Lucas - Brooke, I..."
Brooke - "We have a naked me in the hot tub."
[BROOKE looks back over at HALEY as NATHAN nods at her]
BROOKE: Did u see that?
PEYTON: What?
BROOKE: Nathan just gave her the nod.
PEYTON: What nod?
BROOKE: The "lets hook up after the game" nod. [Pause] Wanna know what I think? I think Nathan likes tutor girl. But I think tutor girl likes Lucas. And I know I like Lucas. And I don't know who the hell u like anymore. This is all turning into one big love… rectangle plus one, whatever that is.
Brooke - "Jake u can tell me. I won't even remember it in the morning."
Jake - "You really wanna know?" leaning closer to Brooke's ear. "The truth would kill your buzz."
Brooke:What's your idea of your perfect date?
Haley:You getting hit door a bus.
Brooke:Nathan's lucky with that sense of humor.
Lucas: Look Haley, can I tell u something?
Brooke(literally bouncing into the room): hallo boyfriend. hallo Tutor girl.
Haley: hallo Tigger
Brooke (talking about Lucas): He's so serious, I thought I'd lighten him up a little
Karen: And u couldn't take him to a comdey?
Brooke: I guess you're not a big fan of tatoos then.
Karen: No, not on my son.
Brooke: I think I could light my self on brand and my mother wouldn't notice, so sometimes it's hard for me to remember some moms would.
Brooke:(while watching Lucas' letter burn)I hope it wasn't money.
BROOKE: (v.o) Someone once said; it's the good girls who keep diaries. The bad girls never have the time. Me… I just wanna live a life I'm gonna remember. Even if I don't write it down
Brooke: why do bad guys lie to get into your bed, and good guys lie to get into youre heart
Brooke: Yes. "Vote Brooke for president." It gets straight to the point and short enough for even the stoners to remember.
Brooke: I haven't stuffed since I started puberty.
BROOKE: How many moments in your life can u point to and say, "That's when it all changed"? u just had one. Don't worry, baby. The popularity thing's not so bad.
PEYTON: The Brooke Davis Leopard Bra? Dude, that thing's like a welcome mat. Anyway, I heard u were naked in his car.
BROOKE: No, I was partially naked. At one point I had mittens on 'cause it was cold.
HALEY: u know, I’m just not clear on this. So the douche at your house is broken and u had to have Felix come all the way over here and use mine?
ANNA: Um…
BROOKE: Uh-huh.
PEYTON: Brooke!
HALEY: Wait a second. Y-you don’t have a bed do you? Did you… tell me u didn’t have sex in my bed. Brooke.
BROOKE: I’m already washing your sheets.
HALEY: Oh my god! Ugh! Brooke! Ugh!
BROOKE: They already yelled at me, what is the big deal?!
HALEY: The big deal is that first of all; u did not thank me for helping u with the CDs. seconde of all; u had sex IN MY BED! And third; u ate all the brownies.
ANNA: Actually, I had a couple.
HALEY: That’s not the point.
BROOKE: Haley’s right. The point is that I’ve been deceptive. It’s not so much that I lied to anyone’s face. It’s meer about what I didn’t say.
HALEY: Ugh! OK. There is a big difference between a lie and a little white lie.
BROOKE: Really!
HALEY: Yeah!
PEYTON: OK, wait, what white lie?
HALEY: Nothing!
BROOKE: Haley lied to Nathan!!
HALEY: Not exactly!
BROOKE: Yes u did!
PEYTON: About what?!
HALEY: Nothing.
PEYTON: Haley.
HALEY: u know what, if we’re talking about bad behaviour, u might wanna sit this one out!
PEYTON: What is that supposed to mean?
HALEY: That’s supposed to mean that Peyton’s the one u should be looking at, not me.
BROOKE: Why?! She not the one acting like a perfect little Stepford wife!
HALEY: Uh!
ANNA: Why are u picking on Haley? She’s throwing us a slumber party.
