My Little pony Friendship is Magic Club
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 Toothy
Toothy
Chapter 5: talk about eye candy

it was to weeks after Pop and Cub got to Ponyville, Cub came back, none of the ponies understood the system but they were glad it existed. “i wonder who's coming today.” Flippy thought. “hmm......judging door who has come already............either Cuddles, Giggles of Toothy are next, too many killers have come.”

“hey Flippy, could u help me with something?” Twilight asked.

“what is it, I was thinking of who's coming today.”

“well, someone is coming today and they want a party but Pinkie is sick.” Twilight explained.

“oh my god, with what?” Flippy asked.

“nothing major, just a cold.” Twilight told him.

“starts that way, then u wake up one dag and u sneezed your nose off in your sleep.” Flippy mumbled.

“well, whatever you're talking about, Pinkie wants us to throw the party here, yes u have to help, you've been sitting in that chair like a slug for three weeks now.”

“hey, I've gotten up.” Flippy retorted.

“to get food and peanuts to throw at Pop and Cub when they visit to ask questions!” Twilight reminded him.

“oh yeah, well it's been a fun ride but I guess I have to put down this newspaper and pay attention to the world.” Flippy said.

“you're holding a sandwich.” Twilight told him.

“oh right, let me eat the rest of this real quick.”

“no time, give it to Spike.”

“but I'm hungry.”

“give it, now!” Twilight zei using her magic to tug on the sandwich.

“you'll never take it alive!” Flippy zei fighting back to keep the sandwich. In the end it ripped into pieces all over the floor. “look what u did.” Flippy said.

“get up, clean that up and help me get ready for the party!” Twilight yelled.

“never, u killed my sandwich, I only took one bite.” Flippy zei darkly.

“what do I have to do, get a whip and whip your feet until u work?” Twilight asked.

“yes.” Flippy answered.

“that was a rhetorical question.” Twilight told him.

“well there was your rhetorical answer.” Flippy said.

Twilight thought for a moment then made the chair disappear. “help, now, I hope I don't have to do this to make u save somepony's life.”

“i can sit on belegd broodje, sandwich crumbs, I can sit on anything.”

“why can't I make u do anything?” Twilight asked.

“the three possible people who are coming are three of my most frequent kills.”

“that explains a lot, well, a purple bever, beaver is coming.”

“not face cake.” Flippy mumbled.

“huh?”

“that's one of the nicknames Fliqpy gave him, another one is eye candy.”

“may I ask why?”

“he lost his eye to a lollipop, that equals eye candy and face cake comes from Fliqpy cutting part of his face off with a cake cutter.”

there was a knock on the door followed door a voice saying “i can hear u Flippy, I've been knocking for five whole minutes, it's Eye Candy.”

“does this usually happen to you?” Twilight asked while she used her magic to open the door.

“yes, usually something like this at least.” Flippy answered.

“nice to meet you, talking horse, my name is Toothy, but u can call me whatever, I've gotten used to it.” Toothy said.

“hello, and my name is Twilight Sparkle, and I'm a pony, not a horse.” Twilight introduced herself.

“do they have iPods in our country yet, Toothy?” Flippy asked.

“not yet, soon I hope, Cuddles won't shut up about how awesome they'll be.”

“well, Cuddles isn't here, he's on his skateboard somewhere.”

“sorry the party isn't set up, Flippy wouldn't stand up so we fought and u got here.” Twilight apologized to Toothy.

“no problem, I don't need a party but when Cuddles gets here he's gonna want Metallica playing on an open stage.”

“who?” Twilight asked.

“a band, of some other rock band.” Toothy answered.

“hey twilight......” Flippy said.

“yes?” Twilight asked annoyed.

“could we get Vinyl scratch in Cuddles party since there isn't a pony version of any rock bands?”

“alright, if she agrees to it.” Twilight told him.

“crap.” Toothy said

“what?” Flippy asked.

“i forgot my lollipop.”

“i could have Pinkie give you-” Twilight's sentence was interrupted door Flippy.

“NO! I don't wanna watch eye candy happen, I almost vomited from hearing about it.”

“it's just a lollipop, what's the danger?” Twilight asked.

“those things can rip your eyes out and throw them at a tree, they're meer dangerous than rocks.”

