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just got this while browsing the net

1.I was kidnapped door terrorists and they only just let me go, so I didn't have time to do it.

2.I didn't do it because I didn't want to add to my teacher's heavy workload.

3.A bunch of nerds stal it to make sure theirs were completely perfect.

4.We ran out of toilet paper at my house last night, and my Dad isn't feeling so good. He grabbed it in a big rush and I haven't seen it since.

5.My mother took it to have it framed.

6.It was in my back pocket and a pickpocket stal it.

7.I let somebody copy it but they never gave it back.

8.My mom's whooping cough vaccination wore off and we had to go to the hospital.

9.My skimpy printer ran out of ink.

10.I wasn't able to do my homework this weekend because when I went ice fishing, the heater inside of the tent got too close to the uithangbord of the tent, starting it on fire. And when I ran out of there, I realized that my cat was still in there. My cat was in there because all the small vis that I catch, I just give to my cat. But when I went back for my cat, the brand was too hot. So I spent the weekend morning the loss of my cat.

11."You zei do vragen 1-10. u didn't say bring them in."

12.My youngest daughter couldn't turn in her homework because her younger step-brother had stolen it, filled it in and turned it in to his teacher to prove how smart he was.

13.My house is being fumigated and I don't want to go in there and suffocate just to get it.

14.I left it in my overhemd, shirt and my mother put the overhemd, shirt in the wash.

15.I didn't do it because I spent all night doing the vorige night's homework.

16.My Dad accidentally put it in his aktentas, werkmap and took it to work.

17.My flash drive exploded.

18.The cleaning lady threw it away.

19.I felt like doing the whole book on the bus ride home, so I did -- but after the first 116 pages, I got bus-sick and puked all over the workbook and all my homework! What a coincidence, eh? So I started an extra credit meld about World War I & II in my car going back home pagina after avondeten, diner and, lo and behold!, my clumsy little siblings all felt carsick and hurled all over it and the World War bibliotheek book (that'll explain the School bibliotheek fine). And it was already too late to start another one, so my mom wrote me a note excusing me for not bringing in my homework. I was looking at it on the bus when Billy (or whoever), who was sitting volgende to me, felt really sick and guess what happened?

20.I put it in the safe, but lost the combination.

21.My child’s locker is jammed and she can't get her homework out of it.

22.Some aliens from outer space borrowed it so they could study how the human brain worked.

23.Had to bail mom out of jail again.

24.A sudden wind blew it out of my hand and I never saw it again.

25.I have the mathematical proof, but there isn't room to write it in the margin.

26.The lights in our house went out, and I had to burn it to get enough light to see the fuse box.

27.I was in the lunch room and another student started criticizing u and I just couldn't let that go without letting him know he was wrong. I searched through my backpack to find something to throw at him, and all I could find was today's homework assignment, so I let him have it.

28.I thought the assignment was uninspiring. I read Moby Dick instead.

29.I got soap in my eyes and was blinded for the rest of the night.

30.Please excuse Jackie for not having her homework she was a little under the weatherman, and there was a big flurry in Central America.

31.I have a solar powered calculator and it was cloudy.It wasn't challenging enough.

32.Our dog has mistaken Reid’s homework for that GOSH DAMN newspaper.

33.I didn't do it, because I didn't want the other kids in the class to look bad.

34.I gave it to a homeless man to line his hat with.

35.My daughter couldn't turn in her homework because her dad had used it to start a brand in the wood stove.

36.A man came into my house last night and threatened to commit suicide. Well, it turns out he had a split-personality, so it was considered a hostage situation. It was a big commotion. Police, ambulance, everything! I can't believe u didn't hear about it! That's why I couldn't get my homework done.

37.A mad circus clown stal it on my bus stop and tried luring me into his house with it.

38.Aliens from outer space abducted my homework. They threatened me and zei that if I didn’t give them my homework that I would be terminated.

39."Sharon didn't do her homework because of her eyes.....She couldn't see any reason to do it."

40.My internet access was down (for emailed assignments).

41.I did my homework in my head, I didn’t know I was supposed to write it down. Then I forgot. volgende time should I toon my work?

42.I left it at Mom's house when she took me back to Dad's house.

43.I did do it all, but before I got a chance to save, my book crashed and I lost it all.

44.I loaned it to a friend, but he moved away.

45.I left it in my locker with last week's assignment.

46."I left it on your bureau last Friday but its just not here and it was handwritten so I can't print it off again, took me ages!"

47.I left it in a hymn book in the choir loft, having used it to mark my solo.

48.I gave it to the substitute.

49.My printer broke and my disk is corrupted. Unfortunately my computer crashed this morning as well.

