Random artikels | Original artikels on Fanpop | Sorted door Recency

5

posted by Shelly_McShelly

1. "Remove the plastic wrapper." -- The first instruction on a bag of microwave popcorn; to see the instructions, one first has to remove the plastic wrapper and unfold the pouch.

2. "Take one capsule door mouth three times daily until gone." -- On a box of pills.

3. "Open packet. Eat contents." -- Instructions on a packet of airline peanuts.

4. "Remove wrapper, open mouth, insert muffin, eat." -- Instructions on the packaging for a muffin at a 7-11.

5. "Use like regular soap." -- On a bar of Dial soap.

6. "Instructions: usage known." -- Instructions on a can of black pepper.

7. "Serving suggestion:...

3

6 Reasons why I am GLAD that 2020 is over!

posted by 220406

I know we are in a new year, but I just wanted to tell why I think 2020 was the WORST jaar of my life!

6: Child Abuse

For those of u who don't know(pretty much all of you), I have low self-esteem. The reason why, is because sometimes I have problems with my mother. I don't mean that in a rude way and my mom does love me, but what she does is kind of hurting me a little. For example, when she heard that I wanted to live with my Dad, she got sad and thought I hated her. Also, when she got divorced, she blamed it on me saying I was the reason why her husband left. Because of being stressed, I...

Broadway Limited

posted by Seanthehedgehog

Song: link

Blue lines fly along the screen, then the words appear

Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!

Jazz Band: *Playing muziek with a bass, and drums, and a piano*
People: *Walking into Chicago's Union Station*

July 20th, 1919

PRR Employees: *Cleaning passenger cars with soapy water*

SeanTheHedgehog Presents

The Broadway Limited

Based off of the 1941 movie of the same title.

Paul: *Walks towards a ticket booth* Hi, I'd like one ticket to Philadelphia on The Broadway Limited.
Salesman: Two dollars please.
Paul: *Gives the man two dollars*...

4

Symmetry~

posted by Symmetry_Melody

Our symmetrical leader, Death The Kid.

Symmetry is a very wonderful thing. It divides the naturely correct from the asymmetrical garbage. In the words of one of our greatest lords,"Symmetry is everything." As quoted from Death The Kid. The only possible person who could be meer obsessed with symmetry then him, would be the SymmaSoviet leader, 8theGreat.

One of the most symmetrical things known are butterflies, but this is not true. At times, butterflies WILL NOT be symmetrical no matter HOW u look at them. They are asymmetrical garbage.

People say that 8 is just a number. I THINK NOT. 8 is the perfect example of symmetry. And as...

3

Ways how Lucky Luke would shoot faster than his shadow

posted by Bond_Of_Fury

Ways how Lucky Luke would shoot faster than his shadow

Way 1: He can distract his shadow and quickly shoot. That way he’ll shoot faster than his shadow.

Way 2: He can make a nice drawing and toon it to his shadow. His shadow would think: “Oh, that’s a nice drawing” and then he’d quickly shoot. That way he’ll shoot faster than his shadow.

Way 3: He can make a horrific drawing and toon it to his shadow. His shadow would think: “Oh, that’s a horrific drawing” and then he’d quickly shoot. That way he’ll shoot faster than his shadow.

Way 4: He can throw a rock at his shadow so...

4

100 ways to annoy people

posted by evangelinetom

Get to know a vrienden bookie and place bets for them. Insist on keeping half of any money they win.

Accuse people of "glue sniffing addictions" in public.

Call other people "Champ" of "Tiger.". Refer to yourself as "Coach."

Drum on every available surface.

Sing the Batman theme incessantly.

Staple papers together in the middle of the page.

Ask 1-800 operators for dates.

Produce a rental video consisting entirely of dire FBI copy warnings.

Sew anti-theft detector strips into people's backpacks.

Hide dairy products in inaccessible places.

Insist on giving weather forecasts in public.

Claim to be AMS certified....

36

A boyfriend what every girl would want.

posted by AlxanderRfan

I found this from one site, so I thought it was cool so i decided to post it here.. What do u think ?