“rock aren't dangerous.” Twilight argued.

“try telling that to Fliqpy, he's used them to kill before. Also, u should avoid movie theaters when I'm there, and camping trips, and burger restaurants, and..........everywhere.”

“how many kills do u have?” Twilight asked.

“and libraries.....at least 50.”

“Cuddles found a new game.” Toothy told them.

“he's always finding them, what's it called?” Flippy asked.

“Minecraft, it's this weird blocky thing, they have pretty awesome fan made songs but other than that I don't very much care for it....hey Flippy.”

“what?”

“Halo 4.”

“there’s a guy with 4 halo's over his head, even Giggles of Flaky couldn't pull that off.”

“no, it's another game Cuddles is obsessed with, you're like a space dude and u kill aliens, he has all the halo games, reach is his favorite.”

“you know, I think instead of having a party we're just gonna play his video games with him for hours.” Flippy said.

“very likely, but I really do need a lollipop.” Toothy said.

“go to Sugarcube corner, they always have spare candy.” Twilight said.

“it ain't that easy Twilight, Toothy's a boom friend, he could die from anything, even a papercut.” Flippy told her.

“then how come no boom vrienden except Cub have died yet?” Twilight asked.

“give it time, I probably won't die though, I have a brain.”

“and knives, grenades and a parachute. Don't u only have 2 confirmed deaths?” Toothy asked.

“something close to that, the only ones who have died less than me are Cro marmot, Splendid and Lumpy.”

“i could just use a spell to get u a lollipop, why didn't I think of that?” Twilight said.

“do it, I'm hungry and I like lollipops.” Toothy said.

Twilight's horn glowed and then there was a lollipop in Toothy's hand.

“don't run with it.” Flippy warned.

“I'm in a library, why would I run?” Toothy zei walking around licking the lollipop. After a few moments, he tripped on a book.

“not again, freaking, books, I thought Spike cleaned.” Flippy said.

“Toothy stood up and tried to pull the lollipop out of his eye. “halp!”

“no.” Flippy zei flatly.“where is Twilight's slave when u need him?”

“i can use my magic.” Twilight suggested.

“no, meer pain than normal.” Flippy said.

Finally Toothy pulled the lollipop out of his eye. It flew out and landed on the highest bookshelf. “ow, why is no one HELPING ME?!”

“you'll be back buddy, trust me, u will.” Flippy said.

“you both are morons, I swear to celestia.” Twilight said.

“why am I not flipped?” Flippy asked the air.

“help, for god sakes, it hurts!!!” Toothy screamed.

“screw it, I'm done with this s@$%.” Flippy said, climbing the bookshelf.

“i can feel my brain!” Toothy screamed.

“just a second.” Flippy said, pulling out a bowie knife.

“w- what are u doing?” Toothy asked.

Flippy didn't reply. After a few moments an ear piercing scream was heard. Flippy had cut off Toothy's eye. “done, get the rest out at the hospital.”

“c- couldn't u j- just cut the rest out?” Toothy asked.

“you do it, I don't wanna be splattered with eye blood.” Flippy said.

“but I don't wanna, it hurts!” Toothy argued.

“it's gonna hurt meer if u don't cut the rest off.” Flippy told him.

“okay, give me a bowie knife.” Toothy said.

“here.” Flippy said, throwing it at him.

Toothy caught it door the handle and cut the rest of his eye out of the socket, all that remained was a bleeding hole.

“there, that wasn't so bad, was it?” Flippy asked.

“yes it was, it still is!” Toothy screamed.

“do u wanna be put out of your misery of live without an eye until u kill yourself?” Flippy asked.

“i wanna live, I hate death, I have to experience it every week!” Toothy said.

“okay, well plug up your socket of u might bleed out.” Flippy told him.

Toothy nodded and plugged up his eye socket with a wash cloth.

“now keep that there until the bleeding stops.”
Saten: Well, I should get goin-
Twi: Saten, wait.. u know how we put u as part of our group now?
Saten: What about it?
Pinkie: We need u your help., Something's coming.
Saten: (groans) What is it THIS time?

