Okay, I'll admit that I haven't laughed this hard at a film since I saw The Hangover last summer. Seriously, what was the plot here? I actually found the first film to be much better than this travesty. u can find my review of the first movie link. I'll go through it like I do with all movies. Pros and cons, then an overall.
Pros
The Volturi
Finally! Some ACTUAL vampires!! The Volturi I found were pretty awesome because, u know, they actually were cruel, soulless, mean, and did some actual VAMPIRING. The part towards the end where a tour group of humans is led directly to them and u hear their screams was pretty awesome. Come on people, that's what vampires do. They drink the blood of huuumans. Sheesh. Also, they were pretty cruel too, what with the whole slaan, smack down of Edward and nearly killing Bella (so bummed that didn't happen). Getting a small glimpse of the actor who will be playing Grindelwald in Deathly Hallows was a nice bonus too. So for all u Twilight fans, the Volturi are GOOD examples of vampires. Much like the soulless vampires on Buffy.
The wolf Clan
Now why I didn't particularly enjoy the crappy computer animatie of the wolves (more on that later) I did enjoy the characters of the wolf clan. The one scene that I really liked is where we see Sam's fiance, with half her face clawed up. My friend and I definitely agree that even with the claw marks she was amazingly beautiful. I would see a movie about her and Sam in a heartbeat. It would be much much better than this terrible film. Pity they were stuck in it.
Jacob
Lautner got hot. No denying that. Other than the hotness factor though, he was probably the only real character with any dimensions and depth besides Bella's father. The way their relationship built to where Jacob fell for Bella, and she pretty much for him, was very realistic and healthy. So u can imagine my dissappointment when she chose Edward, who abandoned, controlled, and basically led to much of her depression, over Jacob. u Team Jacob fans, I now consider u semi-sane because u recognized a HEALTHY relationship. complimenten to u guys.
Cons
Bella...you there?
I hate the character of Bella, I truly do. She doesn't think for herself, is defined solely door her relationships, and for some reason Stewart could NEVER SHUT HER MOUTH. Even when she wasn't talking!! What was up with that?! Gaah. The fact too that she dissed her vrienden at school and put her dad through so much crap with the screaming at night (seriously, wtf, she doesn't have PTSD) made me just loathe her character even meer with a passion. Furthermore, her whole obsession over age was just ridiculous. Ohhh nooo you're a whole jaar older than your 107 jaar old vampire boyfriend!! Now he's not going to love u anymore!!! Yea, stupid. Those fans out there that idolize her, please find a healthier role model such as Eowyn, Hermione, heck even Lily on How I Met Your Mother. Bella is a very unhealthy and psychologically unstable character and is an insult to females everywhere. She didn't even drive her own car most of the time! Disgusting.
How is she special too btw?
If someone can explain how Bella is unaffected door any of the vampire's powers, it'd be much appreciated. That just seems like something that's just thrown out there. My theory? It's because Bella has no thoughts!
Edward...dude wtf?!
Sooo this guy that supposedly is totally in love with u throws u into a glass tafel, tabel for protection, lies to you, breaks up with you, and abandons u in the forest. A car ride home pagina would have been nice plskthnx. Also, the throwing into the glass tafel, tabel for her protection? That was totally safe. u know, because she was bleeding even meer profusely after the tafel, tabel than she was after the papercut. Also, who has ever bled that much after a papercut anyways, if at all? Furthermore, the fact that he kept "appearing" everytime Bella had an adrenaline rush was just weird. I think if my ex-boyfriend started tonen up everytime I had a rush, I'd go and get a CT of my brain to make sure I didn't have a brain tumor a la Izzie seeing Denny b/c of her tumor. Also, the fact that Bella takes him right back after all the crap he put her through was just great. Really shows girls that hey, after a guy lies to u like that u can totally trust him again with no really good explanation other than "I love you". Nice.
OMG a Plot Point!!!