BROOKE: Actually, she was throwing us a slumber party, u just butted in!
PEYTON: Brooke! LEAVE HER ALONE!
BROOKE: WHY!?
HALEY: What’re u gonna do? Snort her?
HALEY: Listen, I didn’t throw this slumber party for you, u threw it for yourself and u know it!
BROOKE: Well, at least I didn’t lie to my husband about hanging out with Chris!
PEYTON: WOAH!!
HALEY: Brooke! Well… Peyton did cocaine with that Rick guy!
PEYTON: Haley!
BROOKE: WHAT!!
PEYTON: u had sex in her bed!
ANNA: OK –
BROOKE: WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!? CRACK ****!!
PEYTON: ****!
BROOKE: LIAR!!
(Haley rips Brooke’s nose strip off)
ANNA: Man… boom Hill’s got some drama
Brooke (to Anna): Hi… I’m Brooke. We haven’t officially been introduced, but your dating my ex-boyfriend and I’m sleeping with your brother so it looks like we have a lot in common.
BROOKE: We should totally hang out more. What is your name?
HALEY: Haley…
BROOKE: Yeah. I don’t like that name. Lets call you… Brooke!
BROOKE: Hi friend!
PEYTON: Thanks.
HALEY: Sure. I’ll see u guys later.
PEYTON: Where’s your ride?
HALEY: Oh. I’m going to take the last fan bus back.
PEYTON: It just left.
BROOKE: That’s perfect. Brookie can come with us!
HALEY: Yeah, she named me Brooke.
BROOKE: Peyton, can she come? Please? Peyton, please!
PEYTON: Just don’t touch the stereo. of we’ll have a problem.
BROOKE: Road trip.
BROOKE: We’re going on a road trip. We’re going on a road trip.
[THE CAR driving along a road. BROOKE’S hitting PEYTON with her pompoms as PEYTON tries to drive]
PEYTON: Brooke! Come on…
[BROOKE throws the pompoms out the window, giggling and clapping. Then she leans over the front seat, looking at HALEY and then PEYTON]
BROOKE: Don’t u two like the same guys? of guy, of something?
HALEY: I’m just tutoring him, that’s all.
PEYTON: So you’re not into him? Because he seems to be into you.
[BROOKE’S looking out the back window]
BROOKE: He gave her the nod!
PEYTON: Just be careful.
HALEY: Well, what about u and Lucas?
PEYTON: What about us?
HALEY: Oh, come on. Tortured artist meets tortured athlete? Talk about your obvious attraction.
[The car beeps to signal lack of gas]
BROOKE: I hear birds.
PEYTON: Unbelievable! Brooke, did u not think to put gas in the car?
[BROOKE looks at HALEY]
BROOKE: Answer the question, Brooke.
[The car stops]
BROOKE: Why are we stopping?
[BROOKE’S CAR. PEYTON gets out of the phone with her cell]
PEYTON: There’s still no signal. Who lives like this?
HALEY: Pop the trunk, will you?
BROOKE: Peyton, don’t listen to it. It might be a trick.
[PEYTON pops the romp, kofferbak and HALEY looks inside]
HALEY: Yeah, it’s empty. I saw a gas station a few miles back. If I’m not back in an hour, tell my mom I loved her?
BROOKE: Don’t u mean Nathan?
PEYTON: I’ll go with you.
BROOKE: What about me?
[BROOKE’S back in the car and PEYTON locks the doors. As BROOKE and HALEY walk away, BROOKE’S yelling]
BROOKE: I could suffocate in here. Guys!
HALEY: u did crack a window, right?
BROOKE: Guys! Come on! I’m scared! Please! Come on, u guys. Don’t go! Someone will come!
[PEYTON and HALEY walk off]
Shot of a bag in a glass display case. Brooke pops up from the other end looking sulky.)
BROOKE: But I want it so bad!
(Haley pulls her away and linken arms with her.)
HALEY: No. It’s not in the budget. Besides, if u get the purse, then u can’t afford the outfit for the opening.