When u break her heart- [ the pain NEVER really goes away ]
When she misses u - [ she's hurting inside ]
When she says its over - [ she STILL want u to be hers ]
When she reposts this bulletin - [ she wants u to read it ]
When she walks away from u mad - [ Follow her]
When she stare's at your mouth - [ Kiss her ]
When she pushes u of hit's u - [ Grab her and don’t let go ]
When she start's cursing at u - [ Kiss her and tell her u love her ]
When she ignore's u - [ Give her your...

5

Some quotes and sayings

posted by InvaderGore

Here are some quotes and sayings enjoy.

Life isn't about finding yourself life is about creating yourself

Dream as if you'll live forever live as if you'll die tomorrow.

Life is random so am i.

i don't have a short attention span,I just.... Oh, look a kitty!

You're now aware that u can't say "Irish Wristwatch".

caution i'm not like other girls.

If they laugh,it's funny.

I'm the type of girl that will burst out laughing in silence because of something that happened yesterday.

we're so cool ice-cubes are jealous.

i'm a dinosaur so like, rawr and stuff.

a friend is someone who knows the song in your hart-, hart and can sing it back to u when u have forgotten the words.

the best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen of even touched - they must be felt with the heart.

i hope u enjoyed the quotes and sayings!

16

21 Funny Status Messages

posted by simpleplan

There are many words i could use to describe how I feel about u right now. None of them are nice

To know me is to love me, to hurt me is to dig your own grave.

I want a tazer =)

Has gone to play in traffic.

Is breathing oxygen

I don't have anger issues...You have acceptance issues.

You can emai your complaints to gofuckyourself@idontgiveashit.com

Is wondering if people are two-faced, does that mean u get to slap them twice?

Has new boxing gloves and a nasty temper, fancy your chances???

I like it when people give me a reason to nurture my dark side

SMOKING SAVES LIVES ... It stops me strangling...

3

38. ways to annoy you're older brother/sister

posted by xboxrocksx45

1.if they let u touch their ipod computer of mp3 wis every thing on it!

2.when they try to sleep flicker the lights off and on!

3.when they go with u to the store of something yell "WHY ARE u FOLLOWING ME I'M TRYING TO LIVE MY FREAKING LIFE!"

4.tell you're mom of dad they took crack and now are humping the bathtub!

5.cut their hair in there sleep

6.hide their pet and say u saw get run over

7.yell"this is a very nice box!!!" as loud as u can in their room

8.dump out their 7-up and take to the bathroom then pee in it

9.at the mall say "give me money i want this i want it it it it it it...

The Nut House Episode 5

posted by Seanthehedgehog

Theme Song

Kevin: *Plays piano*
David: *Playing bass*
Liam: *Playing drums*
Liz: *Plays guitar*
Mr. Nut: *Sings* Welcome everybody to The Nut House. Thankfully this is not in Laos. Come on everybody into The Nut House. u can wear anything except for a blouse. Come on everybody, step into The Nut House.
Everyone: The Nut House!

Episode 5: Deck The Halls

Mr. Nut: *Finishes decorating the Christmas boom in the arcade*
David: There we go. Now everyone that waits for their food can enjoy the arcade with some Christmas spirit.
Mr. Nut: We still need a ster though.
Liz: Can I be the star?
David:...

9

50 Things to do in An Elevator

posted by BlackSunshine

Something I got in an e-mail. Still pretty funny. Especially since I've done a few...

1. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, and then act embarrassed when they open door themselves.

2. Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call u Admiral.

3. On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until u hear the penny u dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom.

4. Do Tai Chi exercises.

5. Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: "I've got new socks on!"

6. Meow occasionally....

18

What women say but really mean.

posted by alismouha

"We need" means "I want"

"It's your decision" means "The correct decision should be obvious door now"

"Do what u want "means" You'll pay for this later

"We need to talk" means "I need to complain

"Sure...go ahead" means"I don't want u to.

"I'm not upset"means "Of course I'm upset, u moron."

"You're...so manly "means" u need a shave and u sweat a lot."

"You're certainly attentive tonight." means     "Is sex all u ever think about?"

