It's weird and messed up and stupid but I felt lie writing so here..Also, if u don't know that he watched Blade (his wife) die then u won't understand it

The click-clack of her shoes echoed in the long hallways as she made her way to the back of the stony building. She found him standing at a door, arms folded across his broad chest, head down and eyebrows furrowed. He looked up as she got closer and gave her a small sad smile.
"Still?"
"Fraid so. Shall we?"
She nodded her head and opened the door. The room was dark with the exception of a few clusters of lighted candles. The room was bare, inhabitable to anyone except him. He sat in the middle of a drawn out shape in the dirt floor.
His eyes were closed and she saw something similar to black seeds near his feet. She waved a hand and the flames in the candle brightened the room instantly. She heard a curse and a growl as she moved to face the slightly younger boy.
"What are u doing?"
"Can't u tell? u did it lots of times."
The older boy sighed and stood at the door.
"Why must u be difficult?"
"It's in my nature. Didn't u teach me that?"
"And now I regret it."
"You are no help," she hissed and then turned her attention back to the annoyed boy. "Why?"
"Never done it before.."
"Not a good enough reason.." Metus mumbled.
She growled at him and, dragging him door the ear, led him to a corner.
"Be quiet!"
"I can hear u still."
She looked back at him with concern clear in her blue gaze.
"Why are you..?"
"It's easier than remembering what happened....I should have killed him.."
"You technically did."
He scowled at her, picking up on of the seeds.
"What's that for?"
"Call it a purger."
"..it wasn't your fault, Ter."
"You weren't there! u never were! And neither was he! u can both act like we're related, but we know that the truth is I'm not like you. Our powers may be similar, but our blood isn't!"
"Hey we were there that night too!" Metus retorted sharply. "We saw what happened!"
"And yet u never once zei anything."
The room fell into silence and the candles dimmed once more. He stared into the flames, his eyes hard and cold. His icy gaze shifted to the dozen of so seeds, back to the fire, and to the seeds. She watched him and moved to kneel behind him.
"If u take those, u won't ever find her. Much less remember."
"I don't need to find her. I knew where she was. And I know things u never will. u have no right to say crap to me."
She sighed and gave him a strong hug.
"I will be doing what I can. We both will."
He nodded very slightly and then the other two slowly left the room, Metus grumbling under his breath. Once alone, he placed the seeds in a pattern before him.
"Terror?"
He looked up at the shadows and watched her appear from the darkness. Her hips moved in an almost seductive way and she put a pale hand on his hair, eyes sparkling at him with a sort of fondness.
"My offer still stands."
He shook his head and she kneeled door him. A hand touched his knee gently and she looked at him head on.
"Wouldn't it be easier to forget?"
"When have I ever done things the easy way, Cis?"
"True."
"Do u think u could do something..?"
"Not a chance in Hell. That's why I stay here."
Her flaxen-hair bobbed as she nodded and she stood, looking at the little seeds.
"A purge? Not many do that.."
"Humans can't, purebloods won't. But I'm a monster. It's better."
"And why would u do that to yourself?"
"Why? Then I never have to hunt again."
"..if it's a consolation, she doesn't deserve what u offer. Not many do. u take on too many burdens."
"Burdens?" He cracked a devilish smile. "That's my specialty, doll. Anything u fear I take."
"Then why get rid of it?"
"It's better to forget your own, right? Besides, I won't need it much longer.."
Her eyes studied him and he gazed at her, drinking her sight in before her form shifted.

His eyes snapped open, the recent wounds glowing an icy blue into his skin. The room was left the same but the smell of wild strawberries lingered in the ironic darkness. He clenched the remaining six seeds in his hands and stood.
"Ten down. Now to forget the rest."