I've known who ive been becoming my whole life, and my whole life, ive been in love with her. I think shes the one, my imprinted parnter, she has to be, everythigs there and waitting, shes perfect.
Bella, is my one. My soulmate, only time will secure her as mine forever. She not loves of me. BUt im not afraid of hurt door that, because it will change because of the magic growing in me. There will be no denying it on her behalf once ive been throught the phase that waits unexpectedly. She holds my hands and calls her best friend, but the see the meer in her eyes. Im sort of beautiful to her, but her pride is bigger then her heart, only i know that.
Shes over everyday, and everyday i wish that i will change so that things will change between us.
Its beeen forseen, her hand in mine, her lips upon mine, everyting her and mine.


Feb-
I really hate writing journals, its not a males persona, but dad enforces it, pushing down my throat that it will help with the memory loss from the change, he says that sometimes the first change can take up to two weeks to come back, well thats happened to Sam. Bummer.
Bella comes home pagina today from Arizona, her Mum still lives there, not to mention, Bella's little brother 1st birthday. Bella speaks of him all the time ,"Edward this, Edward that" , i cant imagine the way she would be when she has Children. I can hear it now "Jacob Jr, Isabella"
She promised me that shw would drive down tomorrow, zei she got me a surprise, its eating to my bones, i hate suspense. She called her late xmas present. Why is that when bella speaks the Christmas, i think of Mariah Carey-All i want for Christmas is you?
Love drunk...



Feb-02.

She come over again today. Her skin glowing from the burning sun from her own country. She arrived in her usual self, but eager then normall, whats left after bones?
Her sea blue overhemd, shirt empathised her body like Victoria Secret, i couldn't help but imagine.. (dad stop reading)and pair of her favourite black sweats.
She walked faster then ususal.holding one arm behind her back. my hart-, hart pretty much dropped to my stomach at that point, i have never seen her soo beautiful then right now, and ive had never beeen so happy to see her. But i was so scared that she would be excitement throught my eyes, after all ,she had let me down nicely.
She smiled that smile i remember and replay before i sleep. and Hugged me tigher then ov average. i promised myself i would never forget it.
It was a dream catcher, , if only she knew that i dont dream bad dreams, only of her.