Random Article: I'm So Goth that.......

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posted by montgomeryraina

got this off a website :)

1. I'm so goth, I got a tattoo of celtic knotwork starting at the top, boven of my head, winding all the way down my body, and trailing five feet behind me on the floor.

2. I'm so goth I AM a tattoo.

3. I'm so goth my name is "Tattoo" and I was on Fantasy Island.

4. I'm so goth, in preschool, the only crayon I used was black.

5. I 'm so goth I use black cotton balls.

6. I'm so goth I dyed my shadow black.

7. I'm so goth I dyed my belly button black.

8. I'm so goth my pupils are black.

9. I'm so goth my black is blacker than your black. I call it "black black."

10. I'm so goth, whenever I walk into a room, all the lights go out.

11. I'm so goth the people in the grocery store have refused to sell me any cereal other than Count Chocula.

12. I'm so goth people ask me to AUTOGRAPH boxes of Count Chocula.

13. I'm so goth people touch me and they BECOME goth. They say, "Oh no, now I'm goth!"

14. I'm so goth I wear sunglasses when I open the refrigerator.

15. I'm so goth I don't paint my nails black--I bash them with a hammer.

16. I'm so goth I died and didn't notice.

17. I'm so goth, whenever I knock on somebody's door they give me candy.

18. I'm so goth I write everything on black paper with a black pen in the dark and can never read what the hell I've written!

19. I'm so goth, I'm not only "goth," but also "gothe" "goff" "gawth" "gauwth" "gothic" "gothik" "gothique" and "gawfickk" and soon I hope to be "gauewthickueu."

20. I'm so goth I make Richard Simmons sad.

21. I'm so goth I steal your Happy Meal.

22. I'm so goth I offered to sell my soul to the devil and he wouldn't take it!

23. I'm so goth, when I stop pouting, people ask, "What are u so happy about?"

24. I'm so goth, when I go outside, the sun sets.

25. I'm so goth the smile muscles in my face have atrophied.

26. I'm so goth the smile muscles in my face never GREW. What's a smile?

27. I'm so goth, when I was born, the doctor asked me, "What's with the shades?"

28. I'm so goth I say things like "eternally yours in darkness" and "love and darkness" and "may the eternal darkness of the abyss enrapture and enshroud u in its infernal sickly sweet embrace."