BROOKE: Screw the opening. I’ll stay at home pagina with the purse.
(Haley looks at Brooke worriedly, she seem to be dozing off.)
HALEY: What’s going on, u alright?
BROOKE: Yeah, I just feel a little light headed.
HALEY: Why?
BROOKE: I…sold some stuff.
HALEY: What stuff?
BROOKE: Some…blood.
HALEY: Blood!? u sold blood? Brooke, u really think that’s a good idea? u actually don’t look very well. Kinda… pasty.
BROOKE: I’m discount shopping! I’m gonna have to get used to looking like crap. And besides, I needed some extra money for the dress.
HALEY: Which is only thirty-six bucks.
BROOKE: Shoes.
HALEY: Eighteen dollars.
BROOKE: Eyeliner to go with the shoes.
HALEY: Seven fifty, which is what? Sixty-one fifty with tax. I mean please, u have plenty left over for-
BROOKE: Alcohol! We’ll stop door the liquor store on the way home.
HALEY: I really don’t think u should be drinking after u just gave blood.
BROOKE: No! The woman told me to re-hydrate myself and besides, if I’m gonna be seen in these shoes, I’m gonna need a drink of two.
Brooke: I thought I knew you. But I guess it’s easier to see what we want than to look for the truth. u think u know me, but u don’t, and that means u don’t know what I can do. u see me as someone who is populair and has all the answers. That’s not true. I may not always know what I am doing, but I’ll try to make things better. And when I make a mistake, because face it we all do, I promise I’ll ask for your help. I can’t do this alone, but if you’ll take a chance on me, we can do great things together. I promise if u believe me I’ll find the courage to reach for your every dream. JFK zei that courage of life is a magnificent mixture of triumph and tragedy, a man does what he must in spite of personal consequences, in spite of obstacles and dangers and pressures and that is the basis of all morality.
Brooke: Eww. u two realize you’re related, right?
Nathan: Hi Brooke.
Brooke: Double eww if Tutor Wife is here.
Lucas: She’s not. What’s up?
Brooke: Umm, my car is now out of commission, thanks to my jealous spiteful stain of a neighbour, and I was sort of thinking that u might want to walk to school together. Unless of course your waiting for your boy toy here.
(Haley and Nathan walk up)
Brooke: Oh, look. It’s our very own Britney Spears and… whoever she married this week. I have a vraag for u guys. What do u think, roze booties, of blue?
Haley: Booties? Brooke, I’m not pregnant.
Brooke: No. The only way this isn’t totally screwed up is if your knocked up, but don’t worry. Your secret’s veilig with me.
Tim: What’s this lame-ass joke about u guys getting married?
Peyton: He’s in shock now that you’re officially off the market.
Brooke: It’s true Dim. Haley’s preggers.
Haley: Brooke!
Tim: Right. And Lucas moved away. u guys gotta do better if your gonna get one over on the Tim.
Haley: The Tim. (laughs)
Brooke: Okay, for future reference, driving a converteerbaar, cabriolet filled with inflated rubbers, not smart!
Lucas: Helium condoms?
Brooke: If she’s pregnant, it’s a reminder, if she’s not, it’s a reminder. It’s cute. hallo Mouth, how’s your bod?
Mouth: Skinny.
Lucas: u know Skillz and Fergie, right?
Brooke: Course I do. hallo guys. Do u know Peyton?
Skillz: What’s up, skinny girl?
Peyton: Hi.
Brooke: Peyton’s an 8.1 on LustFactor.
(Brooke takes a picture of Peyton’s chest)
Brooke: Soon to be a 9. u know, I was thinking, we can take the cameras, put them out on the tables, people can take pictures for the wedding wall.
Lucas: Nice.
Brooke: Care to know what else I have planned, I know u do! I have spray string, for when tutor girl and boy arrive, and Mouth, come here, sit.
(Brooke sits Mouth down in a spinning chair)
Peyton: What is that?
