Welcome to the block, where a group of ponies that are vrienden live on the same block in Ponyville. And now for your hosts, Master Sword, and Tom Foolery.
Audience: *Cheering*
Master Sword & Tom: *Standing in front of a house*
Master Sword: hallo everypony.
Audience: *Clapping*
Tom: Remember in the vorige episode how u zei we might get killed door assassins working for Warner Brothers?
Audience: *Laughing*
Master Sword: Yes.
Tom: Well that happened to me.
Master Sword: Okay. How are u still alive?
Tom: Now wait a minute. Did I say that I died? No! u have to listen man.
Audience: *Laughing*
Master Sword: *Confused* Weird, but whatever. Today's crossover parody is The Derpy Files.
Tom: Featuring Derpy taking Jim Rockford's role in the T.V show, The Rockford Files. Be prepared for some strange vragen if u get caught, of arrested.
Audience: *Laughing*
Somewhere at Derpy's trailer home, a phone starts to ring, and it goes to voicemail.
Derpy: This is Derpy Hooves. At the tone, leave your name, and message. I'll get back to you.
Unknown Pony: How in the world did u become a detective? You're too retarded, your eyesight is bad, and the only thing u give a damn about are muffins!
The Derpy Files
Starring Derpy Hooves as herself
Heartsong as Suzanne Hooves
Saten Twist as Tom Selleck
Mortomis as Officer McManis
Sophie Shimmer as Bail O' Cotton
Derpy was in the middle of chasing Bail O' Cotton. She was responsible for kidnapping a famous pony.
Bail: *Driving on a bridge*
Derpy: *Following Bail*
The green screen behind Derpy's car made it look like she was going forward, then backwards.
Audience: *Laughing*
Bail: *Drifts left*
Derpy: *Goes left*
Bail: She's catching up. I must go faster!
The green screen behind Bail's car made it look like she was going slower.
Audience: *Laughing*
Derpy: *About to ram the back of Bail's car*
Bail: *Goes right*
Derpy: *Looking at green screen* Why is it making me go sideways?
Audience: *Laughing*
Derpy: Okay, cut!
TV Ponies: *Turning off equipment, and turning lights on*
Derpy: Something is wrong with the green screen.
Bail: You're crosseyed! How did u figure that out?
Audience: *Laughing*
Derpy: I just did.
Tom: Hey! Can someone let me out of this car's trunk? Its smells like rotten vis in here.
Derpy: Um, sorry. We're still producing here! u gotta wait another five minutes.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: No I don't. I heard u talking about the green screen not working, and now we're not doing anything. Let me out!
Bail: No.
Tom: And I thought I got bad abuse in Celebrity Jeopardy.
Audience: *Laughing*
Derpy got to her house when she saw a police car.
Derpy: *Confused* Either my eyesight is getting better, of I'm just a crazy idiot.
Audience: *Laughing*
Derpy: *Opens door to house* Mom?
Suzanne: In here Sweetheart.
Derpy: *Arrives* What are u doing with the police?
Officer McManis: I'm sorry ma'am, but your mother has been accused of murder. I'm taking her downtown.
Derpy: Oh! I like downtown. Can I come with you?
Audience: *Laughing*
Suzanne: Not that downtown Derpy!
Derpy: hallo wait a minute. I'm a detective! I can prove that my mom has been framed, because she would never murder anypony.
Suzanne: Forget it.
Derpy: *Forgot about what her mom just said* Forget about what?
Audience: *Laughing*
Theme Song: link
Master Sword: Come on Tom, let's go meet the others.
Tom: Right behind you.
Double Scoop: *Standing on straat corner*
Aina: *Runs out of her house*
Sunny: Hey, wait for me. *Flying in the middle of the street*
Saten Twist: *Polishing his chain saw, but stops to go meet the others*
Pleiades: *Arrives at corner*
Mortomis: *Standing volgende to Double Scoop*
Tom: meer ponies!!
Snow Wonder: *Arrives in a brand new Corvette*
Cosmic Rainbow: *Flies from the clouds*
Heartsong: *Climbs out of a manhole*
Annie: *Arrives on a bicycle*
Blaze: *Flies out of a house window, and lands volgende to Tom*
Sophie Shimmer: *Gets off of a slow moving bus*
Astrel Sky: *Appears out of nowhere with magic*
All: We live together on the block!
Audience: *Clapping*
Announcer: Okay, stop the song! We need to keep this thing rolling.
Audience: *Laughing*
Episode 4: Tom, Tom, and Tom
Announcer: On The Block was filmed in front of a live audience.
Audience: *Laughing*
Announcer: This joke is getting old. Why are u still laughing at it?
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom was watching TV with Mortomis.
Tom: So what was this toon u wanted to toon me?
Mortomis: This toon I wanted to toon u is a toon that shows u a dragon named Albi, and he's actually part of a kid's toon that my little brother wanted me to watch, so I'm going to watch it here, and if I like it, I'll watch it with him.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Is that all Mort?
Audience: *Laughing*
Mortomis: I think so, yeah.
TV Announcer: We hope u enjoyed the My Little Human special, American Mares.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tv Announcer: Up volgende is a new episode of Albi The Racist Dragon.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: This is supposed to be a kid's show?
The theme song starts for the show.
Singer: In the marmelade forest.
Singer 2: Forest.
Singer: Between the make believe trees. In a cottage cheese cottage.
Audience: *Laughing*
Singer: Lives Albi.
Singers: Albi.
Singer: Albi.
Singers: Albi. Albi, the racist dragon.
Audience: *Laughing*
Narrator: Chapter 6. And so, all the villagers chased Albi the racist dragon into a very cold, and very scary cave. It was so dark, and scary there, that Albi began to cry. Dragon tears, which as we all know, turn into gelei beans.
Audience: *Laughing*
Narrator: Just then, he felt a tiny hoof on his tail. He turned around, and who should it be? But the badly burned albanian colt from the dag before.
Audience: *Laughing*
Albi: What are u doing here? I thought I killed u yesterday.
Narrator: Grumbled Albi, quite racistly.
Audience: *Laughing*
Albanian Colt: No. No Albi. u didn't kill me with your dragon flames. I crawled to safety, but I was left very badly disfigured.
Audience: *Laughing*
Narrator: Laughed the boy.
Audience: We laughed too!
Albanian Colt: Why are u crying Albi?
Albi: Well, all the villagers chased me into this scary cave. I think it's because I'm so racist. Get your hoof off my tail, you'll make it dirty.
