To start this I want to say that the glee fandom is here to stay. But I would be lying if I said I wan't down. I confined in my friend who has barely watched the last to seasons and have only watched it off and on and at work (she works at a group home for adults with learning and mental disabilities). This season she saw the premiere (with me at the hospital) and handful of episodes. She was symptomatic but not exactly supportive. Her husband teased me.

I'm not devastated only because of the show being on life-support. I am depressed though. Glee fandom has been dying go onto any fan section. A fanart page I follow has been discontinued it's still up but no new content will ever be posted. Fanfiction.net has more unfinished glee stories most of which probably aren't ever going to be finished. I have a feeling that I will go through some of the same withdraws that I went through with Harry Potter when the last movie ended. The glee fandom is much much smaller. The few of us left will have to band together to fight the void that will set in with glee being over. The empty feeling is there and will go away after awhile but this will be a hell lot worse then the Break Up was and there is little hope it'll go away as quickly.

Glee and the fandom was there for the hardest year of my 25 years. Glee and it's fandom are what helped me through it. I came out. I lost my dad. Brittana broke up. I lost faith in the church I grew up in. The year before I lost a sister (my brother got divorced). My fiance broke up with me (funny he was the one who got me into glee.) There have been 3 fandoms that have changed my life to the point where removing it will atter everything about me: Pokemon, The X Files and Glee. Pokemon is responsible for my love for video games. The X Files was what brought Alyssa (my BFF for 13 years) on the same page when she was friends with some of my bullies.

Glee is responsible for me stepping out of the closet or realizing I was in the closet at all. It expanded my music when I used to only listen to country, Classic rock and 80's pop. It's weird that I was borderline homophobic in 2006. I didn't support it either way, kinda like out of sight out of mind, I never spoke about it but it made me uncomfortable. I was a 16 year old, sheltered, naive Jesus freak. I didn't know it was an option (to be with someone of the same sex) until jr. high. I had crushes and didn't know it. I didn't understand why I couldn't swoon over the popular boy bands, I didn't even know their names. I didn't know I was different. Glee brought those questions to light. It made me smile when I had problems smiling. Everyone in my class of 2008 have college degrees and babies. I will never have a baby. I can't return to school without extreme dedication all because of my health. Glee is like a storybook for me a place to run to where I can forget about my problems and everything else wrong with the world. It's a 'Neverland', where my biggest worry is my favorite ships getting or staying together.

Glee is over...but we will be alright. I'm not ready to say goodbye yet, I may never be ready.

-Amanda of Texoma (piperlovegood)