Brooke: This, missy blonde girl, is the Brooke Davis version of Spin the Bottle. Only this, is Spin the Body. (Brooke spins Mouth and it lands on Fergie) Okay, u two have to make out! And last but not least, we have 5 minuten in the elevator.
Lucas: I thought it was 5 minuten in the closet.
Brooke: Yeah, if your in junior high. But the great part about this is, u know how everybody has their elevator list?
Skillz: What?
Brooke: Your elevator list! Come on, the lijst of people your allowed to have sex with if your ever stuck in an elevator with them!
Skillz: Halle Berry.
Fergie: Beyonce.
Peyton: Jack Black.
Mouth: Brooke Davis.
Brooke: Well, everybody makes a lijst and if two people have each others names… five minuten in the elevator!
Lucas: Sounds like fun. Nice work Brooke.
Brooke: Thank you. Now all we need is a Nathan and a Haley.
(Brooke spins Mouth)
Mouth: (Pointing at Skillz) No. (Pointing at Brooke) Yes. (Pointing at Lucas) No. (Pointing at Peyton) Yes.
Brooke (to Felix after finding out he has a sister): u mean after they had u they rolled the dice and kept breeding? That’s risky.
Brooke: And to top, boven it all off, if my parents go broke, I might actually have to study to get into college.
Peyton: My God, the horror!
Brooke: I know. How the mighty have fallen.
Brooke: Okay. Theresa, terrible posture. Pinch that penny. Bevin, u need…a breath mint. Peyton. Nice form. And excellent betrayal of a best friend. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. u guys! This weekend is the Classic. It’s our biggest cheer competition. Aren’t u sick of Clair Young and beer Creek Warriors taking home pagina the trophy every year? Because I am. We need to get it together here and I’m not just talking about our routine. I’m talking hair, nails…underarms, Theresa.
BEVIN: Brooke, cheerleading is supposed to be fun.
BROOKE: Yeah? Well winning’s funner. And if u don’t like it u can go cheer for the wrestling team. Take five.
PEYTON: Okay, u know what? u hate me, I get it. Fine. Just don’t take it out on our squad.
BROOKE: Everything is not about you, Peyton. Did u ever think that maybe I’m being a psycho-hose-beast because I want us to do well this weekend? Those judges are not going to be as forgiving as I am.
PEYTON: Funny, I didn’t know u were forgiving at all.
Brooke: Lucas Scott betrayal train, all aboard.
(Brooke takes a picture of Peyton in the douche for LustFactor)
Brooke: We are going to get u a 10 yet!
(Haley walks in)
Haley: Hey, is Peyton around? She zei she was gonna loan me something to wear.
Brooke: Yeah, she’ll be out in a second.
Haley: Oh my God! Where did u get that picture of her?
Brooke: I got it off modern technology. It’s this free little project I’m doing to help expand her horizons.
Haley: door posting nude pictures of her on the Internet?
Brooke: Don’t worry, she’s gonna thank me once she sees the guys I’ve gotten lined up.
Haley (sees the picture of one): Oh, he’s cute. (sees another picture) Oh, really cute! (sees another picture) Oh, that’s what I’m talking about!
Brooke: Down girl. u can look at the menu all u want but from now on u eat at home.
Brooke: Guess who's in the lobby, I'll tell you. Claire Young and her little ho posse. We are going down there.
Peyton: Okay. And if an angry dance-off breaks out I got your back.
Brooke: Great. Just don't stick another mes in it.
BROOKE: I cannot believe the nerve of that little third rate Britney trying to pretend like she doesn’t recognize me.
PEYTON: Are u still obsessing over this? u made out with her boyfriend at camp.
BROOKE: I didn’t know they were dating, unlike some people. And besides he was a yell leader, he was gay anyway.
Brooke: It’s important to have somebody who can make u laugh, somebody u can trust, somebody that, u know, turns u on, and it’s really, really important that these 3 people don’t know each other!