------------------------------------------------------------

Octavia: Why are Saten and the girls huddled up like that? Do we know what they're on about?
Apple Bloom: The way they're huddled up like that, I'd say it's either a friendship problem of a monster attack.
Octavia: (naively believing her) A monster attack?! Blast! I'm performing at the ceremony this afternoon, and I still haven't...
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added by NocturnalMirage
Source: facebook, joyreactor
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Video Game Troll

Starring Sean the hedgehog as Fox335
Mortomis as Kadillack
Other players in this match are real players, and are not portrayed door any actors.

Today's game: Grand Theft Auto 5

Fox335: *Driving a Red Coquette through Blaine County*
Kadillack: u know? This is the only good Grand Theft Auto game. Every other game has either bad graphics, of terrible gameplay. Usually, it's both.
klk321: Yo, you're insulting the best video game franchise ever.
Fox335: No, the best game franchise ever is Gran Turismo. u don't have to murder others just to win a race.
Audience: *Quietly laughing*...
continue reading...
posted by Seanthehedgehog
We are introduced to one of the police ponies in this fanfiction. Master Sword. He was a corporal, and wanted to be promoted, but the only way to do that was to make thirty arrests. He only needed one more.

Master Sword: Hmm, what have we here? *Sees a mare standing door a car*
Night Frizz: *Putting air into one of the tires for her car*
Master Sword: *Puts on sirens*
Night Frizz: What did I do?
Master Sword: *Talking into loudspeaker* Ma'am, u have parked too close to a brand hydrant.
Night Frizz: But I'm no where near the brand hydrant.
Master Sword: The law says u have to park ten hooves, or...
continue reading...
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: EQD, joyreactor, deviantart
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: original owners, EQD, tumblr, joyreactor
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: original owners, EQD, tumblr, joyreactor
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: original owners, EQD, tumblr, joycreator
added by tinkerbell66799
Source: Original Owners (NOT ME!!)
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Bob found Burt at the bar. He was drinking some alcohol.

Bob: Burt, may I talk to you?
Burt: Oh, sure thing Bob. What would u like to talk about?
Bob: I heard from your wife that u threatened to beat her up if u saw her again.
Burt: Yes I did. Have u seen her?
Bob: No.
Burt: Oh well. Why don't u have some drinks with me? You'll love it.
Bob: How many did u have?
Burt: Oh, about six so far.
Waiter: *Arrives* Would u like another drink?
Burt: Yes, and get one for me friend too.
Bob: Right. I want one too.
Waiter: Coming up. *Goes to get drink*
Bob: So anyway, why would u want to beat...
continue reading...
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Con ran to the parking lot where he put his car. The adaptive camouflage was still on, so no one could see it.

Con: *Gets in car* P, set up an airstrike on the Ice Hotel.
P: Roger that.
Zao: *Comes to parking lot*
Chinese Pony7: *Riding snowmobile*
Zao: *Sees snowmobile*
Chinese Pony7: *Crashes into car*
Zao: *sees crash* All units report, now!
Con: *Drives off*
Chinese Pony7: *Shooting at car*
Zao: *Runs to his car, and puts on thermal imaging* I see u now. *Activates machine gun*
Con: *Driving faster*
Zao: *Shoots at Con with machine gun*
Car: Warning: Too much damage. Adaptive Camouflage turned off....
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posted by shadowknuxgirl
Queen of Changelings: This dag is going to be perfect, the kind of dag of which I've dreamed since I was small, everypony will gather round, say I look lovely in my gown, what they don't know is that I have fooled them all!

Princess Cadence: This dag was going to be perfect, the kind of dag of which I've dreamed since I was small, but instead of having cake, with all my vrienden to celebrate, my wedding bells, they may not ring for me at all!

Queen of Changelings: I could care less about the dress, I won't partake in any cake! Vows? Well, I'll be lying when I say, that through any kind of weather,...
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added by shadowknuxgirl
Source: Me and MLP :D
added by kitmolly123
Source: spirtto on deviantArt
added by sweet_cream
Source: CSImadmax on Deviantart
added by karinabrony
added by Tawnyjay
Source: Rightful Owners
added by Tawnyjay
Source: Hasbro
added by Tawnyjay
Source: Rightful Owners
added by Tawnyjay
Source: Rightful Owners