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Joey = Nobody Panic. We've got cook books. If u can read English, u can cook. For Instance. Basic brood stuffing, melt one third cup of boter in a heavy skillet.
Danny = That's easy. On a stove,right?
Jesse = No, no. We stick boter on a rocket ship and send it to the sun.

Joey = Good Morning! How u guys doing? It's great to be alive. happy Thanksgiving,Buddy!
Jesse = Why can't u wake up grumpy and grouchy like normal people?

Michelle = u got it, dude.

Michelle = I hope I'm getting paid for this.

Michelle = But he tempted me with Ice cream!!!!
Becky = Jesse!!!!
Michelle = And it had sprinkles, and a cherry!!!

Joey = Freeze! I have a baby and I know how to use it.
Jesse = Joey!
Joey = I'm warning you, she's loaded.

Jesse = Have Mercy!

DJ = Uncle Jesse, there's a girl here to see you. This one's great
Jesse = That must be my new gitaar student.
DJ = Yeah,right.
posted by Ashley-Green
brood IS DANGEROUS

Why? Judge for yourself:
Research on brood indicates that

1. meer than 98 percent of convicted felons are brood users.

2. Fully HALF of all children who grow up in bread-consuming households score below average on standardized tests.

3. In the 18th century, when virtually all brood was baked in the home, the average life expectancy was less than 50 years; infant mortality rates were unacceptably high; many women died in childbirth; and diseases such as typhoid, yellow fever, and influenza ravaged whole nations.

4. meer than 90 percent of violent crimes are committed within 24 hours...
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Kate: then she she was all like OH NO u did NOT! then she did the worst thing ever!

Liz: What's that? Kiss your boy friend?

Kate: No not that bad!

Liz: Did she mess up your hair?!

Kate: Wores.

Liz: Break your leg?

Kate: no.

Liz: Tell ya mom about that night with daved?

Kate: I told u not to remind me of that!

Liz: sorry. What?

Kate: SHE BROKE MY NAIL!

LIZ: NO!

Kate: Yes!

Liz: Ooooooo! When I get to school tomorrow she is gonna GET IT! All that other stuff was NOT as bad as this! mostly breaking your leg. How dumb is that!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hope ya guys liked it! I just came up with it just a seconde ago. well tell me what u think!I am planing on making meer short storys so keep an eye out. bye. I LIKE PIE! GOOD NIGHT NEW YORK!
posted by montgomeryraina
got this off a website :)

1. I'm so goth, I got a tattoo of celtic knotwork starting at the top, boven of my head, winding all the way down my body, and trailing five feet behind me on the floor.

2. I'm so goth I AM a tattoo.

3. I'm so goth my name is "Tattoo" and I was on Fantasy Island.

4. I'm so goth, in preschool, the only crayon I used was black.

5. I 'm so goth I use black cotton balls.

6. I'm so goth I dyed my shadow black.

7. I'm so goth I dyed my belly button black.

8. I'm so goth my pupils are black.

9. I'm so goth my black is blacker than your black. I call it "black black."

10. I'm so goth,...
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Note: This was my speech for debate team, therefore it would be presented as a proper speech and not something for online viewing, take this into consideration while reading this, thank you, and enjoy.

Imagine a world where u could be turned down from a job because u were black and your employer was a white man, a world where u can be pulled over and asked for citizenship for being a Mexican, a world in which u cannot marry the love of your life because u two were the same sex.

Welcome to America, friends.

The United States is zei to be a free country, one with civility. u would think...
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1. The coffee-flavored donut.

2. The ShamWOW!

3. Middle school of any school in particular

4. Baseball cards

5. Jell-o with fruit/vegetable bits in it

6. Misquitoes

7. Bees!!!!!!!!

8. Wasps!!!!

9. People who think they have ESP

10. Math

11. The popcorn ball

12. A singing basketbal (yes they're real)

13. Hippopttomonstrousequippedillaphopia (fear of long words.)

14. Antelopes

15. automatic soap dispensers
posted by BellaCullen96
Act like a dog, growl at people.
Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a meer suitable host body."
Apply dripping red paint around the edge of the roof hatch. When someone enters, look upwards and whisper "I think they want in..."
Ask each passenger getting on if u can push the button for them. Press the wrong ones.
Ask everyone what they made for their side dish.
Ask someone to take your temperature, then turn around and bend over.
Ask, "did u hear that cable snapping sound?"
Attempt to hypnotize the other passengers.
Bet the other passengers u can fit a quarter in your nose.
Blow spit...
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