Twilight Series Club
kom bij
Fanpop
New Post
Explore Fanpop
 The wolf clan was kinda awesome, except for the crappy animatie and the fact that they're allergic to shirts.
The wolf clan was kinda awesome, except for the crappy animation and the fact that they're allergic to shirts.
Okay, I'll admit that I haven't laughed this hard at a film since I saw The Hangover last summer. Seriously, what was the plot here? I actually found the first film to be much better than this travesty. u can find my review of the first movie link. I'll go through it like I do with all movies. Pros and cons, then an overall.

Pros

The Volturi

Finally! Some ACTUAL vampires!! The Volturi I found were pretty awesome because, u know, they actually were cruel, soulless, mean, and did some actual VAMPIRING. The part towards the end where a tour group of humans is led directly to them and u hear their screams was pretty awesome. Come on people, that's what vampires do. They drink the blood of huuumans. Sheesh. Also, they were pretty cruel too, what with the whole slaan, smack down of Edward and nearly killing Bella (so bummed that didn't happen). Getting a small glimpse of the actor who will be playing Grindelwald in Deathly Hallows was a nice bonus too. So for all u Twilight fans, the Volturi are GOOD examples of vampires. Much like the soulless vampires on Buffy.

The wolf Clan

Now why I didn't particularly enjoy the crappy computer animatie of the wolves (more on that later) I did enjoy the characters of the wolf clan. The one scene that I really liked is where we see Sam's fiance, with half her face clawed up. My friend and I definitely agree that even with the claw marks she was amazingly beautiful. I would see a movie about her and Sam in a heartbeat. It would be much much better than this terrible film. Pity they were stuck in it.

Jacob

Lautner got hot. No denying that. Other than the hotness factor though, he was probably the only real character with any dimensions and depth besides Bella's father. The way their relationship built to where Jacob fell for Bella, and she pretty much for him, was very realistic and healthy. So u can imagine my dissappointment when she chose Edward, who abandoned, controlled, and basically led to much of her depression, over Jacob. u Team Jacob fans, I now consider u semi-sane because u recognized a HEALTHY relationship. complimenten to u guys.


Cons

Bella...you there?

I hate the character of Bella, I truly do. She doesn't think for herself, is defined solely door her relationships, and for some reason Stewart could NEVER SHUT HER MOUTH. Even when she wasn't talking!! What was up with that?! Gaah. The fact too that she dissed her vrienden at school and put her dad through so much crap with the screaming at night (seriously, wtf, she doesn't have PTSD) made me just loathe her character even meer with a passion. Furthermore, her whole obsession over age was just ridiculous. Ohhh nooo you're a whole jaar older than your 107 jaar old vampire boyfriend!! Now he's not going to love u anymore!!! Yea, stupid. Those fans out there that idolize her, please find a healthier role model such as Eowyn, Hermione, heck even Lily on How I Met Your Mother. Bella is a very unhealthy and psychologically unstable character and is an insult to females everywhere. She didn't even drive her own car most of the time! Disgusting.

How is she special too btw?

If someone can explain how Bella is unaffected door any of the vampire's powers, it'd be much appreciated. That just seems like something that's just thrown out there. My theory? It's because Bella has no thoughts!

Edward...dude wtf?!

Sooo this guy that supposedly is totally in love with u throws u into a glass tafel, tabel for protection, lies to you, breaks up with you, and abandons u in the forest. A car ride home pagina would have been nice plskthnx. Also, the throwing into the glass tafel, tabel for her protection? That was totally safe. u know, because she was bleeding even meer profusely after the tafel, tabel than she was after the papercut. Also, who has ever bled that much after a papercut anyways, if at all? Furthermore, the fact that he kept "appearing" everytime Bella had an adrenaline rush was just weird. I think if my ex-boyfriend started tonen up everytime I had a rush, I'd go and get a CT of my brain to make sure I didn't have a brain tumor a la Izzie seeing Denny b/c of her tumor. Also, the fact that Bella takes him right back after all the crap he put her through was just great. Really shows girls that hey, after a guy lies to u like that u can totally trust him again with no really good explanation other than "I love you". Nice.