Audience: *Laughing*
Albanian Colt: They didn't chase u hear because of your racism. They chased me here too, and I became all disfigured like this. They just don't like us. Because we're different to them.
Narrator: And at that, Albi cried a single tear that turned into a gelei bean, it had all the colors of the rainbow, and suddenly, Albi wasn't racist anymore.
Singer: So they sat in the cave.
Singer 2: The cave.
Singer: And ate bubblegum pie.
Singers: Yum.
Singer: Albi, the racist.
Albanian Colt: Albi, the racist.
Singer: Albi, the racist..
Albi: Well, not anymore.
Singers: Dragon!
The toon ends, and Mortomis has a tear come out of his eye.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: *Also has a tear come out of his eye* You're crying over a kid's show.
Mortomis: Yeah, so are you.
Audience: *Laughing*
Coming up in the volgende part is Celebrity Jeopardy.
Our cast for this skit is
Saten Twist - Alex Trebek (He wears a white wig, and his cutie mark has been changed to a game toon wheel.)
Sean the hedgehog as himself (He's a famous war hero.)
Double Scoop As Adam Sandler
and Blaze as Tom Cruise
Audience: *Clapping*
Alex: Welcome back to Celebrity Jeopardy. Once again, I'm going to recommend that our viewers watch something else.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: That said, let's take a look at the score. Sean the hedgehog is in first place with zero.
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*
Sean: You'll rue the dag u crossed me Trebek.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Fantastic. Adam Sandler is in seconde place with negative six thousand dollars.
Audience: *Cheering*
Adam: Hi. How u doing out there Alex? *Excited* Time for da Jeopardy! *Speaks like a german* I love it. Your father loves it. Your Aunt Helen watches every episode on Blu Ray.
Alex: Fantastic. And finally, Tom Cruise is in third with an incredible negative twelve thousand dollars.
Audience: *Cheering*
Alex: The negative twelve thousand dollars is from incorrectly answering a number of first round vragen meer than once.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Hey, uh- It's really great to be here Alex. *Points to Adam* Who's this guy? I love this guy. He's got the great sound effects. Also, it's a pleasure to be working with Sean the hedgehog.
Sean: *Salutes to Tom*
Alex: Right. Better luck to all of u in the volgende round. It's time for Double Jeopardy. Let's take a look at the board. The categories are.
Potent Potables
The Vowels
Presidents Who Are On The One Dollar Bill
Famous Titles
Human Children
The Number 4
And finally, Foods Beginning With Spaghett.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Tom Cruise, u are in third, so the board is yours.
Tom: I uh, hehehehe.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: I uh, hehehehe. I uh, hehehehe.
Alex: Mr. Sandler, why don't u pick?
Adam: *Angry* Once again, something that could've been brought to my ATTENTION YESTERDAY!
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Mr. The Hedgehog, go ahead.
Sean: The dag is mine!
Audience: *Laughing*
Sean: I'll take famous titties for 400.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Titles. Famous Titles.
Sean: Damn!
Alex: And the answer is, this movie titel was taken from the famous book, Gone With The Wind.
Sean: *Rings buzzer*
Alex: Mr. The Hedgehog?
Sean: Olivia de Havilland!
Wrong.
Alex: Titles Mr. The Hedgehog, not titties.
Audience: *Laughing*
Sean: Not a fan of the ladies, are u Trebek?
Audience: *Laughing*
Adam: *Rings buzzer*
Alex: Mr. Sandler?
Adam: Why are u yelling at me?
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: u rang in.
Tom: *Rings buzzer*
Alex: Mr. Cruise?
Tom: Alright, I got this. It's in my head, I know it. It's right up there, I know it. I got it.
He ran out of time.
Alex: u don't got it.
Tom: No, u don't got it!
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Get it?!
Audience: *Laughing, clapping, and whistling*
Alex: The answer of course was Gone With The Wind. Gone With The Wind. Okay, Mr. The Hedgehog it's still your board, so I'll pick a category for you. The number 4 for 200. In this category, the correct response to every vraag is 4. When I stop talking, just say the word, four. Okay, let's give it a shot. This is how many legs a pony has.
Tom: *Rings buzzer*
Alex: Mr. Cruise?
Tom: 2.
He was wrong.
Alex: No.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Ah! *Looks at his front legs* Ah! *Looks at Sean's legs* Ah! *Looks at the ground* Ah!
Audience: *Laughing*
Adam: *Rings buzzer*
Alex: Mr. Sandler?
Adam: Okay, so there was this one time, I was on a boot with some of my friends, and somepony was on the back, and he said, *Talks in german accent* Come to the back of the boat.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Time's up. Time is up. The answer was 4, every pony has 4 legs.
Sean: I'll toon u a leg Trebek!
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Okay, Mr. Cruise, u pick a category.
Tom: Help me Alex. u help me, I'll help you. u help me, I'll help you.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Okay.
Tom: Alright, I'll take Famous Titties for 800.
Audience: *Cheering, and clapping*
Sean: *Speaks in british accent* Good toon old boy.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: FAMOUS TITLES for 800. And it's an audio daily double. This song was this TV show's theme. Listen carefully.
Song: link
Tom: *Listening to music*
Adam: *Listening to music*
Sean: *Listening to music*
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: *Hearing the singers say Batman*
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: *Stops song*
Tom: I, uh...
Alex: Mr. Cruise?
Tom: What is M*A*S*H?
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: No.
Sean: *Rings buzzer* What is After M*A*S*H?
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: No.
Sean: The one with Jamie Farr!
Alex: Yes, I know.
Adam: *Rings buzzer*
Alex: Mr. Sandle- wait, where did u get a guitar?
Audience: *Laughing*
Adam: *Plays guitar* Timothy Dalton, played as Con Mane. So did Pierce Brosnan. *Stops guitar* Along with Roger Moore.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Okay, let's go to Final Jeopardy. The category is to answer this question. Where are u right now?
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: It could be Equestria, of the planet Earth.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: How about the word here?
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: of a game show. Just write down where u are right now.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: *Rings bell* Okay, let's see what u wrote down. *Goes to Tom's podium* Okay, Mr. Cruise, u wrote, go. I don't know what that means, but u wagered for it. Go for it. u certainly did.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Hehehee. Hahaha! HA!
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: *Goes to Adam* Okay. Mr. Sandler, let's see what u wrote. Abby Dooby.
