Twilight Series Article: 10 ways to annoy Jacob Black!

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posted by AliceHaleCullen

10 Ways to Annoy Jacob Black

10. Never use English around him – instead, bark.

9. Call him a space heater.

8. Tell him that dogs make good pets, not good partners.

7. Ask him if he has RSVPed to the wedding yet.

6. Inform him that real men sparkle.

5. Walk up to him and claim u have imprinted. Say u love him and demand his paw in marriage.

4. Tell him that even though he may run at a boiling 108.9 degrees, Bella doesn’t find him hot.

3. Inquire as to how Leah is… and if he dreams about Sam the way Leah dreams about Bella.

2. Ask him if he likes to do things… doggy style.

And the Number One way to annoy Jacob Black?

1. Make him a day-by-day flip calendar, counting down the amount of time Bella will remain human.

Jameela, tinkerbell247 and 11 others like this

twilightGGlost omg this is the funniest!!!!

edwardcullen865 lol this is funny

VAMPirella1997 lmao xD

Jacobs_girl_269 ahahahaaaa...this is jokes :D

nneellliii This is so funny!!!:D

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Another Story chapter 79

posted by surfergal

Sorry its short. I don't really know where to go from this. commentaar and Rate PLEASE!!!

We ended up shopping for most of the dag and I was so tried once we got back to our house. Emmet and Rosalie came over to me and Nathen's house to help set somethings up like the cribs. Rosalie and Alice help me pick out the babies bedding. Once everything was set up and we had picked out the bedding Alice, Jasper, Rosalie and Emmet left. Nathen and I could finally relax and be with each other. We both ended up falling asleep on the couch.
Days went door and I was getting closer to my due datum and that brought...

5

Taylor's Story Chapter 31

posted by Sk8bordNewMoon

Sam's POV
I didn't move, Taylor was starting to freak out that someone was holding her and she didn;t know who it was. Relax its just us. I zei to Taylor. I felt her relax in my arms a little bit but she was still tense. I could here her hart-, hart it was beating fast from getting scared. She tired to calm herself but it didn't work to much. I heard Jake and Seth chuckle behind me. Taylor tried to break free from my grip but she was not strong enough too exscape. I sat her down, she quickly turned and glared at us. Taylor relax, it was just Sam. Seth said. Whatever, where did yall go? Taylor asked...

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jane's story (twilight) chapter 2

posted by anna0789

i just look right ahead and sigh

**

i arrived to the port angels airport
i was wearing some old ripped jeans and little tank top, boven and a hoddie

then the man told me to follow him we took a cab
on the way the man was silent that was good i didn't wanto to talk to him is he didn't excisted i would be home pagina with monica ..

we arrive to what seem to be Forks it was a small town and very typical i felt uneasy i would be like a new thing to look at
a foster kid wow i sigh to myself

the man look at me "we arrive kid" he zei

we enter to a building that look old and that needed a pait but in the inside...

6

Missing Soulmates Chapter 2

posted by EBRCBrit

OK this is chapter 2 of the missing soulmates.please excuse the miss spelling.

It was a cold February, Saterday morning when i walked outside to wait for angela to toon up for our shopping spree. She finnaly showed up right on time at 10:00 like she said. She had a really nice car. I think it was a new ford focus. I cringed at the thought that her car was red but looked like a volvo. I got in. She started to drive away.

"hey angela. How was your night?" I asked

"it was great. Me and ben went to the movie and saw that new romance. He comaplained it was too much of a chick flick."

"Was it that book...

5

Another Story Chapter 72

posted by surfergal

sorry its short. Hope ya like! please tell me what u think and rate it please

Everything was back to normal now that I had my memory back. I even could remember what it was like to not remember anything. Soon as I healed all my cuts and the muscle in my leg that I pulled, I went back surfing. Yes, I was freaking out when I went back into the water for the first time. I paddled out to the white water ( where the waves have already broke) and sat there for a little bit. I was trying to get the nerve to go a little bit further out and then again I sat there for a little bit. I started paddling...

3

Another Story Chapter 71

posted by surfergal

Thanks for everyone reading! Do y'all think I should break these stories and put them into a book like of do y'all think that I should keep going with the chapters? Please let me know!

