Critical Analysis of Twilight Article: Twilight... The Right Way

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posted by xxXsk8trXxx

This artikel may be offencive to a lot of Twihards. Viewer disgrettion is advised

Edward: Bella,I'm dangerous, stay away.
Bella: But Edward, I love you!
Edward: Me too, but I'm dangerous, so u have to stay away from me
Bella: But Edward, you're the love of my life! We have to be together!
Edward: Fear me and my sparkiling skin! *takes off shirt*
Bella: Wait a second, u sparkle?
Edward: Isn't it frightening?
Bella: No. Sorry to break it to ya Edward, but it's gay
Edward: I kissed Emmet one time...
Bella: How old are you?
Edward: 100
Bella: Eeew! Aren't there laws about 100 jaar olds and 17 jaar olds being together?
Edward: Who cares about thoes laws, I love u and u and u love me...
Bella: Correction. I hate you. Your skin sparkles and you're gay. Not to mention your age.
Edward: But Bella...
Bella: *leaves*
Edward: I knew I should've taken Jessica!

Bella: *at Jacob's* Hey, Jake!
Jacob: Hi!
Bella: So wassup?
Jacob: You're pretty
Bella: Excuse me?
Jacob: *trys to touch boobs*
Bella: *pulls hand away* Jacob!
Jacob: You're pretty
Bella: Okay, that's enough! You're not getting any of me! *leaves*
Jacob: ... she's pretty

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~THE volgende DAY~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bella: *at mayors* MAYOR! MAYOR!
Mayor: What is it?
Bella: SO THERE'S VAMPIRES AND WEARWOLVES! I HAVE PHOTOGRAPHIC EVIDENCE!!!!!!!!!!! *shows evidence*
Mayor: HOLY COW! LET'S GET EM!!!!!

*at Cullens house*
Mayor: We're banning u from the town.
Carslile: But...
Mayor: verplaats SOMEWHERE ELSE! YOUR HOUSE AND ALL OF YOUR THINGS ARE ON SALE, VAMPIRES! YOU'RE NOT EVEN VAMPIRES! u SPARKLE!
Bella: Yeah!
Edward: Bella, how could you?
Bella: u liyng bitch!

*at Quillitete tribe bonfire place*
Mayor: verplaats YOUR TRIBE SOMEWHERE ELSE, WOLVES!
Sam: Who did this?
Bella: Me, dog.
Sam: Grr....
Jacob: ... She's pretty
Sam: LETS GET HIM!!!!
Mayor: WHO'S THE MAYOR OF THIS TOWN? verplaats NOW!

The quillitetes and the cullens moved away. Bella found a nice well-rounded guy with black hair and blue eyes named Marcus, whom she married. Edward became gay, and Jacob just couldn't stop thinking about Bella. He tried to stalk her, and now is imprisoned for life.

and that's my version of Twilight!

AlmostGenius, Kassaremidylynn and 17 others like this

TDI_Angel LOL thats hilarious! XD

bendaimmortal "Edward: Fear me and my sparkiling skin! *takes off shirt* Bella: Wait a second, you sparkle? Edward: Isn't it frightening?" xDD I think I'm gonna live a good 50 years longer for that. (As laughins's supposed to prolong life.) "Sam: Who did this? Bella: Me, dog. Sam: Grr.... " That was great too. :'D Ah but all in all, this is goooood. The only thing I found a tad too old is the whole gay theme. I've never been big on gay humour (nor gay fiction) anyway but by now it's also really is getting old. I am not a homophobi at all, in any way, and that's exactly why I feel this way. But don't get me wrong - I honestly really do enjoy this. 4 stars. (:

Frizzhead Lol so funny but i tink the obbsessive people wont like being called twihards

XChatterbox14x hehe thats funny - " you're not even vampires you sparkle!" so true - though im a twilight fan

kayleebabee HAA! i am going to live for ages it was am hour ago that i actually started to write this...

spellpatronus ROFL!

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Twilight Funnies

added by KateKicksAss

1

Twilight Funnies

added by KateKicksAss

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Keeping Our Spot Tidy

posted by Cinders

"Tidy" is an unusual word for me, but I felt if I used "clean" it would be interpreted as another warning against mudslinging and immaturity.

What I mean is, I see a lot of repeated content on this spot. Particularly images. Most of the time, I don't commentaar on it, because if I like to point out a repeated image, I also like to link to the original image in that spot. Unfortunately, I'm generally too lazy to do a zoek because the vague trefwoorden being attatched to our afbeeldingen don't make our zoek bar very helpful.

So consider this an appeal from an anal-retentive credit-crazy trefwoord queen:...

Twilight Facts

added by cassie-1-2-3

Source: twilightfacts.tumblr.com

1

Twilight Facts

added by cassie-1-2-3

Source: twilightfacts.tumblr.com

Twilight Facts

added by cassie-1-2-3

Source: twilightfacts.tumblr.com

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Screw Bella

added by rachaelwsz

Source: Facebook (YingYing)

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How to Identify a Fangirl (Part 1, Beginner/Intermediate)

posted by renrae

This artikel is not meant to offend. It is mostly comedy and uses examples from meer fandoms then just Twilight. There will also be examples that tak lyke dis and capslock. So be careful when reading.

I'm sure we are all familiar with a fangirl. (Or fanboy, but they are different and we will not be discussing them today.) Put simply, fangirls are very, very, VERY big fans of something. Twilight fangirls are obsessed with Twilight and will probably have as much Twilight merchandise as possible. A Bangel fangirl may eat u in your sleep if u are a hardcore Spuffy shipper, and a fanpop fangirl...