Adam: *Sounding like a child* Abby Dooby, Abbyabbyabbyabbyabby.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: I feel like I want to stempel, punch you. Moving on. *Goes to Sean* Mr. The Hedgehog, u wrote. *Looks at screen* Good lord, u wrote indoors.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Are we recording this? Let's see what u wagered.
What Sean wrote made Indoors look like
Alex: I hart-, hart boobs.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Great. That is all we have for Celebrity Jeopardy, I'm going to go home, and put a gun in my mouth. Goodnight.
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*
Up volgende is the Story of Corporal Agarn.
The Story of Corporal Agarn
Theme song
Though he goes on a rage from time to time
He is a very good friend of mine
And in Fort Courage he is well known as
Corporal Agarn
Starring Master Sword as Corporal Agarn
Tom Foolery as Captain Parmenter
Saten Twist as Sargent O' Rourke
Mortomis as Dobbs, the bugler
Snow Wonder as Wrangler Jane
Cosmic regenboog as Corporal Vanderbilt
Blaze as Corporal Duffy
Vanderbilt was in the guard tower, when Dobbs, Duffy, and Agarn were near the cannon.
Duffy: We think something is wrong with the cannon.
Agarn: Why?
Dobbs: Everytime we try to shoot it, it never works. Then one of us kicks it, the left wheel falls off, then it shoots a kanon right into the guard tower.
Audience: *Laughing*
Agarn: How is that possible?
Audience: *Laughing*
Duffy: I don't know, but we never had that problem in the Alamo.
Agarn: Can u talk about anything other than the Alamo?
Audience: *Laughing*
Duffy: No. Now, if you'd like, we'll toon u that the kanon is doing what we're telling u it does.
Agarn: Alright, shoot it.
Duffy: *Puts cannonball into cannon*
Dobbs: *Lights fuse*
When the fuse got to the bottom, the kanon didn't go off.
Agarn: *Gets angry, and kicks the cannon. The left wheel falls off, and then it shoots the cannonball at Vanderbilt's tower*
Vanderbilt: *Jumps out of tower*
Audience: *Laughing*
Duffy: See sir? We need to fix the cannon.
Agarn: of we could get a new cannon.
Dobbs: But Agarn-
Agarn: I'm warning u Dobbs!
Audience: *Laughing*
Sargent O' Rourke went with Corporal Agarn to go talk to Captain Parmenter on getting a new cannon.
Parmenter: *Signing papers, but drops his pen on the floor. He starts looking for it*
Audience: *Laughing*
O' Rourke: *Arrives with Agarn* Captain, did u lose something?
Parmenter: Nope, just trying to find my pen.
Audience: *Laughing*
Agarn: Captain, we need a new cannon.
Parmenter: What's wrong with the one we have?
Audience: *Laughing*
Agarn: We'll toon you.
So Corporal Agarn, and Sargent O' Rourke took Captain Parmenter to see the cannon.
Dobbs: Back with reinforcements Agarn?
Agarn: What's that supposed to mean?!
Audience: *Laughing*
Sargent O' Rourke: We wanna toon the Captain that the kanon doesn't work properly.
Agarn: Alright, shoot it.
Duffy: *Puts cannonball into cannon*
Dobbs: *Lights fuse*
When the fuse got to the bottom, the kanon didn't go off.
Agarn: *Gets angry, and kicks the cannon. The left wheel falls off, and then it shoots the cannonball at Vanderbilt's tower*
Vanderbilt: *Jumps out of tower*
Audience: *Laughing*
Captain Parmenter: Okay, we'll get a new cannon. As soon as some of the debris from that tower gets out of my quarters.
Audience: *Laughing*
Ponies: *Singing* Though he goes on a rage from time to time, he is a very good friend of mine. And in Fort Courage he is well known as, Corporal Agarn.
Dobbs: *Playing the hoorn, bugel poorly*
Corporal Agarn: I'm warning u Dobbs!
Audience: *Laughing*
Bodyshop Ponies
Starring Sophie Shimmer as Wheel Bearing
Heartsong as Dainelle DeVito
Snow Wonder as Cutlass Supreme
Tom Foolery as Gary
Mortomis as Mr. Beddler
Pleiades as olijf-, olijf
Master Sword as Tim
and Annie as Edwina
At the bodyshop, Mr. Beddler was informing everypony about a car coming into the shop.
Mr. Beddler: Okay everypony, we're supposed to have a Prius come into the shop.
Others: Boo!!!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Mr. Beddler: I know nopony likes the Prius, but this job will be very simple. All we have to do is fix this tiny dent on the hood. Get some body filler on there, make that dent go away, spray primer, get guide coat, wet sand, and repaint it.
Olive: Can u be meer specific than just giving us generic details on our job?
Audience: *Laughing*
Mr. Beddler: u know what I mean!
Wheel Bearing: What is the driver of the Prius like?
Mr. Beddler: A very responsible young stallion with a wife, and a four jaar old son.
But the driver of the Prius was drunk, and was listening to disco on the car radio.
Audience: *Laughing*
Drunk Pony: *Gets the side of his car to scrape against a guardrail for 2 seconds*
This was the sound being made when the car was scraping itself against the guardrail: www.mediafire.com/listen/odyspw55tmz19p7/brakes+squeal.mp3
Drunk Pony: *Opens door which falls off*
Audience: *Laughing*
Drunk Pony: *Looking at damage* Oh shit!! *Looking at bodyshop* What a coincidence, a bodyshop that will fix my car. *Gets back into his car, and drives towards the bodyshop while getting in somepony else's way*
Ponies: *Stop their cars, and honk their horns*
Drunk Pony: *Drives slowly into bodyshop, and hits a car lift*
Audience: *Laughing*
Danielle: Something tells me that the Prius is here.
Mr. Beddler: *Runs from info room to shop, and sees the damage* What the hell is this?!
Drunk Pony: It's my car.
Audience: *Laughing*
Mr. Beddler: I know it's your car, but why did u crash into the lift?
Drunk Pony: *Looking at his car* I crashed? When?
Audience: *Laughing*
Drunk Pony: My insurance company won't like hearing about this.
Mr. Beddler: Yeah, well OSHA ain't gonna be too happy to hear about what u did to this lift.
Drunk Pony: That's a lift?
Audience: *Laughing*
Mr. Beddler: You're an idiot. Get your car out of here.
Drunk Pony: But I need somepony to take care of the hood.
Mr. Beddler: After what u just did, the kap is not the only thing in need of repairs. The front bumper, the headlights, even the front windshield. u messed all of that up when u crashed into this lift.
Drunk Pony: Hold up. Can u repeat that? I was too busy thinking about getting drunk.
