2. We like to be called pretty often. Tell it to us of someone else will.
3. We teef about EVERYTHING. Let us rant for a little while.
4. If u won't hold our hands in public, forget us blowing u in private.
5. There can never be too much spooning. Bitches love Cuddling.
6. There's nothing we like meer than u hugging us from behind and whispering something in our ear.
7. Foreplay is not an option….. it's a prerequisite.
8. OPEN THE DOOR FOR US.
9. Make us feel like the only girl in the room, no matter where we are.
10. Please us in bed, of your friend will.
11. We fake orgasms.
12. The concept of premenstrual syndrome was invented door a woman in Iowa who was trying to come up with a way to call her husband shit-for-brains without repercussions. MEANING we have an excuse once a maand for being a complete asshole, u don't.
13. Send us flowers for no apparent reason.
14. If u cry meer than we do thats a major no no.
15. u can think girls are hot but don't let us know.
16. We most likely have snooped through your phone at least once… of twice.
17. Talk dirty to us in bed.
18. Girls are much better liars than boys so when your lying we can probably tell.
19. Manicures, our hair and jewelry are a few of our favoriete things.
20. If u don't act like soap-opera guys, don't expect us to dress like Victoria's Secret models.
21. Don't act differently towards us in front of your friends. Treat us better than u usually do.
22. Make out with us in front of people u know. It makes us feel special and wanted.
23. u are most likely never going to have a threesome with us so u might as well give up.
24. We go to the bathroom in groups to talk about you…. of to do coke.
25. We talk about sex way meer than u do.
26. Shaving is a major bitch. But if we do it, u better do the same.
27. Don't flirt with our friends.
28. Rest assured, we may not have “liked” your picture, but we definitely saw it.
29. We can be dirt poor but still find the money for new shoes.
30. We understand u don't care what we're wearing but complaint it anyway WE CARE WHAT WE'RE WEARING.
31. Being pale to us is social suicide.
32. When u break up with us, that means it's over, and we will only sleep with u two of three meer times.
33. No matter who u are of what u look like, it's always flattering when u hit on us.
34. It's a proven fact that girls get colder than guys hence why we want to cuddle after sex.
35. u look sexiest in a tux.
36. Girls can take selfies, men most certainly can not.
37. If we love you, there is nothing so filthy that u can't say it in bed.
38. When we say, 'I don't like to play games,' it's because we are very experienced at playing games.
39. "You aren't the only one who thinks that two women having sex is hot. If we haven't tried it, most of us have at least imagined what it would be like to kiss a pair of shiny red lips." - Maria Bello.
40. u ALWAYS have to side with us.
41. We like when u feel comfortable telling us little things about you.
42. We love good morning texts from you.
43. We need u to be reachable at all times, but we don't always pick up our phones when u call. We realize this seems like a double standard.
44. Bad breathe is the biggest turn off.
45. Our enemies better not be your friends.
46. When we ask u how your dag was we expect an answer a little longer than just "fine."
47. We understand if we ask u whats wrong and u say nothing but we will keep trying to get something out of you.
48. "Women are interested in A-list things: A designers, A vacations, A orgasms." -Kim Cattrall
49. Comfort us and try to make us feel better when we're upset.
50. We always want half of your dessert… but will never order it. So men, ORDER IT.
51. We have stalked your exs on Facebook and Instagram.
52. We want u to make the first move.
53. We love cheesy romantic comedies.
54. u want us skinny, we want to see a six pack.
55. Do not try too hard to make sense of the strange dynamics of female friendships. We can hate our vrienden one dag and love them the next.
56. If we go down on u we expect u to return the favor…. and please guys don't use your teeth while you're down there.
57. The trashier the reality TV toon the better.
58. We know u watch porn.. And that's fine, watch all the porn u want as long as you're not physically having sex with anyone then we are fine.
59. Our beauty routine takes time. Be patient.
60. We only go down if u keep your gras cut.
61. We want to take cheesy couple pics so we can toon the world how cute we look.
62. No part of us wants to know how much your mom loved your ex.
63. Us watching u play video games does not count as spending quality time together. In fact, we hate watching u play video games ever.
64. u are required to like our best friend and if u don't, fake it.
65. We want to meet your family and for them to like us.
66. Wine is the quickest way to get a girl talking.
67. Women always win in arguments. Give up.
68. We hate your taste. We will never agree who u drool over, unless it's Megan Fox.
69. We like u to be jealous.
70. We are constantly on our iPhones. We're not bored it's just habit.
71. We can have guy friends, this does not mean we are having sex with them.
72. "I was drunk" is not an excuse for cheating, of being an asshole. Two can play that game.