29. I'm so goth I'm a mime.

30. I'm so goth I don't use fabric softener, because I like pain.

31. I'm so goth I'm shocked door heterosexuality.

32. I'm so goth I set off airport metal detectors from ten feet away with all my jewelry.

33. I'm so goth I'm the only REAL goth.

34. I'm so goth I have rigor mortis whenever I'm with my girlfriend.

35. I'm so goth I smoke cloves in the shower.

36. I'm so goth I killed myself . . . twice.

37. I'm so goth a little rain wolk follows me wherever I go and rains on me.

38. I'm so goth I AM the rain cloud.

39. I'm so goth I'm meer goth than anyone else.

40. I'm so goth my diapers were pvc.

41. I'm so goth I got my medulla oblongata pierced.

42. I'm so goth I got my mom pierced.

43. I'm so goth I pierced all my tattoos.

44. I'm so goth it takes me an uur and a half to get dressed.

45. I'm so goth it takes me longer to get UNdressed.

46. I'm so goth I'm dead.

47. I'm so goth I think electrical tape is a fashion accessory.

48. I'm so goth I carry black food dye around in case I have to eat anything that's not black.

49. I'm so goth I look like Michael Jackson.

50. I'm so goth, in preschool, all my drawings were titled, "DEATH."

51. I'm so goth, in high school, all my papers were titled, "DEATH."

52. I'm so goth my mom is a ninja.

53. I'm so goth all ninjas are my mom.

54. I'm so goth, as soon as I was born I put eyeliner on. And I put on too much.

55. I'm so goth I slather on spf 45 before I open the refrigerator.

56. I'm so goth I think Jesus might have been a vampire.

57. I'm so goth I wore corsets in preschool.

58. I'm so goth I wonder if my dog's kraag would look better on me.

59. I'm so goth I KNOW my dog's kraag looks better on me.

60. I'm so goth I stal my dog's collar.

61. I'm so goth, when I was born, I asked for a light for my clove.

62. I'm so goth I ate a Happy Meal . . . because I like to live dangerous.

63. I'm so goth little kids are mesmerized door my appearance.

64. I'm so goth parents leg their kids when they see them mesmerized door my appearance.

65. I'me soe gothe ie thinke puttinge e'se one thee endse ofe mye wordse ise medaevale ande deepe.

66. I'm so goth I've been banned.

67. I'm so goth nobody understands me, especially when I say, "the boom boom like shockalocka!!! flibbaflobba!!!"

68. I'm so goth I don't take my medications, so I can be meer goth.

69. I'm so goth, when I was born the doctor slapped me and I didn't cry.

70. I'm so goth I make flowers wilt.

71. I'm so goth I like them better that way.

72. I'm so goth I punched a care bear.

73. I'm so goth I think saying "oh my goth" is cute.

74. I'm so goth, when I smile people ask me what's wrong.

75. I'm so goth little old ladies in walkers kruis the straat to insult me.

76. I'm so goth I keep getting hit on door necrophiliacs!

77. I'm so goth I rooted for Gargamel.

78. I'm so goth I practice my blank stare in the mirror.

79. I'm so goth I tried to be a hippie once and hugged a tree--and it died.

80. I'm so goth that when I moved into Mr. Roger's neighborhood, he moved away!

81. I'm so goth I pierced both my nipples--does that shock you?--then I went to the genetic engineering lab and had my genetic structure altered to grow another nipple, then I had THAT one pierced.

82. I'm so goth I have carpal tunnel syndrome from constantly putting the back of my hand to my forehead.

83. I'm so goth that whenever I walk into a room, u hear "Toccata and fugue in D minor."

84. I'm so goth I listen to The Sisters of Mercy and Bauhaus simultaneously at midnight in a graveyard sitting in a pentagram surrounded door candles & and oh, there's a full moon & and then I die. And then I come back to life. And then I die again & tragically.

85. I'm so goth I have actually seriously uttered the phrase, "the darkest dark of the dark darkness."

86. I'm so goth I tried to use Cheer . . . it cried.

87. I'm so goth, when I'm sleeping people come and check my pulse.

88. I'm so goth I don't have a pulse.

89. I'm so goth I know what pvc stands for.

90. I'm so goth the people at the suicide hotline have asked me to stop calling.

91. I'm so goth I wear pvc pajamas.

92. I'm so goth I'm catholic.

93. I'm so goth nuns and priests resent me because I look koeler, koelwagen in black than them.

94. I'm so goth I changed my name to Mystryss Darque Wintyr Nyght Rayn Ravyn.

95. I'm so goth I don't have a name. I'm just "goth."

96. I'm so goth all I do is sit around and talk about how goth I am.

97. I'm so goth I always use the word "goth" instead of "got."

98. I'm so goth every sentence I say has the word "goth" in it.

And finally...

99. I'm so goth I'm the only person who understands what goth REALLY is, and I'm not telling you!

deathding, _naiza and 8 others like this

siory riiiiiiiiiii.............ggggggggggghhhhhhhhttttttttttt

siory go goth person thingy

Insane4ever Eh ROFLMAO.........o.O....go kill your self the third time.....maybe someone finally cares....

r-pattz LMAO. This is hilarious. XD

EmzLovesCheryl LOL. Best list I've seen in ages! :')

Goldilottes theyre awesome, 95 made me lol i used to do 73 around die-hard religious people so they didnt get offended

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black zwaan-, zwaan movie

added by alizoula

2

funny ways to annoy people/funny pranks

posted by akatsuki_lover9

Ways to Annoy:
1.say a random word for no reason all the time.
2.put spicy stuff in a food they like.
3.make a loud farting noise from your mouth and say "uh oh, i sharted."
4.make a farting noise from your mouth and blame it on the guy volgende to you.
5.go to a drive thru, get your face right up to the speaker and yell as loud as u can.
6.make a REALLY annoying noise all the time.
7.Write using only crayons, markers and paint.
8.When guests are at your house go into the keuken-, keuken and come out with ketchup all over u and say "THE BOOGIE MAN IS HERE!" a bunch of times.
9.in school if there's a problem...

21

"I wasn't that drunk......"

posted by awesomeblossom1

Here's some of my fave "I wasnt that drunk" jokes hope u like :)
"I wasn't that drunk"
"You saw a ginger girl eating blueberries and screamed 'No Foxface! Not the berries!'"
"You ran into Walmart and when u heard someone talking on the intercom, u fell to your knees and said, 'God has spoken!'"
"You grabbed my parakeet, threw it at my sisters piggy bank and yelled, 'ANGRY BIRDS!!!!!'"
"You told me to give u a ride home pagina and the part was at your house"
"You asked your girlfriend if she was single"
"You gave a midget a paddestoel and yelled 'GROW MARIO GROW!!!'"
"You were cutting open pineapples...

17

40 Things Boys Should NEVER do in a Relationship

posted by jayjay4life

1. Don't EVER tell us to CALM DOWN when we're angry. We hate that, and it often makes the situation worse.
2. Don't act like u know what you're talking about when u don't. It just pisses us off.
3. Don't treat us badly and with disrespect.
4. Don't give us commands like we're some kind of dog. We're your equal and should be treated as such.
5. Sure, you're the guy, so u can act like you're the stronger one... Whatever... But, don't EVER act like you're the head of the house. Relationships are to be an equal situation.
6. Don't yell at us when we do something wrong.
7. When u screw up, don't...

3

Official Funniest Jokes Of All Time!!!

posted by Shelly_McShelly

Researchers in the UK examined meer than 1000 jokes and placed them before 36,000 voters to determine the "official" 50 funniest jokes of all time.

