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Why did the chicken kruis the road?

BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for change! The chicken wanted change!

JOHN MCCAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he was a maverick chicken, and he wanted to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.

SARAH PALIN: The chicken had to kruis the road because he was not able to find a bridge. Alaskans do not build bridges to nowhere. If he wanted a bridge, he'd have to build it himself.

JOE BIDEN: The chicken crossed the road because he was heading back to Scranton .

HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken kruis the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure right from dag One that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to kruis the road. But then, this really isn't about me.

GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, of not. The chicken is either for us of against us. There is no middle ground here.

DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun?

COLIN POWELL: Now, to the left of the screen, u can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.

BILL CLINTON: I did not kruis the road with that chicken. What is your definition of chicken?

AL GORE: I invented the chicken.

JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken kruis the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.

DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting door not taking on his current problems before adding new problems.

OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to kruis this road so bad.So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

ANDERSON COOPER, CNN: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's guilty! u can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a cert ain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

DR SEUSS: Did the chicken kruis the road? Did he kruis it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone.

GRANDPA: In my dag we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the hart-, hart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its lifelong dream of crossing the road.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to kruis the road.

JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.

BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2008, which will not only kruis roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken2008. This new platform is much meer stable and will never reboot.

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really kruis the road, of did the road verplaats beneath the chicken?

COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?
added by Tamar20
added by Smib
added by alizoula
added by TDIlover226
Source: Various websites
added by Cliff040479
Source: http://www.flickr.com/photos/77371316@N00/72816738/
added by EminemAddict09
Source: my awesomeness
added by ladolcevita
Source: Hmmm... Um,well EW.com, Everglow, Mugglenet, me!, forgot the last
posted by Bluekait
An expert farmer is outstanding in her field.

An incompetent ship captain grounds the warship he walks on.

Camels live in Camelfornia.

Cannibals like to meat people.

Hands are like bells, especially when they're wrung.

How about the beer that was hit door an 18-wheeler and splattered all over the place? They zei it was a grizzly accident.

How about the man who ran through a screen door? He strained himself.

If life is like a bowl of cherries, what's the rozijn, rozijnen for living?

In some places fog will never be mist.

Once upon a time, a tribe of cannibals caught a saint sent to them as a missionary...
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posted by nmdis
"Solo"


You speak to me
And in your words I hear a melody
But in the twilight it's so hard to see
What's wrong for me

I can't resist
Until u give the truth a little twist
As if you're gonna get away with this
You're not sorry

I can't believe I fell for this

I fell through the hole
Down at the bottom of your soul
Didn't think u could go
So low
Look at what you've done
You're losing me
Here's what you've won
Got me planning to go
Solo
Solo

u sing to me
Too bad u couldn't even stay on key
If your life is such a mystery
Why don't u stick to acting?

Here u go again...
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posted by nmdis
"Piercing"


Living in fear
Is not what u had
In mind for me
But holding to you
Is so hard
I cling to what I see

In a world where my emotions
Seem to rule my every move
They will challenge my devotion
To seek and know the truth

You're piercing me
This self will bleed
You're killing all
Of my securities
Lord, help me see the reality
That all I'll ever need is You

Here in this haze a distant light
Seems to draw me near
But in the shadow of my doubt
My faith just disappears

In a world where my emotions
Seem to rule my every move
They will challenge my devotion
To seek and know the truth

You're...
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posted by nmdis
IceCold
She fell in love with a dope boy
Black diamonds on the neck of that dope boy
Big body Benz for that dope boy
Love every tattoo on that dope boy
She sheds tears for that dope boy
Shit, it is what it is for that dope boy
Handle minor biz for that dope boy
But the reward is major, so on and so forth
She can tell u door the Greyhound
She can toon u how to stay down
I can tell u 'bout to break down
VS1's all in my teef watch face now
Straight G's for your low esteem
A.P's for the whole team
As I run away from my obituary
Walking in the shit that'll get u buried
Miami's mine like I'm Pat Riley
Baselines...
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posted by nmdis
BEAT


It's a big bad world but I ain't ashamed,
I like the lights in my hand
And the beat in my face.
It's a big bad world but I ain't ashamed,
I like the lights in my hand
And the beat in my face.