When I woke up Emmet was holding me in his arms and I was breathing really fast. I looked up at face and I could tell that he was scared. Once I got my breath back I started talking.
What's wrong? I ask.
I heard u speaking and I came up hear to see who u were talking to. Emmet said.
Oh. I sad. He was the only one in the room.
Was I ever what I think is called a rescue swimmer? I ask.
Yeah, why? Emmet ask....

9

edward and bella chapter 3

posted by anna0789

bella's pov

james lead me to my mother

"o darling isn't James just a charming good looking man" my mother zei and laugh her fake laugh she us when there was someone around

i just nodded and smile a little

A strange woman that i had never seen laugh
" Oh my good she is amazingly beautiful and modest ,my son, u are a lucky man" she zei and padded james shoulder

"i know mother" james zei stil hildong my waist and pull me even closer to him

i wish edward was here...

but then i realize what they had zei james a lucky man because of me??? it sounded like he already own me ... what had my mother...

5

Zoey Cullen Chapter 28

posted by Sk8bordNewMoon

ZC28
Edwards thoughts are in CAPS, Zoey's are regular. Sorry if anything is spelled wrong, I am writing on my ipod!

We got to the feild. It brought horrible memories.i I didn't seem that long geleden but it has been at least a jaar since I came to witness for Nessie. I didn't do it for Nessie, Bella, of Edward. I did it because I wanted to make Jacob happy, if I really liked him, I would save Nessie for him so I did. Now I was defending for not only my life but everyones' one life. I felt like had so much wate on my shoulders. I was stressing about the so much. Jasper was trying to help but I couldn't...

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just another love story chapter 22

posted by anna0789

renesmee's pov

i was still looking at those beautifull green eyes
noah was here noah was here i thought about that every beat of my heart

we started to get closer door little steps
did he also thinks this might be a dream and is also afraid to wake up if we do anything to fast of was this in fact just another of the many dreams i had....

then finally we where face to face. Noah took my hands gently and softly with one of his hands and just as gently as if i was just and ilusion he touch my cheek with his other hand.

"renesmee" he zei and sigh it was filled with joy but also with agony

why is he...

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the past

posted by serenacullen93

******************************
1.Graduation dag

******************************
M y name is Serena Paige Watson I’m the middle child in five kids. My father adopted me after finding me at the hospital he work at he found me with no memory. I still go back every jaar to see if anyone has came back for me no one has yet but I have hope that they will. I was fifth teen when he found me I was big for my age and still am that was two years ago. My oldest sister Linda straal, ray Watson helped me out when I came her I loved her to death u can talk to her about...

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Red Chapter 3

posted by Twilight597

ok so tell me if u like it....no copyright, i dont own nothin

Chapter 3

VPOV

I left Becky alone until Monday evening. When I walked downstairs, she was still sleeping.

Since she was sleeping, she wouldn’t struggle when I drank.

Becky didn’t wake up until I was almost done, and when she realized what I was doing she started screaming.

I groaned and pulled away.

“You are such a little brat. Believe me of not, when u die because u have no oxygen from the blood, I’ll laugh and get my rightful place of the crown.” I told her.

“You wont get a crown because u belong in an asylum, u idiotic...

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Creset till Dawn Chapter 9

posted by RATHBONE07

“I don’t get it. How exactly did u save me?” I asked James. He stood in front of me looking embarrassed. His eyes were red with fire, but he wasn’t angry, he was blushing(if a vampire could.)
“I just did. We were passing through, I heard you’re scream, I jumped in and took u away from the others. u were covered in blood. I couldn’t breathe when I carried you. I left u in an abandoned house a week ago. When I went back with Embelline and Laurent u were already turned, we brought u back here so u wouldn’t be terrified when u woke up. It didn’t work.” He started...

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Creset till Dawn Chapter 7

posted by RATHBONE07

This ones dedicated especially for XxSasyxX thanks for all your support on this:)) XoXo

“Yes! Yes!” Mary continued to jump. Thomas stood beside her, eyes opened wide. They’re shrieks were piercing. There was nothing I could do at this point. They were almost on me. They’re eyes were a bleeding red, reaching out towards me, begging me to come closer. This was wrong, what they were doing was wrong. There was nothing good about this. My fear was gone, and was refilled with courage. I wasn’t scared, death could come and go, I wouldn’t feel a thing. Mary was laughing Thomas joined. There...