OMG a Plot Point!!!

Annd what was the plot?? Everytime a possible plot point appeared it seemed to get derailed, such as the shots of Victoria, Laurent, of whenever anyone zei Bella was acting crazy. If anyone spoke reason of a plot point appeared, it did not toon again.

Lupin's wolf Looked Better...

The film must have had the world's worst computer animatie department because those wolves were a travesty. How about those transf...I mean FURSPLOSIONS eh? Really bad animatie coupled with a laughable transformation sequence (FURSPLODE!) led to even meer laughs. Too bad there weren't enough fursplosions.

That's What She Said!

There were way too many lines in the film where one could easily say that. For example- Bella: I'm coming! Me: That's what she said! Edward: I don't want u to come! Me: That's what HE said!! If u don't get the meaning behind that, then please go watch The Office where it is regularly utilized. Furthermore, the scene where Edward kisses Bella in front of her truck after the party was too funny. Edward acted like...well like link SNL skit. Please be forewarned that that link is meant for those 16 and older. That scene probably got one of the biggest laughs out of me.

Blocked

Finally, all the kiss-blocking that poor Jacob suffered through. Face stempel, punch high school guy who threw up at an action movie (he's so gay then), Bella denies, and Edward calls just as he macks on the upper lip! Seriously, Jacob should have just pulled an Owen (Grey's Anatomy character), grabbed Bella, and just rocked her world. Doubt she woulda left if he did that.


Overall

Overall, this movie was a travesty to the film community. It was plotless, very poorly acted, and featured a very unhealthy set of characters that girls and women alike should not look up to as role models. Bella should have been thrown in a psych center for the stuff she was experiencing. I'm not going to apologize either if I've offended anyone. This is my honest opinion, and I know I wasn't as kind as I was in my first review. Now you've heard an opinion of an anti-Twilighter. u Team Jacobers, u got some respect from me now. Please save your brain cells and your money and do not see this movie. Unless u want a really good laugh then door all means do. Oh and one meer thing to note. The ending with the whole Marry me? Ending on the *gasp* garnered a huge laugh from our audience. And just for my own satisfaction, FURSPLODE TIME!!
 No plot and many opportunities for "That's what she said!" abound in this film. Also, Edward during this kiss is very reminiscent of a certain SNL skit.
No plot and many opportunities for "That's what she said!" abound in this film. Also, Edward during this kiss is very reminiscent of a certain SNL skit.
 Poor Jacob kept getting blocked and denied. In the end, Bella chooses the unhealthy relationship with Edward based on looks rather than the healthy one with Jacob based on the initial strong friendship.
Poor Jacob kept getting blocked and denied. In the end, Bella chooses the unhealthy relationship with Edward based on looks rather than the healthy one with Jacob based on the initial strong friendship.
posted by EnchantdEquinox
Enchanted Equinox
Chapter 1: Silver Raindrops.
The glass was cold against her palms, as Renesmee pressed them to the window. Rain poured down outside, running like a waterfall across the outside glass. It was cold, but she didn’t want cold. The house was empty; of course they were out playing baseball. Even her mother had gone, though Renesmee knew she would only be umpire. Bella still had no interest in sports. But they had left her there, all alone, to shiver in the cold Cullen house. She was supposed to be asleep. It was a school night but the booming thunder and the aching cold had kept...
continue reading...
Jane's POV
Me and the others quickly approched Forks hospital, I looked around. Then i spun around a nodded. The others took off going around back. I walked to the front, I held a single gun. But i knew I didnt need it! *giggle*