Audience: *Laughing*
After the drunk pony got back in his car, and drove away, Mr. Beddler went back to his employees.
Mr. Beddler: The Prius is gone.
Gary: What a relief.
Audience: *Laughing*
Mr. Beddler: But the car lift has been destroyed.
Cutlass Supreme: That was the only one we had!
Danielle: He died in the line of duty!
Audience: *Laughing*
Mr. Beddler: We'll get it fixed. Somehow.
Olive: You're giving us generic details again.
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*
Mr. Beddler: *Becomes unconscious, and falls on floor*
Audience: *Laughing*
Up next, it's another Celestia skit.
Princess Celestia
Starring Celestia, Luna, Twilight, and Derpy as theirselves
Blaze as Jonathan (For this skit, he's bald.)
Cosmic regenboog as Chrysler (For this skit, he has a mustache.)
Mortomis as Bryan
Saten Twist as Timothy
Double Scoop as Skeletor
Master Sword as Harry
Sophie Shimmer as Alexis
Astrel Sky as Jenny
Lots of ponies were gathering at the main hall in Celestia's castle.
Bryan: *With Harry* There seems to be a lot of ponies that want to compete in this event.
Harry: *Carrying a glass of champagne* Nonsense. Absolute nonsense. The worst part is that I got invited.
Audience: *Laughing*
Harry: *Drinks champagne*
Twilight: *With Luna* Man, I'm gonna own everypony with my badass drivin' skills.
Luna: u got a big mouth, but remember that I'm only here to fill in a position. *Whispers* I've heard from Jenny that Princess Celestia has been insulting everypony here. She says that she will shove red shells up everypony's plots.
Twilight: Man, Jenny must be goin' deaf. Dat job belongs to me.
Meanwhile in Celestia's office.
Derpy: You're groundbeef.
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: u really think u can make insults better then me? Get that trash out of here! Here's how it's done, behold! I'm going to shove my hoof so far up your ass, that u will be puking out my horseshoe polish, into Europe.
Audience: *Laughing*
At Ponyville
Celestia Guard: *Driving truck with loudspeaker on the roof* Be prepared for Celestia's very first Super Kart Race, taking place at the Canterlot Raceway near her castle. Tickets are ten dollars each, and they can only be purchased online.
Applejack: That's bullshit! I'm too poor to have the internet!
Audience: *Laughing*
The volgende day, Celestia, Derpy, Twilight, Luna, Jenny, Bryan, Harry, Chrysler, and Alexis were participating in the race. It was just like Mario Kart.
Audience: *Laughing*
Lakitu: *Holding a traffic light. The light turns red*
Racers: *Waiting for light to turn green*
Lakitu: *Changes light to yellow, and after five seconds, he changes it back to red*
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: Oh, for crying out loud! Start the race!
Lakitu: *Turns light green*
Everypony took off really fast past the starting line.. Except for Celestia. Her kart went five miles an hour, and broke down.
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: u have got to be kidding.
Twilight: *In first place*
Luna: *About to pass Twilight, but slows down for the turn up ahead*
Twilight: *Turns right, and picks up a green shell* Who shall be my very first victim? *Shoots green shell backwards*
Derpy: *Looking at green shell* How pretty. *Drives into green shell*
Her kart went flying into a house where everypony was dancing.
Audience: *Laughing*
Harry: *Very drunk, and crashes into Chrysler*
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: *Trying to get her kart to start* This is a sack load of human shit.
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: Why must all the bad things happen to me?
Audience: *Laughing*
Twilight: *Dominating the race*
Jenny: *Drops bomb*
Luna: *Drives into bomb* I don't wanna get sent back to the moon!
Audience: *Laughing*
Jenny: *About to pass Twilight* Why don't u taste my fury? Take this! *Crashes into warp pipe*
Audience: *Laughing*
Twilight: Nigga please.
Audience: *Cheering, and clapping*
Celestia: *Gets her kart started* What the hell took so long?! It's about time-
Twilight: Get out of the way! *Crashes into Celestia's kart*
Audience: *Laughing*
Alexis: *Gets a blue shell, and shoots it at Twilight*
Celestia: *Gets a star* Now u will all taste my wrath! *Crashing into everypony*
Twilight: Man, your powers are good, but mine are better. *Gets a powerup, and is now driving a sports car*
Audience: *Laughing*
Twilight: Introducing the Twilight Mobile. *Gets a power up*
Car: Defense mechanisms, on.
Twilight: *Shoots raket at Alexis*
Alexis: *Gets hit door missile*
Twilight: Vengeance! Would anypony else like their plot to be kicked?
Derpy: Did everypony forget about me? *Driving a tank*
Audience: *Clapping*
Celestia: *Sees Derpy's tank* What's that?!!!?
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: This isn't a race anymore! It's a combination of screw ups, and insanity!
Twilight: *Drops banaan peel*
Derpy: Do u really think that'll stop me? *Drives over banaan peel, and gets her tank to land on it's side*
Audience: *Laughing*
Twilight won the race.
Celestia: *Very angry* Derpy u unreliable dumbass!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Two hours later.
Derpy: *Walks into Celestia's office, and sees Celestia at her desk* It appears Twilight Sparkle won the Super Celestia Kart. What is your opinion?
Celestia: You're actually gonna tell me that you're surprised door this? But let's talk about you! u had a battletank! Idiot!
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: u had an opportunity to win, but u allowed yourself to get beaten door a Mary Sue. u suck!
Audience: Don't be mean to Derpy!
Celestia: Go to timeout for your imcompetence! *Bangs on desk* TIMEOUT!
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: *Banging on desk* Timeout! Timeout!
Back on the block.
Master Sword: Well, this has been yet another good episode.
Tom: And we had three Toms. Me, Tom Selleck played door Saten Twist, and Tom Cruise, played door Blaze.
Master Sword: There were two other Tom's here?
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Yeah.
Master Sword: How come one of them wasn't Thomas The Tank Engine?!
Tom: He's on an island, and has no way to get here.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: And now, we're starting a new segment on this toon that we like to call, brony of the month.
Master Sword: And for November's Brony of the month, we start it off with ladies first. The Brony of the maand reward goes to Dragonaura15!
Audience: *Cheering*
Tom: She really deserves it. Dragonaura15 is one of the kindest pegasisters ever.
Master Sword: One of the kindest? She's nicer than anyone I know. She is the #1 pegasister ever! Congratulations girl!
Audience: *Clapping*
And now, it's the end.