Annd what was the plot?? Everytime a possible plot point appeared it seemed to get derailed, such as the shots of Victoria, Laurent, of whenever anyone zei Bella was acting crazy. If anyone spoke reason of a plot point appeared, it did not toon again.
Lupin's wolf Looked Better...
The film must have had the world's worst computer animatie department because those wolves were a travesty. How about those transf...I mean FURSPLOSIONS eh? Really bad animatie coupled with a laughable transformation sequence (FURSPLODE!) led to even meer laughs. Too bad there weren't enough fursplosions.
That's What She Said!
There were way too many lines in the film where one could easily say that. For example- Bella: I'm coming! Me: That's what she said! Edward: I don't want u to come! Me: That's what HE said!! If u don't get the meaning behind that, then please go watch The Office where it is regularly utilized. Furthermore, the scene where Edward kisses Bella in front of her truck after the party was too funny. Edward acted like...well like link SNL skit. Please be forewarned that that link is meant for those 16 and older. That scene probably got one of the biggest laughs out of me.
Blocked
Finally, all the kiss-blocking that poor Jacob suffered through. Face stempel, punch high school guy who threw up at an action movie (he's so gay then), Bella denies, and Edward calls just as he macks on the upper lip! Seriously, Jacob should have just pulled an Owen (Grey's Anatomy character), grabbed Bella, and just rocked her world. Doubt she woulda left if he did that.
Overall
Overall, this movie was a travesty to the film community. It was plotless, very poorly acted, and featured a very unhealthy set of characters that girls and women alike should not look up to as role models. Bella should have been thrown in a psych center for the stuff she was experiencing. I'm not going to apologize either if I've offended anyone. This is my honest opinion, and I know I wasn't as kind as I was in my first review. Now you've heard an opinion of an anti-Twilighter. u Team Jacobers, u got some respect from me now. Please save your brain cells and your money and do not see this movie. Unless u want a really good laugh then door all means do. Oh and one meer thing to note. The ending with the whole Marry me? Ending on the *gasp* garnered a huge laugh from our audience. And just for my own satisfaction, FURSPLODE TIME!!
Pros
The Volturi
Finally! Some ACTUAL vampires!! The Volturi I found were pretty awesome because, u know, they actually were cruel, soulless, mean, and did some actual VAMPIRING. The part towards the end where a tour group of humans is led directly to them and u hear their screams was pretty awesome. Come on people, that's what vampires do. They drink the blood of huuumans. Sheesh. Also, they were pretty cruel too, what with the whole slaan, smack down of Edward and nearly killing Bella (so bummed that didn't happen). Getting a small glimpse of the actor who will be playing Grindelwald in Deathly Hallows was a nice bonus too. So for all u Twilight fans, the Volturi are GOOD examples of vampires. Much like the soulless vampires on Buffy.
The wolf Clan
Now why I didn't particularly enjoy the crappy computer animatie of the wolves (more on that later) I did enjoy the characters of the wolf clan. The one scene that I really liked is where we see Sam's fiance, with half her face clawed up. My friend and I definitely agree that even with the claw marks she was amazingly beautiful. I would see a movie about her and Sam in a heartbeat. It would be much much better than this terrible film. Pity they were stuck in it.
Jacob
Lautner got hot. No denying that. Other than the hotness factor though, he was probably the only real character with any dimensions and depth besides Bella's father. The way their relationship built to where Jacob fell for Bella, and she pretty much for him, was very realistic and healthy. So u can imagine my dissappointment when she chose Edward, who abandoned, controlled, and basically led to much of her depression, over Jacob. u Team Jacob fans, I now consider u semi-sane because u recognized a HEALTHY relationship. complimenten to u guys.
Cons
Bella...you there?