"I'm not emotional! And I'm not overreacting!" means     "I'm on my period."

"Be romantic, turn out the lights" means     "I...

5

Divorce

posted by Nick16

Why did I get divorced????

Well, last week was my birthday. My wife didn't wish me a happy birthday. My parents forgot and so did my kids. I went to work and even my colleagues didn't wish me a happy birthday. As I entered my office, my secretary said, "Happy birthday, boss!" I felt so special. She asked me out for lunch. After lunch, she invited me to her apartment. We went there and she said, "Do u mind if I goin to the bedroom for a minute?" "Okay," I said. She came out 5 minuten later with a birthday cake, my wife, my parents, my kids, my friends, & my colleagues all yelling,"SURPRISE!!!" while I was waiting on the sofa... naked.

1

Men should be able to wear a larger variety of clothes

posted by andy10B

I love skirts and dresses. They are so pretty. Every woman walks down looking good in them no matter who they are. I could wear any of those dresses and skirts that anyone from kim Kardashian wears to the rok that older women wear across the street. I would wear one on a daily basis but there is a problem I'm a man.

Men can only wear trousers and shorts, if anyone sees a man in a rok of a dress it is considered wierd of stupid. But is it? A enquête i took on this club of 20 people, 75% zei yes to say that men should wear womens clothes and still be men and I am one of them.

Most people would...

4

In Love With a Fantasy

posted by shomill

Is it possible to love someone that doesn’t really exist? Think about it. We do it all the time. A boy in high school sees a pretty girl on the other side of the classroom and imagines taking her to a rock concert. A girl dreams of a romantic picnic with the cute guy that just moved in across the street. These people might exist, but the way we visualize them is almost certainly wrong. I’m as guilty of this as anyone. Then, if we finally get to know these people that we’ve fantasized about, we’re crushed to learn that they are not who we thought they were. Why? Because, quite frankly,...

1

Car Stereotypes

posted by Seanthehedgehog

Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!

Car Stereotypes

There are many different types of cars for many different types of people. Observe.

Audi

Man: *Driving a black A6 at 80 miles an uur down the highway* Get out of the fucking way!!! *Pushes a Cadillac off the road*
Woman: *Crashes into a tree* Maniac!
Man: *Tailgating a Jaguar that is actually going the speed of 55* Come on, don't u know what the speed is?! *Honks the horn* Let's go!! *Honks again* I don't have time for this!! *Bumps into the Jaguar, and makes it crash into...

2

pick -up lines to say

posted by Princess_seki

    You may fall from the sky, u may fall from a tree, but the best way to fall... is in love with me.

Do u believe in love at first sight, of should I walk door again?

Crap. Something is wrong with my cell phone. {Oh Really. What is that?} Its just that...your numbers not in it.

It's a good thing that I have my bibliotheek card. Why? Because I am totally checking u out!!

If a fat man puts u in a bag at night, don't worry I told Santa I wanted u for Christmas.

If I received a nickel...

2

Interesting Facts

posted by Bluekait

inpakken, wrap rage is an actual condition when u feel extreme levels of anger and frustration because u are unable to open product packaging.

Hippo melk is pink.

In the absence of aerodynamic downforce, which is generated door the giant spoilers used, Formula 1 cars would have sufficient power to fly above 150 kph. They frequently race at well over 250 kph.

If u choose not to have children, u will be the first person in your direct linage, since the beginning of time, to not reproduce.

The asteroid (or comet) that killed the dinosaurs 65 million years geleden was the equivalent of a Hiroshima bomb going...

9

2012

posted by GoldnSnitch_96

Ok, alot of people are shittin their pants because some achient calander zei that the world is coming to and end. R u 4 ceral? Plus, alot of u are thinking, but bro, so much shit is going down it isnt funny, the world is gonna end bro! Ok, so stuff looks preatty bad now. Japan is in shit and there are earth quakes and floods. But think about it,what do u think people were thinking during the black plague? of the world wars? The world isnt gonna be over yet. Mabey soon. Mabey the moment u finish reading this your house will blow up. Mabey tomorow a piano will fall on the prime minister. We...