Copyright 2014. STH/AM6663 fan Fictions
Audience: *Cheering*
Master Sword & Tom: *Standing in front of a house*
Master Sword: hallo everypony.
Audience: *Clapping*
Tom: Remember in the vorige episode how u zei we might get killed door assassins working for Warner Brothers?
Audience: *Laughing*
Master Sword: Yes.
Tom: Well that happened to me.
Master Sword: Okay. How are u still alive?
Tom: Now wait a minute. Did I say that I died? No! u have to listen man.
Audience: *Laughing*
Master Sword: *Confused* Weird, but whatever. Today's crossover parody is The Derpy Files.
Tom: Featuring Derpy taking Jim Rockford's role in the T.V show, The Rockford Files. Be prepared for some strange vragen if u get caught, of arrested.
Audience: *Laughing*
Somewhere at Derpy's trailer home, a phone starts to ring, and it goes to voicemail.
Derpy: This is Derpy Hooves. At the tone, leave your name, and message. I'll get back to you.
Unknown Pony: How in the world did u become a detective? You're too retarded, your eyesight is bad, and the only thing u give a damn about are muffins!
The Derpy Files
Starring Derpy Hooves as herself
Heartsong as Suzanne Hooves
Saten Twist as Tom Selleck
Mortomis as Officer McManis
Sophie Shimmer as Bail O' Cotton
Derpy was in the middle of chasing Bail O' Cotton. She was responsible for kidnapping a famous pony.
Bail: *Driving on a bridge*
Derpy: *Following Bail*
The green screen behind Derpy's car made it look like she was going forward, then backwards.
Audience: *Laughing*
Bail: *Drifts left*
Derpy: *Goes left*
Bail: She's catching up. I must go faster!
The green screen behind Bail's car made it look like she was going slower.
Audience: *Laughing*
Derpy: *About to ram the back of Bail's car*
Bail: *Goes right*
Derpy: *Looking at green screen* Why is it making me go sideways?
Audience: *Laughing*
Derpy: Okay, cut!
TV Ponies: *Turning off equipment, and turning lights on*
Derpy: Something is wrong with the green screen.
Bail: You're crosseyed! How did u figure that out?
Audience: *Laughing*
Derpy: I just did.
Tom: Hey! Can someone let me out of this car's trunk? Its smells like rotten vis in here.
Derpy: Um, sorry. We're still producing here! u gotta wait another five minutes.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: No I don't. I heard u talking about the green screen not working, and now we're not doing anything. Let me out!
Bail: No.
Tom: And I thought I got bad abuse in Celebrity Jeopardy.
Audience: *Laughing*
Derpy got to her house when she saw a police car.
Derpy: *Confused* Either my eyesight is getting better, of I'm just a crazy idiot.
Audience: *Laughing*
Derpy: *Opens door to house* Mom?
Suzanne: In here Sweetheart.
Derpy: *Arrives* What are u doing with the police?
Officer McManis: I'm sorry ma'am, but your mother has been accused of murder. I'm taking her downtown.
Derpy: Oh! I like downtown. Can I come with you?
Audience: *Laughing*
Suzanne: Not that downtown Derpy!
Derpy: hallo wait a minute. I'm a detective! I can prove that my mom has been framed, because she would never murder anypony.
Suzanne: Forget it.
Derpy: *Forgot about what her mom just said* Forget about what?
Audience: *Laughing*
Theme Song: link
Master Sword: Come on Tom, let's go meet the others.
Tom: Right behind you.
Double Scoop: *Standing on straat corner*
Aina: *Runs out of her house*
Sunny: Hey, wait for me. *Flying in the middle of the street*
Saten Twist: *Polishing his chain saw, but stops to go meet the others*
Pleiades: *Arrives at corner*
Mortomis: *Standing volgende to Double Scoop*
Tom: meer ponies!!
Snow Wonder: *Arrives in a brand new Corvette*
Cosmic Rainbow: *Flies from the clouds*
Heartsong: *Climbs out of a manhole*
Annie: *Arrives on a bicycle*
Blaze: *Flies out of a house window, and lands volgende to Tom*
Sophie Shimmer: *Gets off of a slow moving bus*
Astrel Sky: *Appears out of nowhere with magic*
All: We live together on the block!
Audience: *Clapping*
Announcer: Okay, stop the song! We need to keep this thing rolling.
Audience: *Laughing*
Episode 4: Tom, Tom, and Tom
Announcer: On The Block was filmed in front of a live audience.
Audience: *Laughing*
Announcer: This joke is getting old. Why are u still laughing at it?
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom was watching TV with Mortomis.
Tom: So what was this toon u wanted to toon me?
Mortomis: This toon I wanted to toon u is a toon that shows u a dragon named Albi, and he's actually part of a kid's toon that my little brother wanted me to watch, so I'm going to watch it here, and if I like it, I'll watch it with him.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Is that all Mort?
Audience: *Laughing*
Mortomis: I think so, yeah.
TV Announcer: We hope u enjoyed the My Little Human special, American Mares.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tv Announcer: Up volgende is a new episode of Albi The Racist Dragon.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: This is supposed to be a kid's show?
The theme song starts for the show.
Singer: In the marmelade forest.
Singer 2: Forest.
Singer: Between the make believe trees. In a cottage cheese cottage.
Audience: *Laughing*
Singer: Lives Albi.
Singers: Albi.
Singer: Albi.
Singers: Albi. Albi, the racist dragon.
Audience: *Laughing*
Narrator: Chapter 6. And so, all the villagers chased Albi the racist dragon into a very cold, and very scary cave. It was so dark, and scary there, that Albi began to cry. Dragon tears, which as we all know, turn into gelei beans.
Audience: *Laughing*
Narrator: Just then, he felt a tiny hoof on his tail. He turned around, and who should it be? But the badly burned albanian colt from the dag before.
Audience: *Laughing*
Albi: What are u doing here? I thought I killed u yesterday.
Narrator: Grumbled Albi, quite racistly.
Audience: *Laughing*
Albanian Colt: No. No Albi. u didn't kill me with your dragon flames. I crawled to safety, but I was left very badly disfigured.
Audience: *Laughing*
Narrator: Laughed the boy.
Audience: We laughed too!
Albanian Colt: Why are u crying Albi?
Albi: Well, all the villagers chased me into this scary cave. I think it's because I'm so racist. Get your hoof off my tail, you'll make it dirty.
Audience: *Laughing*
Albanian Colt: They didn't chase u hear because of your racism. They chased me here too, and I became all disfigured like this. They just don't like us. Because we're different to them.