I hate the character of Bella, I truly do. She doesn't think for herself, is defined solely door her relationships, and for some reason Stewart could NEVER SHUT HER MOUTH. Even when she wasn't talking!! What was up with that?! Gaah. The fact too that she dissed her vrienden at school and put her dad through so much crap with the screaming at night (seriously, wtf, she doesn't have PTSD) made me just loathe her character even meer with a passion. Furthermore, her whole obsession over age was just ridiculous. Ohhh nooo you're a whole jaar older than your 107 jaar old vampire boyfriend!! Now he's not going to love u anymore!!! Yea, stupid. Those fans out there that idolize her, please find a healthier role model such as Eowyn, Hermione, heck even Lily on How I Met Your Mother. Bella is a very unhealthy and psychologically unstable character and is an insult to females everywhere. She didn't even drive her own car most of the time! Disgusting.
How is she special too btw?
If someone can explain how Bella is unaffected door any of the vampire's powers, it'd be much appreciated. That just seems like something that's just thrown out there. My theory? It's because Bella has no thoughts!
Edward...dude wtf?!
Sooo this guy that supposedly is totally in love with u throws u into a glass tafel, tabel for protection, lies to you, breaks up with you, and abandons u in the forest. A car ride home pagina would have been nice plskthnx. Also, the throwing into the glass tafel, tabel for her protection? That was totally safe. u know, because she was bleeding even meer profusely after the tafel, tabel than she was after the papercut. Also, who has ever bled that much after a papercut anyways, if at all? Furthermore, the fact that he kept "appearing" everytime Bella had an adrenaline rush was just weird. I think if my ex-boyfriend started tonen up everytime I had a rush, I'd go and get a CT of my brain to make sure I didn't have a brain tumor a la Izzie seeing Denny b/c of her tumor. Also, the fact that Bella takes him right back after all the crap he put her through was just great. Really shows girls that hey, after a guy lies to u like that u can totally trust him again with no really good explanation other than "I love you". Nice.
OMG a Plot Point!!!
Annd what was the plot?? Everytime a possible plot point appeared it seemed to get derailed, such as the shots of Victoria, Laurent, of whenever anyone zei Bella was acting crazy. If anyone spoke reason of a plot point appeared, it did not toon again.
Lupin's wolf Looked Better...
The film must have had the world's worst computer animatie department because those wolves were a travesty. How about those transf...I mean FURSPLOSIONS eh? Really bad animatie coupled with a laughable transformation sequence (FURSPLODE!) led to even meer laughs. Too bad there weren't enough fursplosions.
That's What She Said!
There were way too many lines in the film where one could easily say that. For example- Bella: I'm coming! Me: That's what she said! Edward: I don't want u to come! Me: That's what HE said!! If u don't get the meaning behind that, then please go watch The Office where it is regularly utilized. Furthermore, the scene where Edward kisses Bella in front of her truck after the party was too funny. Edward acted like...well like link SNL skit. Please be forewarned that that link is meant for those 16 and older. That scene probably got one of the biggest laughs out of me.
Blocked
Finally, all the kiss-blocking that poor Jacob suffered through. Face stempel, punch high school guy who threw up at an action movie (he's so gay then), Bella denies, and Edward calls just as he macks on the upper lip! Seriously, Jacob should have just pulled an Owen (Grey's Anatomy character), grabbed Bella, and just rocked her world. Doubt she woulda left if he did that.
Overall
Overall, this movie was a travesty to the film community. It was plotless, very poorly acted, and featured a very unhealthy set of characters that girls and women alike should not look up to as role models. Bella should have been thrown in a psych center for the stuff she was experiencing. I'm not going to apologize either if I've offended anyone. This is my honest opinion, and I know I wasn't as kind as I was in my first review. Now you've heard an opinion of an anti-Twilighter. u Team Jacobers, u got some respect from me now. Please save your brain cells and your money and do not see this movie. Unless u want a really good laugh then door all means do. Oh and one meer thing to note. The ending with the whole Marry me? Ending on the *gasp* garnered a huge laugh from our audience. And just for my own satisfaction, FURSPLODE TIME!!