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Mary Alice, Chapter 5

posted by teamalice_0

She looked like the pictures, except her hair was shorter now. She looked meer like me now that her hair is shorter. But the man volgende to her..

He looked nice, but I didn't like men. I didn't grow up around them. I was scared of them ,unless I got used to them. Which never happened. Even with my creator, Maria, who had men at her fingertips, I was still scared. They could do u some harm if they wanted to. And they were stronger than me.

I walked along with the group, comming back to the present. I wasn't scared of human men, they couldn't hurt me, vampires though, could. Some of the group almost...

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Amore - Ch. 12 - Against the Clock

posted by patrisha727

Just 15 minutes! How can I clear all of my vragen in just 15 minutes!?!?! I groaned. Angela knows the school better than I do. Then I had an idea.
"Angela?" I asked.
"Yeah?" she asked.
"Is there a bibliotheek here?"
"Of course there is. All colleges have a library. Follow me." she said, and we quickened our walking speed, almost running.
"The bibliotheek is through these doors." Angela zei while pointing to the double doors.
As we went in, there were at least 200 shelves of books. I looked around. I would definetely spend most my time in here in the future.

"So what exactly are we looking for?"...

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New Story - Switched

posted by patrisha727

hallo u guys. u may know me here for the story Evening ster and Amore. But this is an exclusive story that can only be read on the link I hope u guys would like to read "Switched". Here's a little summary:

Bella zwaan-, zwaan is a usual student in the small town of Forks. A new student comes along, and seemed to be hiding something huge. But Bella is also hiding something. But like forbidden love, they connect. Then on one April's Fool's Day, a mystical prank caused Edward and Bella to change bodies. While Carlisle tries to find the cure, Edward and Bella discovers the secrets behind their personal lives...

I hope u guys would want to read it. Plz kom bij my spot and read from there! Thx!
BTW: The link of "Switched" is up.

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Amore - Ch. 7 - A Visitor

posted by patrisha727

one for today! ^_^

I unpacked my things in about 20 minutes. There wasn't so many things to unpack in the first place. I only brought my clothes, some of my books, and toiletries. After I was done, I looked out of the window again, and saw the skyline of Juneau's sunset. It was beautiful up in the north. I missed home pagina too. There was a computer volgende to my bed, so I decided to turn it on and see if Renee sent any emails. Alice was looking in her closet for some outfits to wear tommorrow. I ignored her.

The computer started up about 10 times faster than my actual computer. I smiled when I saw...

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Blood Lusт - Cнαpтεг six.

posted by EdwardCullen604

"Cora why are your eyes...oh!" seths face went blank what did he think? did he still care about me i hoped so. What could i say to him, Surpise, it definitely was that but the word just didn't fit.

"hello i'm Elena this is my coven, Antonio and Charro...and now also Cora" her eyes lookedlike they were trying to burn a hole through ofcourse that was not the case she was just using her gift, willing him to accept this.

"Seth are u okay i'm so sorry about all of this i..." i didn't continue there was no point he was shaking so much that i doubted he was even listening to my words. As seth phased...

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LET'S RUN - Chapter Eight

posted by callejahLUVSed

sorry i took so long, i got grounded.. LONG STORY! anyway, hope this chapter is okay ! comment!!!

CHAPTER EIGHT- Allies

“Hey, Edward, can we sit volgende to you?”, I asked.
“Sure, sit here”, zei Edward. I sat down volgende to Alice but Edward stopped me.
“Steph, sit here”, he said, as he patted the zitplaats, stoel volgende to him. Jasper gave me a look and then my thoughts weren’t my own anymore.
Sis, Jasper thinks that Edward likes you.. want me to tell him anything? Emmett asked.
He thinks? I asked back. I waited a few seconden until Emmett grin.
He knows replied Emmett, and I saw a smile hiding in the...

4

Another Story chapter 30!

posted by surfergal

The following morning Alice woke me up for school. I was putting on perfume when cody knocked on my door.
"Come in". I said.
Hey, u Ready ? He ask
Yeah, Old on I have to brush my teeth I told him.
Ok. He zei as he went towards my bed to sit down. Once I was done brushing my teeth, Cody grabbed my bag and put me on his back and toted me down the stairs. My cruches were downstairs because Carlisle didn't want me to go up and down them. Cody help me out to his car, my was totalled sadly. When we got to school cody walked me to class except he didnt leave my side when we got there. It was still...