Narrator: And at that, Albi cried a single tear that turned into a gelei bean, it had all the colors of the rainbow, and suddenly, Albi wasn't racist anymore.
Singer: So they sat in the cave.
Singer 2: The cave.
Singer: And ate bubblegum pie.
Singers: Yum.
Singer: Albi, the racist.
Albanian Colt: Albi, the racist.
Singer: Albi, the racist..
Albi: Well, not anymore.
Singers: Dragon!
The toon ends, and Mortomis has a tear come out of his eye.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: *Also has a tear come out of his eye* You're crying over a kid's show.
Mortomis: Yeah, so are you.
Audience: *Laughing*
Coming up in the volgende part is Celebrity Jeopardy.
Our cast for this skit is
Saten Twist - Alex Trebek (He wears a white wig, and his cutie mark has been changed to a game toon wheel.)
Sean the hedgehog as himself (He's a famous war hero.)
Double Scoop As Adam Sandler
and Blaze as Tom Cruise
Audience: *Clapping*
Alex: Welcome back to Celebrity Jeopardy. Once again, I'm going to recommend that our viewers watch something else.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: That said, let's take a look at the score. Sean the hedgehog is in first place with zero.
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*
Sean: You'll rue the dag u crossed me Trebek.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Fantastic. Adam Sandler is in seconde place with negative six thousand dollars.
Audience: *Cheering*
Adam: Hi. How u doing out there Alex? *Excited* Time for da Jeopardy! *Speaks like a german* I love it. Your father loves it. Your Aunt Helen watches every episode on Blu Ray.
Alex: Fantastic. And finally, Tom Cruise is in third with an incredible negative twelve thousand dollars.
Audience: *Cheering*
Alex: The negative twelve thousand dollars is from incorrectly answering a number of first round vragen meer than once.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Hey, uh- It's really great to be here Alex. *Points to Adam* Who's this guy? I love this guy. He's got the great sound effects. Also, it's a pleasure to be working with Sean the hedgehog.
Sean: *Salutes to Tom*
Alex: Right. Better luck to all of u in the volgende round. It's time for Double Jeopardy. Let's take a look at the board. The categories are.
Potent Potables
The Vowels
Presidents Who Are On The One Dollar Bill
Famous Titles
Human Children
The Number 4
And finally, Foods Beginning With Spaghett.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Tom Cruise, u are in third, so the board is yours.
Tom: I uh, hehehehe.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: I uh, hehehehe. I uh, hehehehe.
Alex: Mr. Sandler, why don't u pick?
Adam: *Angry* Once again, something that could've been brought to my ATTENTION YESTERDAY!
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Mr. The Hedgehog, go ahead.
Sean: The dag is mine!
Audience: *Laughing*
Sean: I'll take famous titties for 400.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Titles. Famous Titles.
Sean: Damn!
Alex: And the answer is, this movie titel was taken from the famous book, Gone With The Wind.
Sean: *Rings buzzer*
Alex: Mr. The Hedgehog?
Sean: Olivia de Havilland!
Wrong.
Alex: Titles Mr. The Hedgehog, not titties.
Audience: *Laughing*
Sean: Not a fan of the ladies, are u Trebek?
Audience: *Laughing*
Adam: *Rings buzzer*
Alex: Mr. Sandler?
Adam: Why are u yelling at me?
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: u rang in.
Tom: *Rings buzzer*
Alex: Mr. Cruise?
Tom: Alright, I got this. It's in my head, I know it. It's right up there, I know it. I got it.
He ran out of time.
Alex: u don't got it.
Tom: No, u don't got it!
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Get it?!
Audience: *Laughing, clapping, and whistling*
Alex: The answer of course was Gone With The Wind. Gone With The Wind. Okay, Mr. The Hedgehog it's still your board, so I'll pick a category for you. The number 4 for 200. In this category, the correct response to every vraag is 4. When I stop talking, just say the word, four. Okay, let's give it a shot. This is how many legs a pony has.
Tom: *Rings buzzer*
Alex: Mr. Cruise?
Tom: 2.
He was wrong.
Alex: No.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Ah! *Looks at his front legs* Ah! *Looks at Sean's legs* Ah! *Looks at the ground* Ah!
Audience: *Laughing*
Adam: *Rings buzzer*
Alex: Mr. Sandler?
Adam: Okay, so there was this one time, I was on a boot with some of my friends, and somepony was on the back, and he said, *Talks in german accent* Come to the back of the boat.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Time's up. Time is up. The answer was 4, every pony has 4 legs.
Sean: I'll toon u a leg Trebek!
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Okay, Mr. Cruise, u pick a category.
Tom: Help me Alex. u help me, I'll help you. u help me, I'll help you.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Okay.
Tom: Alright, I'll take Famous Titties for 800.
Audience: *Cheering, and clapping*
Sean: *Speaks in british accent* Good toon old boy.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: FAMOUS TITLES for 800. And it's an audio daily double. This song was this TV show's theme. Listen carefully.
Song: link
Tom: *Listening to music*
Adam: *Listening to music*
Sean: *Listening to music*
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: *Hearing the singers say Batman*
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: *Stops song*
Tom: I, uh...
Alex: Mr. Cruise?
Tom: What is M*A*S*H?
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: No.
Sean: *Rings buzzer* What is After M*A*S*H?
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: No.
Sean: The one with Jamie Farr!
Alex: Yes, I know.
Adam: *Rings buzzer*
Alex: Mr. Sandle- wait, where did u get a guitar?
Audience: *Laughing*
Adam: *Plays guitar* Timothy Dalton, played as Con Mane. So did Pierce Brosnan. *Stops guitar* Along with Roger Moore.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Okay, let's go to Final Jeopardy. The category is to answer this question. Where are u right now?
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: It could be Equestria, of the planet Earth.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: How about the word here?
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: of a game show. Just write down where u are right now.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: *Rings bell* Okay, let's see what u wrote down. *Goes to Tom's podium* Okay, Mr. Cruise, u wrote, go. I don't know what that means, but u wagered for it. Go for it. u certainly did.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Hehehee. Hahaha! HA!
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: *Goes to Adam* Okay. Mr. Sandler, let's see what u wrote. Abby Dooby.
Adam: *Sounding like a child* Abby Dooby, Abbyabbyabbyabbyabby.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: I feel like I want to stempel, punch you. Moving on. *Goes to Sean* Mr. The Hedgehog, u wrote. *Looks at screen* Good lord, u wrote indoors.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Are we recording this? Let's see what u wagered.