Be-be-beat in my face, be-be-beat in my face,
The lights in my hand, and the beat in my face

Be-be-beat in my face, be-be-beat in my face,
The lights in my hand, and the beat in my face

I'mma make u bend your back
Oh my god, this beat is crack
When I do this, u do that

I feel like dancing when I hear that sound,
Just wanna do it, eh, just wanna do it, eh.
I feel like dancing when I hear that sound,
Just wanna...
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posted by nmdis
Come and Get it
[chorus]
When you're ready come and get it (x2)
Na na na (x3)

When you're re-e-a-dy (x2)

When you're ready come and get it
Na na na (x3)

You ain’t gotta worry it’s an open invitation
I’ll be sittin’ right here real patient
All dag all night I’ll be waitin’ standby
Can’t stop because I love it, hate the way I love you
All dag all night maybe I’m addicted for life, no lie.
I’m not too shy to toon I love you, I got no regrets.
I love u much to, much to hide you, this love ain’t finished yet. This love ain’t finished yet…
So baby whenever you’re ready…

[chorus]
When...
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Chapter One: Salvador

Silver Monroe skipped up the stone steps to Westover High School. Silver could have easily gotten almost any boy she wanted; only she had yet to find the one meant for her. She walked swiftly down the long hallways to her first class; math.

After about ten minuten the boy sitting behind her raised his hand, asking for water. Silver had been in mostly the same classes as him almost the entire jaar and she had never heard him talk before. She had never really even noticed him before. He had long, blonde hair that was almost white and black eyes. The teacher, Mrs. Taylor dismissed...
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June 17th 100,000,000 BC 12 O'clock at night
Four children are born, quadruplets, the youngest born at the strike of midnight. The first child is named Queverial, the seconde Ceelarion, the third Ierailiasha, and the last one is named Mist. The father decides the last child should have a complex name as the others do but the mother has made up her mind that Mist is the perfect name.
Then she sends them through the mirror of fate to find there destiny and they may never return if they do not find it in time.

January 21st 90,000,000 BC 3:30 P.M.
The children grow up living in the chosen lands...
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Just a few things before the story; one, if there's something u don't like about it, please tell me! I want it to be as good as it can be. ^-^ Just please tell me in a respectful way, please. I would appreciate that. Thank you.
Also, this story will be a little (well, meer than a little) bloody and violent, and there may be some cussing later on. Just a warning.
That being said, I hope u like it!
_____________________________________________

Gnarled branches. Green leaves grew from them—green leaves spotted with yellows and reds. They rustled dryly, talking of the upcoming season of autumn....
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(Jade’s POV)

“John…I’m bored” I whined to my friend in the other room. “Well i’m sorry Jade, but i don’t know what do do about that” John zei walking in with a bowl of popcorn he popped himself. “What about Rose and Dave?” I asked sneaking some popcorn away from the bowl. “What about them?” Dave asked sitting the bowl on the coffee tafel, tabel in the middle of the room. “Can we invite them over? And can u change out of the girl’s uniform?” I asked. He cheeks grew pink, “It’s comfortable.” “Oh John, u little boy” I zei ruffling his hair up. “Fine Jade,...
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posted by Bluekait
There are some things about Justin Bieber, this "role model" for kids, that u may not know. Sorry to any of the Beliebers out there.

He's attacked and screamed obscenities at photographers. [1] He says rape happens for a reason. [2] He wrote in the guest book at Anne Frank's house that he "wishes she was a Belieber." [3] When he was asked to try being vegan, he spit out the vegan biefstuk that was specially prepared for him and made gagging sounds. [4] He peed in a restaurant kitchen. [5] He's frequently late to his own concerts. [6] He's been kicked out and banned from places for throwing temper...
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Now, there's no denying that Dani is pretty adorable. She's playful and immature, just like a little girl should be, as u can see from the scene where she comes out of the closet and scares Max. She has the spirit of a cute little girl, as she loves trick-or-treating.

However, after the first few minuten of screen time she has, her character started going downhill for me. She screams for her mother at the top, boven of her lungs when Max refuses to take her trick-or-treating, which makes me think she's spoiled. She's acting all tough and brave against vlaamse gaai, jay and Ernie "Ice", but ends up doing this...
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posted by justinfangrrl
Hello, and Welcome to my article; in this artikel I will tell u about the environment, what's happening now, what will happen VERY soon if we continue to pollute the earth and what we can do to stop it.

I will also tell u about the Idle no more movement and the First Nations who are leading it; it's trying to save the environment, like me.

So read and enjoy; perhaps I shall educate u in a good way.

Everything in this artikel is true and based on Scientific, religious and environmental research and up to datum facts.

***

Remember when the whole 2012 thing happened? Yeah, that was funny... Here...
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