Renesme lay in pain on the rock hard hospital. She moaned in pain. "It's ok" Jacob zei softly. *Screaming in distince* "What...was that?" Bella inqiured.Edward shook his head. For he didnt know. *gunshots* Bella and Edward stood up, frightened. "Edward go check whats happining,I'll call Alice and the others ok?" Edward agreed and ran out the room. Bella quickly dialed her other family member's. On the other line, Alice and the whole family listened. "Well be there in 5 miniutes!" Shouted Alice into the phone. 5 minuten later, the rest of the cullens arrived, rushing to a certain room, with a certain girl crying out in pain.
Jacob's POV

Renesme lay asleep in the hospital bed volgende to me. Me and Bella took her to the hospital, a little after she threw up 3 times. I rested my hand on her forehead stroking her beutifual pale face. Her eyelash's fluttered, then her eyes slowly inched open. "Mmm? Jacob...?" She faintly asked. "Yeah, babe?" "....I love you" She smiled touched my face with her small hand, reached up and pecked me on my lips. Then she closed her eyes and fell asleep.

7:28 P.M Renesme's POV
"Ah, Miss renesme, so nice to see u all grown up!" Chimed Jane. "Huh? Who are...you?" I asked quitley. "Jane, member...
continue reading...
posted by karlygirl26
Chapter 2)

When we arrived at my house Charlie, my dad, was home. I slumped my book bag over my shoulder and climbed out of the truck. “I love you,” Edward whispered. “Love you.” I zei back to him walking away. He got out of my truck and disappeared into the woods. I looked back at him but he was already gone. I walked inside the house to Charlie, who already ordered pizza and was watching ESPEN. I threw myself onto the divan, bank and Charlie looked up from the TV. “Bells? What’s wrong?”

I spoke into the divan, bank pillow. “Edward and his family are going away for a while and they don’t...
continue reading...
Bella's POV

When me and edward arrived home pagina we of edward was shocked to see that Ness and Jacob were cuddled up. "That filfthy bastard, hopefully he didnt touch her" Edward growled. "Hunny calm down, there in love its okay!" I zei carefully. "It's not okay if they..." "If they what? have a baby of do adult stuff?" He nodded, I sighed. I then walked up stairs hopeing to get in bed. Edward sighed and joined me.
6:00 AM
Renesme's POV
I awoke suddenly, i sat up and looked around I was on the divan, bank with jacob.... Oh! thats right we slept toghter. I thought. "Why did I just wake up?" I quitley whispered???...
continue reading...
Two hours to go... 1 uur to go... 50 minutes... 45 minutes. I was starting to get sick of waiting. Why couldn't time verplaats faster? Edward, my boyfriend, had promised to pick me up 10 o clock. Okay, wrong choice of word. the word boyfriend doesn't really illustrate enough of my eternal commitment for Edward, but it's the closest I can get without sounding stupid. Anyway, it was New Years Eve and Edward and I were going to spend the last few hours of the jaar concentrating on being together. Then we were going somewhere special to see the New jaar in. That's all Edward would tell me. The rest...
continue reading...
posted by mmourer
We drove for a few minuten not talking. When we arrived at his house I was shocked that it was so big. It was 3 stories tall and white, but mostly made of reflective glass so u couldn’t see inside. Off of the house was a 3 door garage. Passed there was a wide river with a bridge going over it. On the other side of the river their was acres of green gras like a meadow. Just passed the meadow there was a forest that had mountains behind it. I was mesmerized door it. I was also kind of jealous door it. I parked the car and looked at Chris he was smiling. I looked at the scenery a little more...
continue reading...
please leave commentaren so i no if this story sucks of not and please read it even if its not the whole story.

Chapter 1: The unexpected

Have u ever had one of those dreams, were u try and run fast but u just keep getting slower, well that's the dream I was having. This is the most strangest dream I have ever had. I was being chased door two wannabe snobs from school, Rachel was the leader from between them, who was tall with black hair tied up in to a curly mini style afro like a thick puff ball at the back of her head. she also had long, sleek legs built for running. Along side her was her...
continue reading...
I do not own any of the characters except Amelia and Elizabeth. I do not own the Twilight Saga.