What Sean wrote made Indoors look like
Alex: I hart-, hart boobs.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Great. That is all we have for Celebrity Jeopardy, I'm going to go home, and put a gun in my mouth. Goodnight.
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*
Up volgende is the Story of Corporal Agarn.
The Story of Corporal Agarn
Theme song
Though he goes on a rage from time to time
He is a very good friend of mine
And in Fort Courage he is well known as
Corporal Agarn
Starring Master Sword as Corporal Agarn
Tom Foolery as Captain Parmenter
Saten Twist as Sargent O' Rourke
Mortomis as Dobbs, the bugler
Snow Wonder as Wrangler Jane
Cosmic regenboog as Corporal Vanderbilt
Blaze as Corporal Duffy
Vanderbilt was in the guard tower, when Dobbs, Duffy, and Agarn were near the cannon.
Duffy: We think something is wrong with the cannon.
Agarn: Why?
Dobbs: Everytime we try to shoot it, it never works. Then one of us kicks it, the left wheel falls off, then it shoots a kanon right into the guard tower.
Audience: *Laughing*
Agarn: How is that possible?
Audience: *Laughing*
Duffy: I don't know, but we never had that problem in the Alamo.
Agarn: Can u talk about anything other than the Alamo?
Audience: *Laughing*
Duffy: No. Now, if you'd like, we'll toon u that the kanon is doing what we're telling u it does.
Agarn: Alright, shoot it.
Duffy: *Puts cannonball into cannon*
Dobbs: *Lights fuse*
When the fuse got to the bottom, the kanon didn't go off.
Agarn: *Gets angry, and kicks the cannon. The left wheel falls off, and then it shoots the cannonball at Vanderbilt's tower*
Vanderbilt: *Jumps out of tower*
Audience: *Laughing*
Duffy: See sir? We need to fix the cannon.
Agarn: of we could get a new cannon.
Dobbs: But Agarn-
Agarn: I'm warning u Dobbs!
Audience: *Laughing*
Sargent O' Rourke went with Corporal Agarn to go talk to Captain Parmenter on getting a new cannon.
Parmenter: *Signing papers, but drops his pen on the floor. He starts looking for it*
Audience: *Laughing*
O' Rourke: *Arrives with Agarn* Captain, did u lose something?
Parmenter: Nope, just trying to find my pen.
Audience: *Laughing*
Agarn: Captain, we need a new cannon.
Parmenter: What's wrong with the one we have?
Audience: *Laughing*
Agarn: We'll toon you.
So Corporal Agarn, and Sargent O' Rourke took Captain Parmenter to see the cannon.
Dobbs: Back with reinforcements Agarn?
Agarn: What's that supposed to mean?!
Audience: *Laughing*
Sargent O' Rourke: We wanna toon the Captain that the kanon doesn't work properly.
Agarn: Alright, shoot it.
Duffy: *Puts cannonball into cannon*
Dobbs: *Lights fuse*
When the fuse got to the bottom, the kanon didn't go off.
Agarn: *Gets angry, and kicks the cannon. The left wheel falls off, and then it shoots the cannonball at Vanderbilt's tower*
Vanderbilt: *Jumps out of tower*
Audience: *Laughing*
Captain Parmenter: Okay, we'll get a new cannon. As soon as some of the debris from that tower gets out of my quarters.
Audience: *Laughing*
Ponies: *Singing* Though he goes on a rage from time to time, he is a very good friend of mine. And in Fort Courage he is well known as, Corporal Agarn.
Dobbs: *Playing the hoorn, bugel poorly*
Corporal Agarn: I'm warning u Dobbs!
Audience: *Laughing*
Bodyshop Ponies
Starring Sophie Shimmer as Wheel Bearing
Heartsong as Dainelle DeVito
Snow Wonder as Cutlass Supreme
Tom Foolery as Gary
Mortomis as Mr. Beddler
Pleiades as olijf-, olijf
Master Sword as Tim
and Annie as Edwina
At the bodyshop, Mr. Beddler was informing everypony about a car coming into the shop.
Mr. Beddler: Okay everypony, we're supposed to have a Prius come into the shop.
Others: Boo!!!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Mr. Beddler: I know nopony likes the Prius, but this job will be very simple. All we have to do is fix this tiny dent on the hood. Get some body filler on there, make that dent go away, spray primer, get guide coat, wet sand, and repaint it.
Olive: Can u be meer specific than just giving us generic details on our job?
Audience: *Laughing*
Mr. Beddler: u know what I mean!
Wheel Bearing: What is the driver of the Prius like?
Mr. Beddler: A very responsible young stallion with a wife, and a four jaar old son.
But the driver of the Prius was drunk, and was listening to disco on the car radio.
Audience: *Laughing*
Drunk Pony: *Gets the side of his car to scrape against a guardrail for 2 seconds*
This was the sound being made when the car was scraping itself against the guardrail: www.mediafire.com/listen/odyspw55tmz19p7/brakes+squeal.mp3
Drunk Pony: *Opens door which falls off*
Audience: *Laughing*
Drunk Pony: *Looking at damage* Oh shit!! *Looking at bodyshop* What a coincidence, a bodyshop that will fix my car. *Gets back into his car, and drives towards the bodyshop while getting in somepony else's way*
Ponies: *Stop their cars, and honk their horns*
Drunk Pony: *Drives slowly into bodyshop, and hits a car lift*
Audience: *Laughing*
Danielle: Something tells me that the Prius is here.
Mr. Beddler: *Runs from info room to shop, and sees the damage* What the hell is this?!
Drunk Pony: It's my car.
Audience: *Laughing*
Mr. Beddler: I know it's your car, but why did u crash into the lift?
Drunk Pony: *Looking at his car* I crashed? When?
Audience: *Laughing*
Drunk Pony: My insurance company won't like hearing about this.
Mr. Beddler: Yeah, well OSHA ain't gonna be too happy to hear about what u did to this lift.
Drunk Pony: That's a lift?
Audience: *Laughing*
Mr. Beddler: You're an idiot. Get your car out of here.
Drunk Pony: But I need somepony to take care of the hood.
Mr. Beddler: After what u just did, the kap is not the only thing in need of repairs. The front bumper, the headlights, even the front windshield. u messed all of that up when u crashed into this lift.
Drunk Pony: Hold up. Can u repeat that? I was too busy thinking about getting drunk.