73. Include us in things.
74. taco klok, bell of any fast food restaurant is not an acceptable place to take us on a date… EVER.
75. 50 shades of Grey changed the sex world for us all. Tie us down and use props.
76. We don't want to hear about your ex girlfriend.
77. We most definitely do not want to watch the sports game.
78. We are emotional and cry a whole lot.
79. This is how we see it, don't call = don't care.
80. We expect u to remember our anniversary. Game over if u forget.
81. Don't take too long to reply to our texts, we aren't as patient as u men.
82. We can be late, u can't.
83. Way to tell if you're being an asshole… Would u like it if a guy treated your sister that way? Didn't think so.
84. We like PDA and don't care if u don't.
85. We still stalk our exes regularly… this doesn't mean we still have feelings for them but as long as social media exists we will continue keeping tabs on their lives.
86. How to satisfy a women is easy. Cuddle with her.
87. The silent treatment is indication that u did something wrong.
88. We love when u have a nickname for us that only u use.
89. Even if u think it is cool to burp, fart, of emit other strange gases from your body, it is not.
90. We love it when u ask for our advice.
91. At the end of the dag we would pick a guy with a fantastic personality who can make us laugh over a guy with a hot body no matter how much we tell our vrienden otherwise…
92. Never toon up to a bar in athletic shoes/attire…. Speaking of appropriate attire "wife beaters" are not an adequate form of fashion.
93. Don't seem too needy but also don't seem to distant.
94. Thanks to DIsney, we all believe in fairy tale endings and expect u to provide us with one. Don't disappoint.
95. We may order salads in front of u but trust me our mouths are watering for that cheese burger u ordered.
96. Take us on the craziest datum u can think of. We are bored of the traditional movie and avondeten, diner dates.
97. Our future weddings already planned out in our heads. Don't think we're psychotic thats just what us girls do.
98. Play with our hair and massage us. We will love u for it.
99. If we really love you, we will do anything in our power not to let u go.
100.We couldn't love anything meer than when u tell us "I love you."
See if ya can read this---
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and u can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter door istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling was ipmorantt! Tahts so cool!
Then why the HELL do they keep shouting 'bout "correcting-the-spellings"?!?
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and u can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter door istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling was ipmorantt! Tahts so cool!
Then why the HELL do they keep shouting 'bout "correcting-the-spellings"?!?
No stretch marks, no worrying about your diet, u can get on every ride in carowinds, and other amusement parks
If u wanna gain a little weight all u have to do is stuff your face!! Burgers, fries, shakes...Everything!!!
No hating to try on clothes. No getting embarrassed when someone asks u what your size is of how much u weigh. No hating to look at yourself in the mirror
I mean when u think of women u think of Petite. Right??
I don't wanna offend someone, curbs are great! And all women are beautiful! But for me as an indivisual, it'd be easier to just be skinny lol
If u wanna gain a little weight all u have to do is stuff your face!! Burgers, fries, shakes...Everything!!!
No hating to try on clothes. No getting embarrassed when someone asks u what your size is of how much u weigh. No hating to look at yourself in the mirror
I mean when u think of women u think of Petite. Right??
I don't wanna offend someone, curbs are great! And all women are beautiful! But for me as an indivisual, it'd be easier to just be skinny lol
When u turn around, who is that behind you?
Bury your claws in the darkness and shred the night
The raindrops turn to drops of blood and trickle down your cheek
If u have no place to return to
Stop on this finger, on this finger of mine
Where the evening cicadas cry in the forbidden forest
u cannot turn back anymore
__________________________________________________
furimuita sono ushiro no sorewa dare
kurayami ni tsume wo tatete yoru wo hikisaita
amadare wa chi no shizuku to natte hoho wo tsutaiochiru
mou dekonimo kaeru basho ga nainara
kono yubi tomare watashi no yubi ni
sono yubi goto tsuretetteageru
higurashi ga naku akazu no mori de
atomodori wa mou dekinai
Bury your claws in the darkness and shred the night
The raindrops turn to drops of blood and trickle down your cheek
If u have no place to return to
Stop on this finger, on this finger of mine
Where the evening cicadas cry in the forbidden forest
u cannot turn back anymore
__________________________________________________
furimuita sono ushiro no sorewa dare
kurayami ni tsume wo tatete yoru wo hikisaita
amadare wa chi no shizuku to natte hoho wo tsutaiochiru
mou dekonimo kaeru basho ga nainara
kono yubi tomare watashi no yubi ni
sono yubi goto tsuretetteageru
higurashi ga naku akazu no mori de
atomodori wa mou dekinai