Alice:

Yay! Rosalie, Bella and Elizabeth have arrived and Jacob is out on his little party. Bella bought wine and we had some of that. I tried not to get too drunk, but i couldn't help. It wasn't actually wine, it was blood. We did each others nails and i showed everyone my dress. Rosalie is doing my hair tomorrow and Bella is doing my make-up.

Next Day:

Ahhhh!!!!! I'm getting married! Yes! I got Amelia ready because she is my bloem Girl. I went to Rose's house and she done my hair and i got dressed...
continue reading...
door Twilight_News |
According to MTV:

“Taylor Lautner and Kristen Stewart are among the first to bevestig that they’ll be attending, making the pair a recurring feature on the red carpet (remember their adorable joint presentation of a “scary movie”-themed feature at last year’s Academy Awards?), and they’ll be in good company with a host of other celebs including Zac Efron, Taylor Swift, Emma Roberts, Leighton Meester, and Mila Kunis. ”

Other beroemdheden tend to walk the red carpet, so be on the lookout for meer names to be at the toon on January 5th. Twilight was up for a ton of awards, expect Taylor and Kristen to pick up a few as well as possibly be presenters.

u can also catch live Red Carpet coverage on @Ustream at 4:30pm PT / 7:30pm ET on Jan 5! link
posted by karpach_14
jake sat door me and held my hand. Not like a friend, but maybe more. What am I thinking, I just broke up. This is insane. My life is like being written, everything is changed all the time, first u think something is going to last, and then it changes its weird, but I cant change it. of can i?
“ness u act like It was just a joke” my mother told me.
“it was a joke I was just getting too attached to it that’s all, I should have known that something so nice couldn’t be real, but I guess time will pass and I will get used to it, right jake?” I asked him and smiled at him. he looked...
continue reading...
posted by karpach_14
 nessies outfit
nessies outfit
"hi guys, whacha talking about?" i asked them. they turned toward me and Jake smiled. he was door my side in a sec. he grabbed me and swang me aroung.
"Y havent u visited me for so long?" jake asked playfully.
"family problems" i answered. before Jake of anyone else could say something, Eric comes out of the woods.
"what are u doing here?" jake asks Eric with a tilt of anger in his voice.
"can't i see my imprintee?" he asked jake. seth embry, jared, paul, quil, and sam widend their eyes.
"whats wrong ?" i asked sam.
"only one person can imprnt on you, if there's two they have to fight, and only...
continue reading...
posted by karpach_14
"who is it?" eric asked. this cant be any worse ur alone with a guy at a hotel and ur family pops up thinking who knows what.
"grandpa Carlisle i told only mom" i whispered to him.
"i didnt want to tell them, but edward read my mind" he told me. i couldnt believe it.
"dad stop reading peoples mind" i told him, i wasnt as mad with him as i was before.
"ooo a movie sweet... excuse me let me through" emmett zei and went o watch avatar.
"ooo popcorn" he practically shouted and i rolled my eyes.
"i've missed u so much" aunt alice squealed.
"me too" and she hugged me.
"then y dont u come home?" she asked...
continue reading...
posted by karpach_14
"um eric,, i think im going to go to class talk to u after school" i told him and kissed him on his cheek. when i entered the class i sat in my zitplaats, stoel and waited till class started. then a girl comes up to me.
"hey new girl back off of eric" she said
"y should i its not like u can make me" i told her and i smiled.
"oh i can i'll tell him something that he should know bout u"
"like wat?, i dont keep secrets from him"
"trust me theres something he doesnt know"
"go ahead its not like im scared of u, trust theres nothing that can make me leave him"
"he's gonna leave u"
"whatever" i told her and i turned...
continue reading...
posted by karpach_14
Chapter 4
At the airport Carlisle came to pick us up this time. Aunt alice ran to Carlisle and came his a hug. Me Emmett and Rosalie were walking slowly just to get on alice’s nerves. Carlisle came up to me.
“how was ur vacation nessie?” carlisel aske me before I could answer alice answered first.
“she looked sick to me all the time, the only thing she did was sit in the house and do her work, Carlisle I think u need to check her” alice said
“really?” Carlisle aske me
“grandpa Carlisle I feel fine” I lied, I got a huge headache, I felt dizzy and everything went black. Then the...
continue reading...
posted by teamalice_0
So soory its been a looong time its annoying but my computer is fixe WOOOOOOOO!!!!
-teamalice_0
==================================================