Audience: *Laughing*
After the drunk pony got back in his car, and drove away, Mr. Beddler went back to his employees.
Mr. Beddler: The Prius is gone.
Gary: What a relief.
Audience: *Laughing*
Mr. Beddler: But the car lift has been destroyed.
Cutlass Supreme: That was the only one we had!
Danielle: He died in the line of duty!
Audience: *Laughing*
Mr. Beddler: We'll get it fixed. Somehow.
Olive: You're giving us generic details again.
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*
Mr. Beddler: *Becomes unconscious, and falls on floor*
Audience: *Laughing*
Up next, it's another Celestia skit.
Princess Celestia
Starring Celestia, Luna, Twilight, and Derpy as theirselves
Blaze as Jonathan (For this skit, he's bald.)
Cosmic regenboog as Chrysler (For this skit, he has a mustache.)
Mortomis as Bryan
Saten Twist as Timothy
Double Scoop as Skeletor
Master Sword as Harry
Sophie Shimmer as Alexis
Astrel Sky as Jenny
Lots of ponies were gathering at the main hall in Celestia's castle.
Bryan: *With Harry* There seems to be a lot of ponies that want to compete in this event.
Harry: *Carrying a glass of champagne* Nonsense. Absolute nonsense. The worst part is that I got invited.
Audience: *Laughing*
Harry: *Drinks champagne*
Twilight: *With Luna* Man, I'm gonna own everypony with my badass drivin' skills.
Luna: u got a big mouth, but remember that I'm only here to fill in a position. *Whispers* I've heard from Jenny that Princess Celestia has been insulting everypony here. She says that she will shove red shells up everypony's plots.
Twilight: Man, Jenny must be goin' deaf. Dat job belongs to me.
Meanwhile in Celestia's office.
Derpy: You're groundbeef.
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: u really think u can make insults better then me? Get that trash out of here! Here's how it's done, behold! I'm going to shove my hoof so far up your ass, that u will be puking out my horseshoe polish, into Europe.
Audience: *Laughing*
At Ponyville
Celestia Guard: *Driving truck with loudspeaker on the roof* Be prepared for Celestia's very first Super Kart Race, taking place at the Canterlot Raceway near her castle. Tickets are ten dollars each, and they can only be purchased online.
Applejack: That's bullshit! I'm too poor to have the internet!
Audience: *Laughing*
The volgende day, Celestia, Derpy, Twilight, Luna, Jenny, Bryan, Harry, Chrysler, and Alexis were participating in the race. It was just like Mario Kart.
Audience: *Laughing*
Lakitu: *Holding a traffic light. The light turns red*
Racers: *Waiting for light to turn green*
Lakitu: *Changes light to yellow, and after five seconds, he changes it back to red*
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: Oh, for crying out loud! Start the race!
Lakitu: *Turns light green*
Everypony took off really fast past the starting line.. Except for Celestia. Her kart went five miles an hour, and broke down.
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: u have got to be kidding.
Twilight: *In first place*
Luna: *About to pass Twilight, but slows down for the turn up ahead*
Twilight: *Turns right, and picks up a green shell* Who shall be my very first victim? *Shoots green shell backwards*
Derpy: *Looking at green shell* How pretty. *Drives into green shell*
Her kart went flying into a house where everypony was dancing.
Audience: *Laughing*
Harry: *Very drunk, and crashes into Chrysler*
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: *Trying to get her kart to start* This is a sack load of human shit.
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: Why must all the bad things happen to me?
Audience: *Laughing*
Twilight: *Dominating the race*
Jenny: *Drops bomb*
Luna: *Drives into bomb* I don't wanna get sent back to the moon!
Audience: *Laughing*
Jenny: *About to pass Twilight* Why don't u taste my fury? Take this! *Crashes into warp pipe*
Audience: *Laughing*
Twilight: Nigga please.
Audience: *Cheering, and clapping*
Celestia: *Gets her kart started* What the hell took so long?! It's about time-
Twilight: Get out of the way! *Crashes into Celestia's kart*
Audience: *Laughing*
Alexis: *Gets a blue shell, and shoots it at Twilight*
Celestia: *Gets a star* Now u will all taste my wrath! *Crashing into everypony*
Twilight: Man, your powers are good, but mine are better. *Gets a powerup, and is now driving a sports car*
Audience: *Laughing*
Twilight: Introducing the Twilight Mobile. *Gets a power up*
Car: Defense mechanisms, on.
Twilight: *Shoots raket at Alexis*
Alexis: *Gets hit door missile*
Twilight: Vengeance! Would anypony else like their plot to be kicked?
Derpy: Did everypony forget about me? *Driving a tank*
Audience: *Clapping*
Celestia: *Sees Derpy's tank* What's that?!!!?
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: This isn't a race anymore! It's a combination of screw ups, and insanity!
Twilight: *Drops banaan peel*
Derpy: Do u really think that'll stop me? *Drives over banaan peel, and gets her tank to land on it's side*
Audience: *Laughing*
Twilight won the race.
Celestia: *Very angry* Derpy u unreliable dumbass!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Two hours later.
Derpy: *Walks into Celestia's office, and sees Celestia at her desk* It appears Twilight Sparkle won the Super Celestia Kart. What is your opinion?
Celestia: You're actually gonna tell me that you're surprised door this? But let's talk about you! u had a battletank! Idiot!
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: u had an opportunity to win, but u allowed yourself to get beaten door a Mary Sue. u suck!
Audience: Don't be mean to Derpy!
Celestia: Go to timeout for your imcompetence! *Bangs on desk* TIMEOUT!
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: *Banging on desk* Timeout! Timeout!
Back on the block.
Master Sword: Well, this has been yet another good episode.
Tom: And we had three Toms. Me, Tom Selleck played door Saten Twist, and Tom Cruise, played door Blaze.
Master Sword: There were two other Tom's here?
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Yeah.
Master Sword: How come one of them wasn't Thomas The Tank Engine?!
Tom: He's on an island, and has no way to get here.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: And now, we're starting a new segment on this toon that we like to call, brony of the month.
Master Sword: And for November's Brony of the month, we start it off with ladies first. The Brony of the maand reward goes to Dragonaura15!
Audience: *Cheering*
Tom: She really deserves it. Dragonaura15 is one of the kindest pegasisters ever.
Master Sword: One of the kindest? She's nicer than anyone I know. She is the #1 pegasister ever! Congratulations girl!
Audience: *Clapping*
And now, it's the end.
Copyright 2014. STH/AM6663 fan Fictions
Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see.