Ah, ah, ah ,ah, ah
Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah
Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah
Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah
I seek u out
Flay u alive
One meer word and u won’t survive
And I’m not scared of your stolen power
See right through u any hour
I won’t soothe your pain
I won’t ease your strain
You’ll be waiting in vain
I got nothing for u to gain
I’m taking it slow
Feeding my flame
Shuffling the cards of your game
And just in time
In the right place
Suddenly I will play my ace
I won’t soothe your pain
(Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah)
I won’t ease your strain
(Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah)
You’ll be waiting in vain
(Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah)
I got nothing for u to gain
Eyes on fire
Your spine is ablaze
Felling any foe with my gaze
And just in time
In the right place
Steadily emerging with grace
Aaaaahhhhh
Felling any foe with my gaze
Aaaaahhhhh
Steadily emerging with grace
Aaaaahhhhh
Felling any foe with my gaze
Aaaaahhhhh
Steadily emerging with grace
Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah
Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah
Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah
I seek u out
Flay u alive
One meer word and u won’t survive
And I’m not scared of your stolen power
See right through u any hour
I won’t soothe your pain
I won’t ease your strain
You’ll be waiting in vain
I got nothing for u to gain
I’m taking it slow
Feeding my flame
Shuffling the cards of your game
And just in time
In the right place
Suddenly I will play my ace
I won’t soothe your pain
(Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah)
I won’t ease your strain
(Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah)
You’ll be waiting in vain
(Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah)
I got nothing for u to gain
Eyes on fire
Your spine is ablaze
Felling any foe with my gaze
And just in time
In the right place
Steadily emerging with grace
Aaaaahhhhh
Felling any foe with my gaze
Aaaaahhhhh
Steadily emerging with grace
Aaaaahhhhh
Felling any foe with my gaze
Aaaaahhhhh
Steadily emerging with grace
The uur has begun
Your eyes have now opened
To a world where madness craves
To a world where hope’s enslaved
Oh I tremble for my love always
Your window’s opened wide
Your innocence takes flight
To a world where madness craves
To a world where hope’s enslaved
Oh I tremble for my love always
It’s a world where madness craves
It’s a world where hope’s enslaved
Oh I tremble for my love always
It’s a world where madness craves
It’s a world where hope’s enslaved
Yeah I tremble for u love always
Your eyes have now opened
To a world where madness craves
To a world where hope’s enslaved
Oh I tremble for my love always
Your window’s opened wide
Your innocence takes flight
To a world where madness craves
To a world where hope’s enslaved
Oh I tremble for my love always
It’s a world where madness craves
It’s a world where hope’s enslaved
Oh I tremble for my love always
It’s a world where madness craves
It’s a world where hope’s enslaved
Yeah I tremble for u love always
When the thorn struik, bush turns white that’s when I’ll come home
I am going out to see what I can sow
And I don’t know where I’ll go
And I don’t know what I’ll see
But I’ll try not to bring it back home pagina with me
Like the morning sun your eyes will follow me
As u watch me wander, curse the powers that be
‘Cause all I want is here and now
But it’s already been and gone
Our intentions always last that bit too long
Far, far away, no voices sounding
No one around me and you’re still there
Far, far away, no choices passing
No time confounds me and you’re still there
In the full moon’s light I listen to the stream
And in between the silence hear u calling me
But I don’t know where I am
And I don’t trust who I’ve been
But if I come home pagina how will I ever leave
I am going out to see what I can sow
And I don’t know where I’ll go
And I don’t know what I’ll see
But I’ll try not to bring it back home pagina with me
Like the morning sun your eyes will follow me
As u watch me wander, curse the powers that be
‘Cause all I want is here and now
But it’s already been and gone
Our intentions always last that bit too long
Far, far away, no voices sounding
No one around me and you’re still there
Far, far away, no choices passing
No time confounds me and you’re still there
In the full moon’s light I listen to the stream
And in between the silence hear u calling me
But I don’t know where I am
And I don’t trust who I’ve been
But if I come home pagina how will I ever leave
They've nominated the flick for 8 of their Razzie awards, which are like the Oscars but for the "worsts" of the year, so they're a little meer fun.