And here they are:

50. I went to the Doctors the other day, and he said, 'Go to Bournemouth, it's great for flu'. So I went - and I got it.

49. A zeehond, seal walks into a club...

48. Went to the corner koop - bought 4 corners.

47. So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants, it was Wedgie Kray.

46. I'll tell u what I love doing meer than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase. I can hardly contain myself.

45. I tried water polo...

35

63 Ways to Piss Off a Cop

posted by milorox18

1. When u get pulled over, say “What’s wrong, ossifer, there’s no blood in my alcohol?”

2. When he asks why u were speeding, tell him u wanted to race.

3. When he talks to you, pretend u are deaf.

4. If he asks if u knew how fast u were going, say no, my speedometer only goes to……

5. Ask if u can see his gun.

6. When he says u aren’t allowed, tell him I just wanted to see if mine was bigger.

7. Touch him.

8. When he asks why u were speeding, tell him u had to buy a hat.

9. Ask him where he bought his cool hat.

10. Refer to him door his first name.

11. Pretend u are gay...

11

Funny Bumper Sticker Quotes...

posted by Mallory101

" Watch out for the idiot behind me!"
Moooooove, I'm trying to speed!
If you're rich, I’m single!
0-60 in 15 minutes!
A clean car is a sign if sick mind.
100% Irony Free
Adrenalin is my drug of choice.
Adults are just kids with money.
Baby on bored
HOME SCHOOL. Smarter than ever.
I talk to strangers
I Think Feminists Are Cute!
Keep honking, I am reloading!
Pain is inevitable misery is optional.
To All u Virgins: Thanks For Nothing.
Tennis players have fuzzy balls.
Your honor student deals the best drugs.

The fastest way to a fisherman's hart-, hart is through his fly
Stupidity is not a crime so you’re...

65

18 Fun Things to do in a Final Exam That Does not Matter (ie, u are going to fail no matter what)

posted by slytherin360

found this on the net:

18 Fun Things To Do In A Final That Does Not Matter (i.e. u are going to fail the class completely no matter what u get on the final exam)

1) Get the copy of the exam, run out screaming "Andre, Andre, I've got the secret documents!"

2) Talk the entire way through the exam. Read vragen aloud, debate your antwoorden with yourself out loud. If asked to stop, yell out, "I'm SOOO sure u can hear me thinking." Then start talking about what a jerk the instructor is.

3) Bring cheerleaders.

4) Walk in, get the exam, sit down. About five minuten into it, loudly say to the...

163

24 Fun Things To Do on the Elevator

posted by slytherin360

Found this on the net:

24 Fun Things To Do In An Elevator

1. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, dammit, all of u just shut UP!"

2. Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly.

3. Crack open your aktentas, werkmap of purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?"

4. Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.

5. Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.

6. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they...

8

Annoying Things To Say To Other People

posted by BellaCullen96

Check out this infected canker sore in my mouth!
I work for the IRS.
Have u ever tried cat meat?
I don't know why I ate it - liver and onions always gives me gas.
I just had a proctological exam - wow, worth every penny!
The last time my head rang like this I woke up with a dead man volgende to me!
I puked on the last person who flew volgende to me.
My butt reeeally itches!
Would u look at the size of the hair I just yanked out of my nose!
My psychiatrist says that flying helps offset my desire to mutilate small, defenseless, woodland creatures.
The last guy who ignored me is still on a respirator....

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Reverse thinspo

added by loonybug

Source: tumblr

1

Daniel Browning Smith ♥

added by RoohWinchester

Source: Google

4

Brother & Sister

added by SylarNight

Source: made door SylarNight

My Fan-Cast for the Wicked Movie

posted by KataraLover

As many of u are aware, I absolutely ADORE Wicked and I'm so excited about the movie adaptation that is just taking FOREVER to be made, even before the pandemic came along. So, like many people, I just keep wanting them to make some casting announcements for the movie already and have been making my own fan-cast for the movie, even making a video of my fan-cast. However, I felt like taking the time to explain my casting choices so everyone knows why I made my choices. I will provide my fan-cast video at the end, so u can hear the vocal capabilities. Please keep in mind that this is just...

1

NikPiks - David Cage and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Game

posted by Windwakerguy430

David Cage, the creator of many famous games of the recent era. A man who is zei to be one of the most creative minds in gaming right now. And yet, no matter who u ask, there is only two opinions on this guy. There’s the people who like David Cage and then there are the people who don’t. And I’m one of the people who don’t. Welcome to an episode of Content Cuck. And this is the David Cage and Quantic Dream rant article. I’m here to discuss all the flaws of every Quantic Dream game, yes, all five of them, and talk about the flaws of David Cage, from the self centered behavior to...

3

animu grills

added by 8theGreat

Kim Yoo Jung

added by ace2000

1

Random Boobs Justice

added by TheLefteris24

Nick Wilde

added by ace2000

1

Deer

added by tanyya