put the ring on the fourth finger of Chris’s left hand
Me: WITH this Ring I thee wed: In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. Amen.
Priest: door the power invested I now pronounce husband and wife; Christopher u may now kiss your bride
My eyes started to water as Chris took off my glasses and kissed me. Chris and I each placed rings on a halsketting, ketting around Reegan’s neck.
We all headed to the tent where we’re having the wedding reception. The DJ asked everyone to get off the dance floor so Chris and I could have our first dance. Read the words to the song of you’re going to miss something:
The song amazed door lonestar started and we started slow dance:
Every time our eyes meet
This feeling inside me
Is almost meer than I can take

Baby, when u touch me
I can feel how much u love me
And it just blows me away

I've never been this close to anyone of anything
I can hear your thoughts, I can see your dreams

I don't know how u do what u do
I'm so in love with you
It just keeps getting better

I wanna spend the rest of my life
With u door my side
Forever and ever

Every little thing that u do
Baby, I'm amazed door you

The smell of your skin
The taste of your kiss
The way u whisper in the dark

Your hair all around me
Baby, u surround me
u touch every place in my heart

Oh, it feels like the first time every time
I wanna spend the whole night in your eyes

I don't know how u do what u do
I'm so in love with you
It just keeps getting better

I wanna spend the rest of my life
With u door my side
Forever and ever

Every little thing that u do
Baby, I'm amazed door you


The CD started to skip and then the theme to footloose came on and we started doing the dance moves.

I been working so hard
Keep punching my card
Eight hours, for what?
Oh, tell me what I got
I get this feeling
That time's just holding me down
I'll hit the ceiling
of else I'll tear up this town
Tonight I gotta cut
(Chorus)
Loose, footloose
Kick off your Sunday shoes
Please, Louise
Pull me offa my knees
Jack, get back
C'mon before we crack
Lose your blues
Everybody cut footloose

Amazed continued and we slow dancing again; everyone was laughing. When it was time to cut our Pac-man themed cake we cut it together. We were about feed it to each other and he smashed it in my face. I couldn’t see and threw my piece of cake on the floor. After the party was over Chris said” I have a surprise for u before we leave on our honeymoon” I got in a car and he blindfolded me. When we stopped he helped me out of the car. Chris picked me up and I said” what are u doing?” I heard a door open and said” oh we’re at Havenhurst…your carrying me over the threshold!!!” He put me down and said” welcome home!!!” while taking off the blindfold. I looked around and it was Neverland Ranch!!! I said” oh my god babe, this is ours?” I started crying and he held my chin and kissed me!!!