Let’s talk about Slim Jesus for a moment. He’s a white guy who's rapping is so bad, he make Vanilla Ice look black. Also, he’s a 100% asshole. Meeting this guy really isn’t all that special. In fact, it isn’t. Meeting this guy is like meeting Hitler. Yeah, he’s famous. But for all the wrong reasons. And that is exactly what my brother did. My brother has a lot of vrienden around Southwest Ohio, where I happen to live. One of the towns my brother usually visits is Hamilton, which, honestly, makes Middletown look peaceful. The town is filthy, its dangerous, and there are lots of gangs. So, my brother told me that he was with one of his vrienden at a nearby McDonalds. He and his vrienden were just talking and laughing, when all of a sudden, guess who shows up? That’s right, it’s the Trying-So-Hard-To-Be-Black-He-Ends-Up-Whiter-Than-Everyone-Else, Slim Jesus. This guy walked in and started treated the McDonalds employees so horribly. He insulted them, asked for food in the rudest way possible, and he looked like a douchebag, sounded like a douchebag, and, I didn’t think was possible, but he found a way to just breathe like a douchebag, as if he was all hot shit. After Slim Jesus left (Again, like a douchebag) My brother described him as, and I quote “Kind of an asshole”. Little did my brother know that, two years later, Slim Jesus would make a fucking awful rap song while waving BB guns around. Though, if u read my other stories, than, yeah, I guess the BB guns scare me. But for the rest of the world, this guy should just go back to the 70s sitcom neighborhood he came from, because u can’t get meer caucasian even if u tried.
Tingle: Oh, hello aga-
Link: GIVE ME THE FUCKING MAP
Tinge: Well, lets see (Counts bag of rupees) Well, it seems to be about right. Here is your map
Link: GREAT! HOW MUCH MAPS DO I NEED LEFT
Tingle: Hmm...... About four
Link: THANK u (Leaves)
King of Red Lions: So, where is the volgende Triforce shard
Link: ON SOME STUPID ISLAND
King of Red Lions: Then let us be off
Link: GOOD IDEA
King of Red Lions: ......Um...... Why are u still yelling. You've been doing that ever since we left the Wind Temple
Link: I TOLD YOU! I'M REALLY FUCKING PISSED
King of Red Lions: Oh right
TO BE CONTINUED
Link: GIVE ME THE FUCKING MAP
Tinge: Well, lets see (Counts bag of rupees) Well, it seems to be about right. Here is your map
Link: GREAT! HOW MUCH MAPS DO I NEED LEFT
Tingle: Hmm...... About four
Link: THANK u (Leaves)
King of Red Lions: So, where is the volgende Triforce shard
Link: ON SOME STUPID ISLAND
King of Red Lions: Then let us be off
Link: GOOD IDEA
King of Red Lions: ......Um...... Why are u still yelling. You've been doing that ever since we left the Wind Temple
Link: I TOLD YOU! I'M REALLY FUCKING PISSED
King of Red Lions: Oh right
TO BE CONTINUED