50.I left my homework on my bureau at home. My dog got ahold of it and slobbered all over it. I didn’t want to bring it in with all those dog germs.

51.I dropped it in the toilet accidentally and it got flushed.

52.I have radon poisoning.

53.My notebook got stolen in the school cafeteria and it had all my work in it.

54.There's a virus in my printer.

55."Joe don't have his homework because our family just got a new paper shredder, and I just had to test it out, and I accidentally shredded Joe’s homework."

56.My father had a nervous breakdown and he cut it up to make paper dolls.

57.Another student fell in a lake, and I jumped in to rescue him but unfortunately my homework drowned.

58.We had no food in the house. I can’t do homework on an empty stomach. Can you?

59.I left it in the back of the truck when we went deer hunting. One of the textbook's word problems offended me. I'm not supporting them door doing any meer of their problems.

60.Please excuse my son for doing so poorly on the test. The uur he puts aside to do homework and studying every week was lost when the clocks "sprung forward" over the weekend.

61.I was at a rally last night.
added by big-fat-meanie
added by big-fat-meanie
added by shaneoohmac13
added by 3xZ
Source: Jirka Väätäinen
added by 3xZ
When I was ten, I played a late night game of flashlight tag with a bunch of neighborhood kids. If u don't know what flashlight tag is, it's the same as tag, but u play it in the dark, the person who's "it" gets a flashlight, and they have to yell the name of the person they see with it in order to "tag" them. It was really cloudy that night, and most people had their curtains drawn, so it was the perfect level of darkness for hiding in.

The side of the straat my house was on was skirted door a broad length of woods. That was basically the boundary for our side of the game. u could run through...
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added by Dreamtime
added by tanyya
#11: Swarm

Swarm is a a former Nazi scientist, named Fritz Von Meyer. He became Swarm after mutant bees devoured him.

#10: The Beetle

There are three different Beetles to choose from. They are Abner Jenkins, Leila Davis, and Janice Lincoln.

#9: The Molten Man

Molten Man was once named Mark Raxton, a scientist for Oscorp. His body was altered in a chemical explosion, causing him to be a villain made of fire.

#8: Hydro Man

Hydro Man was once known as Morris Bench, a man who worked on a shipyard, until he was genetically altered door radiation.

#7: Dr.Spencer Smythe and the spin Slayers

Dr.Spencer Smythe...
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posted by -SkySplitter-
I don't own any of these
_____________________________________________

1. Q: What is red and smells like blue paint?

A: Red paint.

2. Why was six afraid of seven?

It wasn't. Numbers are not sentient and thus incapable of feeling fear.

3. Knock, Knock.

Who's there?

Dave.

Dave who?

Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

4. A horse walked into a bar. Several people got up and left as they spotted the potential danger in the situation.

5. What do u call a man with no arms and no legs water skiing?

I don't know,...
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added by Mike-Ro-Wave
added by 16falloutboy
Source: Me
I saw this elderly gentleman dining door himself, with an old picture of a lady in front of him. I though maybe I could brighten his dag door talking to him.

As I had assumed, she was his wife. But I didn't expect such an interesting story. They met when they were both 17. They dated briefly, then lost contact when he went to war and her family moved. But he zei he thought about her the entire war. After his return, he decided to look for her. He searched for her for 10 years and never dated anyone. People told him he was crazy, to which he replied “I am. Crazy in love”. On a trip to California,...
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posted by KyoyaTategami01
Yo mama's so fat that when she stepped on the scale, her weight was OVER 9000!!!

Yo Mama's so fat, she walked in front of the TV and I missed three seasons of Inuyasha!

Yo mama's so fat, Naruto couldnt make enough clones to see all sides of her.

Yo mama's so ugly, even Tamaki wouldn't hit on her.

Yo mama's so fat that the Dragon Ball Z crew uses her to make craters on set.

Yo mama's so ugly, she's the real reason sasuke left the village.

Yo mama's so fat that when she sat down on a park bench, she caused the Naruto timeskip
.
Yo mama's so ugly that she's like a Death Note. Get someone to look...
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hallo there Nintendo fans im making a new series based off Nintendos beloved characters from the super Mario series. If u are interested click on my profiel for meer information. If not then read on maybe u will get interested?

ENJOY :D made door one HUGE Nintendo fan (SeeUV3 aka me)

roze Yoshi (Main character)

Name: Marry-ann-Hato
Age: 13 1/2 (currently)
datum of birth: ( 2000,july 7th)
personality : Clumsy,kind,a bit too nice sometimes,blunt ,happy ,lovable

Likes: singing, Dancing,Performing,Drawing
Dislikes: Math,Science,Geography

Power Type: electro porter (power of technology and...
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