I didnt sleep well after hearing the person of whatever it was that was in my room. Creeped me out. I wondered how they got in anyways. 1.Living with a cop, great deterrence.2. Every knew he has plently of guns.3 We live in a 2 story house, its hard to get into a two story room without a sound. 3. We got an alarm system on the entire bottom floor.4 Im a lightsleeper, ever since I went blind my hearing got so much better, how I didnt notice them earlier...
continue reading...
posted by groovychicklisa
Edward I.......

“I don’t know what u want me to say to that? u have no idea how much I want to stay with you! But I don’t think I can – we aren’t good for each other we've both hurt each other to much! If anything were to happen to u be it my fault of not I don't know if I could go on.” I stuttered trying to hold back my tears.
“Bella I don't think u understand how much I need u in my life! I was never the boy who wanted to settle down and get married and now I'm 18 and I want all that! But not just with anyone I want it with you! Do u remember when we were kids, before...
continue reading...
posted by IluvjacobOk
Bella:Oh Emmett!!______________________ edward:emmett she mine!!! Jelous.14:18Bella: exCUUUZE me edward i olredy CHOZE emmett.14:19Edward: go off crieing somewhere.14:20Emmett: wait ur not edward!Pulze of maskUr MARCUS.14:22Marcus:is not pulze off mask I'm jane.14:23Bella: No ur not pulze of mask ur VICTORIA.14:25Victoria: No I'm not pulze off mask I'm Bella.14:27Bella 1: If ur bella. Then i'm *pulze of mask Renesmee?? I don't think she's born yet. i juz came here?.14:28Emmett: let's test who the real Bella!!KISS ME!.14:29Both bella's: OK :-D *thinkin' <3 <3 <3*.14:31Emmett:Ok eat some worm .14:32Both bella's: Ok :-Deating worms.14:33Emmett:Punch me.14:34Bella 1: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!Bella 2: no. yes, no yes_____________.14:39emmett:Bella one is the real bella pluze off mask ur James_________________James: u got me I'm back from the dead to kill...Oh danm ur a vampire!!.14:41Renesmee: Ooooohhh he's cute.Bella 1 eeeww End
Edwards pov
There was something about her; that made me feel different. When we are parteners in everything; she hates it. I think she is hiding the fact that secretly she likes it. I am Edward Cullen and I am parterners with Bella zwaan-, zwaan for everything. She isn't so bad. But today; she lost it, when the teacher zei these words...

(Drama teacher) "As u know; there will be a play soon. It's going to be Romeo and Juilet. We decided that this jaar the roles go to... Bella and Edward." She smiled. Bella groaned. I don't really understand her problem. I am nice to her; when we work together. (And...
continue reading...
posted by uniquezandy
Bellas pov
Why must he do this to me? Torture me one minute; then acts like he is in love with me and treats me nice and speaks gentle. It just doesn't make sense. I hope it wasn't an act. He is hard to figure out.I just wish he could tell me how he feels. But he is my master and I have to keep it strictly proffesional.

Today; (after the chores,) I decided to roam around the gardens. It was beautiful. There were roses, fountains and a lot of greenery. I found a copie of a book to read, as I sat upon a stone bench. It was comfortable and I was happy; but not for long. "Hello Isabella." I looked...
continue reading...