Chapter 19: Honorary wolf (Nessie's POV)

    The sun streamed into the open flap of the tent reflecting off of me and Jake’s skin sending prisms of color swirling around us. We had been laying in a contented silence for the past uur just trying to inpakken, wrap our heads around the fact that we were able to be here together without a worry. It amazed me how even after all of the drama that had unfolded in our lives over the past couple of weeks we could still fall right back into place as though nothing had happened. I was even meer grateful than I had been for each moment that I was in his arms.
    He smiled down at me his perfect white teeth flashing against his flawless skin as he ran his fingers up and down my bare back. I shivered at the electrifying sensation that his touch brought forth.
    “Do u know how much I love u Mrs. Black?”
    I propped myself so that my hands were on his muscular chest and my chin was resting against them giving me the perfect view of his stunning face.
    “I think that I have an idea…” I zei breathlessly.
    His face grew very serious; “I really don’t think that u understand what these past few weeks have done to me…” his eyes drifted far away and contained a heavy sadness as he continued. I stroked his cheek as he spoke his hand flew up to his face holding me to him- almost as though he still believed that at any seconde I would disappear.
    “You don’t understand Renesmee.”
I was now fully alert paying attention to his every word this was serious if he was reverting to my full name.
“… I watched you…die. I was helpless there was nothing that I could do to make it better. u are my imprint, my other half when u died I did too. I knew that I had to keep going for our children but honestly I am too weak without u I don’t think that I would have been strong enough to live without you… I would have chosen death over our children what kind of father does that?” His eyes snapped shut and my lips moved smoothly to caress his eyelids and then lingering on his earlobes as I whispered, “My poor sweet Jacob. I am so sorry for all that u went through…”
    His face twisted in surprise, “YOU are sorry, Nessie u almost died because I couldn’t; protect you. u have nothing to apologize for.”
    I shot him a look of warning and he obediently gave up the grudge he held against himself.
    He sighed running a hand through his hair and then he smiled at me, a sad smile but still it was progress.
    “The point is that I realized that I love u even meer than ever and I didn’t think that it was possible. u are amazing and u are absolutely everything to me. u sacrificed your life in order to give me our beautiful children… I have a little something for u it is nothing compared to everything that u have gegeven me.”
I arched an eyebrow, “Jake u know I don’t want u to spend money on me…”
“Yes Nessie we all know how u feel about that…”
I snorted in laughter at his mock seriousness.
“I bought the materials but I made it…”
I sat up quickly holding my hand out. I loved when my Jacob made me gifts they held such meaning.
He laughed at my eagerness, “Still so much a child.” He reached into one of the bags on the side of the tent and he pulled out a tiny leather pouch.
“Thank u for our children and for fighting as hard as u did to come back to me I love u Ness.”
I pulled the leather drawstring and reached into it carefully pulling out the contents. I gasped at the beauty of what I held in my hands. I knew that I would be crying had I been able.
“Oh Jacob…”
His brow furrowed in concern, “Do u like it? I have never worked with platinum before. We owe my dad a new work bench I broke it because I kinda’ got kind of pissed off… I think they look meer like blobs than…”
I placed a finger on his lip silencing him so that I could observe the beauty of his work in the silence that it deserved.
He had taken a platinum charm bracelet and made little wolves out of platinum. The wolves had such detail own to the finest line on each face. He had gegeven each of the wolf’s eyes made out of their birthstones first Jake, then me, and each of our children in their birth order roze tourmaline for the girls and oranje tourmaline for the boys.
    I touched each charm delicately and then turned to Jake to have him put it one me nest to the promise bracelet he had made for me so many years go.
    He smiled at my obvious love towards the bracelet that he had made me.
    “I wanted to give u something that would tell u the birth order of the babies since u weren’t really…there for it…” his voice broke.
    I sat on his lap and nestled his head against my chest as I stroked his hair. My lips moved against his neck in between my words.
    “It is the most thoughtful and beautiful gift I have ever received. I love it. I will never take it off.”
    He smiled my favoriete goofy Jake grin.
“Do u get it? Me and the kids are all wolves but we are made out of a cold hard metal. We decided to allow u to be an honorary wolf- u know so u wouldn’t feel left out.”
    I rolled my eyes, “How kind of u all- I think that the initiation was a little much though don’t you?”
He started out looking as though he was pained door my words but then something changed in his eyes and he snickered at my comment. Perhaps he truly was moving on from this, what a relief.
“Well it has to be that way otherwise anyone could be a vamp-wolf…”
I shook my head at his corniness but I was glad that he was getting back to normal and coming out of his depression and self hatred.
    “You just couldn’t help yourself could you?” I teased. Suddenly my mind flashed back to the night before, “And while we are on the topic of not controlling ourselves what the hell happened last night? u were out of control.”
    He looked at me sheepishly and I could tell he would have blushed if he were still alive. “What can I say Renesmee Black, u lead me to do some pretty crazy things…your scent alone is enough to make a sane man go mad.”
    I giggled at him as I pushed him onto his back so that I could thank him for his gift properly.