Breaking Dawn was nominated for:
•Worst Picture
•Worst Screenplay
•Worst Prequel, Remake, Rip-Off, of Sequel
•Worst Director
•Worst Screen Ensemble
•Worst Actor: Taylor Lautner
•Worst Actress: Kristen Stewart
•Worst Screen Couple
Do u think Breaking Dawn deserves the nominations?
Breaking Dawn may have been a smash hit with Twihards all over the world, but the Golden framboos foundation was impressed for a different reason.
They've nominated the flick for 8 of their Razzie awards, which are like the Oscars but for the "worsts" of the year, so they're a little meer fun.
Breaking Dawn was nominated for:
•Worst Picture
•Worst Screenplay
•Worst Prequel, Remake, Rip-Off, of Sequel
•Worst Director
•Worst Screen Ensemble
•Worst Actor: Taylor Lautner
•Worst Actress: Kristen Stewart
•Worst Screen Couple
Do u think Breaking Dawn deserves the nominations?
They've nominated the flick for 8 of their Razzie awards, which are like the Oscars but for the "worsts" of the year, so they're a little meer fun.
Breaking Dawn was nominated for:
•Worst Picture
•Worst Screenplay
•Worst Prequel, Remake, Rip-Off, of Sequel
•Worst Director
•Worst Screen Ensemble
•Worst Actor: Taylor Lautner
•Worst Actress: Kristen Stewart
•Worst Screen Couple
Do u think Breaking Dawn deserves the nominations?
All right guys, as u all have probably noticed my last chapter was a bit of a dozer, but don't worry my volgende chapter will be right. And just incase that u have not figured it out yet. Most was the chapter is correct except for the bit about going into the car. That bit will be coming up in the volgende chapter. Also don't be afraid to give me any advice on how I can make my writing Better any critasim is welcome.
On another note this whole story will only be klok, bell as ok and I will be doing other stories that will be like this one but indifferent povs
SOS
Love flynnismine
On another note this whole story will only be klok, bell as ok and I will be doing other stories that will be like this one but indifferent povs
SOS
Love flynnismine
Looking Nessie in the face at the airport was harder than a challenge I went through as a wolf.
"Promise u won't forget me?" My voice was kind of shallow and.... I couldn't describe it.
"Never." The defiance in her voice was comforting.
"Even though you'll be in France." France. Bloody miles away.
"Jake, don't do this to me. Rosalie did my make up, and I like it. And anyway, I'll only be away for a few weeks. It'll go very quick." if I continue building the house, then yes. Bt that s unlikely.
"I'll miss you."
"Me too."
I roped an arm round Nessie for a last hug. Then, with her eyes misted over, she left. I walked out to the Rabbit, and all the way I felt like she had taken half my hart-, hart with her. Renesmee, come back, I silently wished as I started up the old Rabbit. I knew that, for 3 weeks, she would drip into my mind like a leaky faucet. Splash, splash, sploosh. Renesmee, Renesmee, Nessie.
"Promise u won't forget me?" My voice was kind of shallow and.... I couldn't describe it.
"Never." The defiance in her voice was comforting.
"Even though you'll be in France." France. Bloody miles away.
"Jake, don't do this to me. Rosalie did my make up, and I like it. And anyway, I'll only be away for a few weeks. It'll go very quick." if I continue building the house, then yes. Bt that s unlikely.
"I'll miss you."
"Me too."
I roped an arm round Nessie for a last hug. Then, with her eyes misted over, she left. I walked out to the Rabbit, and all the way I felt like she had taken half my hart-, hart with her. Renesmee, come back, I silently wished as I started up the old Rabbit. I knew that, for 3 weeks, she would drip into my mind like a leaky faucet. Splash, splash, sploosh. Renesmee, Renesmee, Nessie.