Barbie in the Nutcracker

. Before reading any fanfiction, listen to "Whip My Hair" door Willow Smith. (Trust me, it helps.)
. Read crappy of overdescriptive fanfics in a dramatic voice.
. If it's REALLY crappy, draw a picture of it.
. After reading, try to picture it in your mind.
. If with a group, act it out with friends.
. Everytime a fanfiction mentions food, particularily what they're gonna eat, throw geroosterd brood, toast at your screen.
. Imagine the lead character as Ebony Dar'kness Dementia Raven Way (Google it).
. If there's an angsty part, yell "AAAAAANNNNNGGGGSSSSTTTT".
. If it's about your OTP, then say "DAWW!" after every sentance....

hallo there Delilah, I’ve been pacing the pews in a church corridor, but I’ve got a short attention span. I’m a natural disaster, and…oh, wait! Here I go again! I’m Cinderella on her bedroom floor, oh dear Butcher, what happened? I’m gonna sleep my whole life away, cos I’m only waiting on the volgende best thing. I’m a sheepish wolf, but I only eat buttons. Don’t u even think of putting your teeth on me! Now I’m of consenting age, but I’m forever young. I’m the greatest thing you’d ever imagine, but I’m sick and tired of waiting in your red pick-up truck. I’m headed...