‘Hunger Games’ Animals Ranked From ‘I Want One’ To ‘RUNNNN’ 

‘Hunger Games’ Animals Ranked From ‘I Want One’ To ‘RUNNNN’

From mild-mannered to menacing, Katniss crosses paths with many different creatures.

Dorothy didn’t know how easy she had it with lions, tigers and bears… The people of Panem wish those were the only animals they had to worry about, since many of the ones they run into in the “Hunger Games” series are scary, genetically-altered freaks that want to kill them dead.

Fortunately, there are still some animals in the Districts that would make good pets. So we’re ranking the critters Katniss encounters in the “Hunger Games” trilogy from “I want one!” to “RUUUUUUN!!”

Although we’d never keep one in a cage, we’d love to have this symbol of rebellion as a companion.

When the Capitol’s efforts at spying backfire with the jabberjays, they release them to die in the wild. Instead, they mate with regular mockingbirds to create mockingjays. Mockingjays can perfectly mimic any song and pass it along to the other mockingjays.

With a mockingjay at your side, you’ll always have beautiful music (without worrying about draining your battery), plus it’s the perfect way to say “screw you” to the Capitol.

While we’d prefer doggie kisses to those disturbing goat slurpies, goats are still pretty darn cute. Even with their creepy rectangular pupils.

Lady is an injured goat Katniss buys for Prim. Prim is psyched to have a patient to practice on, and she and her mom nurse Lady back to health. Lady then provides them with milk they can make into cheese.

While a goat is not as cuddly as some pets, when you live in a world where food is scarce, a furry friend who supplies snackage is pretty awesome.

Cats are a common pet, but those wicked claws put them slightly higher on the danger scale. Plus, have you ever watched a cat stalk its prey? Those adorable felines aren’t messin’ around.

Buttercup is Prim’s cat and has a rocky relationship with Katniss because she tried to drown him in a bucket since he was another mouth to feed. But when Katniss sees how he comforts Prim and watches over her when she sleeps, they grudgingly accept each other. And like Katniss, Buttercup is a survivor, which creates a bond between them.

If a cat is in the right mood, it is great for snuggling. They are also independent and scrappy, which makes them an ideal pet if you’re living in a dystopian society.

Jabberjays are a muttation, which are mutated animals created in the labs of the Capitol. They are able to memorize and repeat entire conversations, so they are used as spies. But once people in the Districts realize what those gossiping birds are up to, they feed them lies to relay to the Capitol.

Jabberjays are also one of the horrors of the Clock Arena in “Catching Fire.” They mimic the screams and cries for help of Katniss and Finnick’s loved ones, making them frantic to rescue them from torture.

While Jabberjays are disconcerting and can cause psychological trauma, they’re pretty easy to defeat. Just don’t spill any secrets around them and ignore them if they’re trying to trick you – no running necessary.

From here on out, it’s all horrific muttations worthy of screaming, “Run!” It’s just a matter of how many ‘u’s we need to add in stretching out ‘run’ to properly convey our panic and terror.

Tracker jackers are wasps genetically engineered to track and attack anything that disturbs their nests. Venom from their stings causes terrifying hallucinations, and more than a few stings at once will kill you.

Suffering from whacked-out hallucinations while dealing with painful, oozing welts the size of plums does not sound like a fun way to go. But since the stings can be treated with a special type of leaf, and the tracker jackers can be subdued with smoke, it makes them the least dangerous of the deadly mutts. Although they still warrant a “Ruuun!”

Another horror of the Clock Arena is the Monkey Mutts. They are bright orange with sharp fangs and claws. They viciously attack, leaving deep punctures that cause internal bleeding.

Their attacks seem triggered by eye contact, so it might be possible to slip past them. But then again, it’s darn near impossible NOT to look when there’s a crazed, mutant monkey with switchblades for claws only feet away. They get a solid “Ruuuun!”

The wolf mutts are a weapon used by the Gamemakers near the end of “The Hunger Games.” They are a nightmare-inducing mix of wolf and human. Being large creatures that run fast, jump high, and have four-inch long razor-sharp claws would be enough to turn most people’s knees to jelly, but the real kicker is they look like previously deceased tributes. *shudder*

Battling beasts becomes much tougher when they stare back at you with the very human eyes of dead friends. Best to completely avoid them and “Ruuuuun!”

These abominations from “Mockingjay” are a mixture of reptile and human. They have sharp talons, smell like President Snow (roses and blood), and hiss Katniss’s name. But worst of all, they have jutting jaws that allow them to decapitate victims in one bite.

They are a true horror show, and there is not enough space for all the ‘u’s needed in this particular “RUUUUUUN!!”